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and it's a darn shame too that pre-schoolers are forced to be institutionalized at such a young age. They need to be home with their mommy's and nutured not babysat all day by strangers or non-family members. another pet-peeve I have is seeing these mothers tote their babies around in those car seats carriers. When my children were babies I carried them on my hip. That's why God gave women strong hips to carry their babies. No wander some of our kids grow up with distance bonding with their mothers. DUH!! Motherhood isn't what it used be. Think about it.
No. My mother actually loved me.I kid! I kid!At first glance, though -- and I'm still not sure -- I thought sunshine_noise was being ironic.
it is an inevitable consequence of both parents being at work, sunshine. i fully support the decision of many women to pursue careers, but families as a whole need to consider the consequences of their children being raised by day-cares and babysitters. whether this means the husband or wife needs to take some time off of work, or both need to scale back their hours, i think most would agree that having parents who are present is more important than being upper middle class rather than (gasp!) merely middle class.
With all of the idiots who decide to parent today, perhaps daycare is a better option for the kids. Most stay-at-homes that I know have children who would benefit from being at least partially raised by someone else.
I am trying not to take offense at sunshine_noise's comment but it really upsets me to have someone judge working mothers so harshly. I have to work to support my family. Yes, I decided to have children. I do not have a family member that can stay home with my kids all day. My children are in a loving day-care where they receive one on one care and are taught preschool in the home. I find it hard to believe that you could make it in today's economy with two working class parents and have one stay at home with the kids. I do not feel guilty for working. I have a great relationship with my kids. I think you need to think through something before you just start spouting your belief system all over the place. The government has decided that the safest place for infants is in their car seat carrier when in a vehicle. It is a pain in the rear to get the baby in and out of the car seat. It is less distressing and healthy to stay in the seat when at the store than to put my baby in a dirty cart full of germs. I am glad you were blessed with such large hips and you lugged your kids on them all day. Woo hoo. Good for you. You need a metal. Get real and stop telling me how to raise my family.
I was in daycare because my two incredibly loving parents were incredibly hardworking. As a result, I made new friends from a very young age, I learned how important hard work was from my parents, and I was still loved more than words can explain. Their work ethic was passed on to me and I am an incredibly hard worker with the resulting success because of my parents influence. I couldn't have asked for a better way to grow up...yeah, daycare is horrible for kids... ;)
Babies and motherhood are sooooo overrated.
Oh, Pogo, I don't know about that. I've stayed home with my kids and will be starting my career in a couple of years. It's been tough, but it's also been worth it.
So... you were raised by a wolf ( -of-a-dog ) .
Sorry Sunshine, but you are wrong. There are quite a few longitudinal studies coming out that show that children who go to daycare and children who stay home grow up the same when all other factors are the same.A child will grow up healthy if he or she has a parent(s) who set appropriate boundaries, maintain a harmonious(not quiet, harmonious) environment and are involved in their children's education and lives.It doesn't matter if the mother stays home or not. If you have a stressed out stay at home mom that yells at her kid or sleeps all the times or is depressed, the child of the working parent, who is happy, fullfilled and who maintains the appropriate boundaries, will be happier and healthier. If you have a child whose mom is a stay at home mom, who is happy, fullfilled and maintains appropriate boundaries, you will have a happy child. I have been a foster parent for a little under 5 years and have taken numerous child developement courses, and while I do not claim to be an "expert, what I do know is that sexual orientation, marital status, working vs stay at home, or any of those other demographics people try to put parents in, really do not play a big part in whether or not a child grows up healthy.What matters is if the parent(s) have the appropriate skills to maintain a healthy, structured, loving environment. And if they don't, it doesn't matter if mom stays home all day or not.DenaP.S. As for the baby carrier thing, I do, to a point, agree with you. Young babies should be carried a lot (not all the time but a lot) because they get a sense of security and trust trust from being held close to mom and/or dad. If a parent doesn't want to hold the child when they are shopping, that is fine as long as later on, they hold the child close,and interact with the child. Trust me, both the child and the parent will love it!
I went to daycare growing up and I also stayed at the neighbor's house where I was watched. I don't hate my parents and have a very nice relationship with them. In this economy and in that one you have to make things work however you can and if that means having someone else watch your kids so you can work to put food on the table, so be it. You don't have to be with your kids 24/7 to know them and have a loving relationship with them.
I think most parents who can afford for one or the other to stay at home do so. Unfortunately most middle class, 2 income families do not have that luxury. My widowed grandmother came to live with us and therefore my mother was able to work outside the home. The income was desperately needed. As this was back in the early 60's, daycare, as we know it today, was not readily available anyhow, so this worked out well.
I wasn't saying I know it all and I don't put blame on the parents DUH - sorry I miss- communicated this. It's the way our society is going where both parents are forced to work. I feel so bad that my 8 year old (grandson) was forced to get out of bed early this summer so I could drop him off at daycare to go to work. Instead of being able to spend those days with him and do whatever the day allows us to do. I remember my summers were so free and fun, but his are so regimented and I feel he misses out on so much. I have no choice but to work as most parents do. Denak you are so RIGHT about a stressed out mom or one that sleeps all day staying home with the kids. In that circumstance the kids are better off in daycare. Society has changed for our kids they don't have the freedom my generation did in playing and exploring life. Instead they have no choice but to grow up in a regimented environment which I think in some ways stifles their imagination, creativity and spontinaity (sp?). So they either grow up at puppets or rebels without a cause. I think most daycares are good - I've had good luck while living here in Lawrence, and my 8 year old has been happy. I don't think I could have done better. But I still have a problem with mothers toting their babies around in those buckets (known as carriers) - barring the grocery store (makes sense to leave them in it for that). They don't have to live in the darn thing. IT just looks so impersonal. So just because I stated my opinion doesn't mean I'm trying to tell someone how to live - it's just my opinion which I am entitled too. so get over it already!!
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