Topeka ? Making the decision to terminate their pregnancies because of severe fetal problems was heartbreaking, two women said Thursday.

Now the women say they live in fear that their private medical records will be reviewed by a grand jury – and possibly others – investigating abortion provider Dr. George Tiller.

The two women use pseudonyms to protect their identity. In court papers they are referred to as Jane Doe and Paula Poe.

“It’s absolutely terrifying that someone is going to have my records,” said Doe. “And who knows where they will end up. They can’t put in enough safeguards.”

A grand jury in Wichita – convened through a petition drive conducted by anti-abortion activists – has subpoenaed medical records for women who received services at Tiller’s clinic from July 1, 2003, through Jan. 18, 2008.

The anti-abortion groups allege Tiller has violated state restrictions on late-term abortions. Tiller has denied any wrongdoing.

Tiller and a group of his patients are seeking to block access to the records. The fight is pending before the Kansas Supreme Court.

An interview with Doe and Poe was requested by the Journal-World and arranged through the New York-based Center for Reproductive Rights.

Poe said she and her husband decided to have an abortion after doctors determined her fetus had osteogenesis imperfecta, which was already causing the fetus’ bones to break in the womb.

Poe was told the baby – a female – would likely die before birth, and if she lived, she would die shortly afterward.

“She would just lie there in agony and pain until she died. We couldn’t kiss her, we couldn’t hold her hand,” Poe said.

Doe said she and her husband decided to have an abortion after doctors told her that her child had a 3 percent chance of surviving birth because of a severe heart defect.

If the child survived, surgeries would have been immediately necessary, and even then there was a good chance she would have lived for only a short time and in a vegetative state.

Both women said they had the abortions out of compassion for their children. They each praised Tiller’s handling of the situations and criticized anti-abortion groups for pursuing charges against him.

Before she was confronted with her fetal problems, Poe said she considered herself “pro-life.” But, she said, “I had blinders on. There is a gray area. There is a whole spectrum of colors.”

The issue of protecting the identity of women whose records were subpoenaed was a major question in arguments before the state Supreme Court earlier this week.

Anti-abortion groups say the records can be analyzed with any information that identify the women being hidden.

“We’re not interested in knowing the identities of the women,” said Troy Newman, president of Operation Rescue. “They’re hiding behind the skirts of their patients, using them as a shield against being investigated.”

But several justices, the attorney general’s office and others raised concerns about privacy, including the chance that expert witnesses reviewing records could then leak out information.

The two women declined to provide any information that they thought would identify them, although they said they were from the Midwest. Suzanne Novak, an attorney for the Center for Reproductive Rights, said Doe and Poe received abortions within the time frame of the subpoenas.

Because they are mentioned in court documents and part of the Center’s legal action “we would be subject to severe penalties if any of this were a ruse,” Novak said.

Doe and Poe said they decided to talk to the media because they wanted people to know about the anguish surrounding their personal decisions to have an abortion.

“We are loving parents and didn’t want to see our children suffer,” Doe said.