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Archive for Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Daughter’s death spurs parents to talk about ‘pass-out game’

August 23, 2005

Many in Lawrence were surprised last week to see Tim and Carol Wilson on NBC's "Today Show," a mere three day's after their 15-year-old daughter Kimberly's funeral.

"It happened so fast, we didn't have time to tell too many people," said Tim Wilson, seated next to his wife in the living room of the family's west Lawrence home.

"We had three hours to pack, round up the (three surviving) kids and get to the airport," Carol Wilson said.

Kimberly died Aug. 9 while playing something called the "pass out game." Alone in her bedroom, she had wrapped a plastic-coated bicycle chain lock around her neck, looped the chain over a dresser drawer, and seated herself in a position that cut off her air supply.

Among the game's mostly teen-age players, the return to consciousness is said to cause a mind-altering rush that's legal and drug-free.

Kimberly died because she played the game alone. No one was there to revive her.

Rather than privately mourning their daughter's death, the Wilsons decided to use the media to warn others about the game's dangers.

Tim Wilson is a software specialist at the Kansas University Endowment Association. Carol Wilson formerly taught at Veritas Christian School, where Kimberly was a student.

Photo by Nick Krug

Carol Wilson stops to smell a recently delivered floral bouquet in her kitchen while speaking to a friend on the phone during a break from packing boxes Monday afternoon. Since the death of their daughter Kimberly, who accidentally killed herself while playing the "pass-out game" alone in her room, the Wilsons have decided to move from their home to another Lawrence location.

"We want Kimberly's life to mean something, to save lives," Tim Wilson said. "We very much believe that every person has a positive destiny that's to be fulfilled here on Earth, and when things like this happen, that destiny cannot be fulfilled."

"We want Kimberly's life to make a difference," Carol Wilson said.

Before the "Today Show," they were interviewed for a segment on the Fox news network.

"That was Wednesday at about noon," Tim Wilson said. "About 20 minutes after that, we got a phone call (from a Kansas City network affiliate) that the "Today Show" was interested, and then five minutes later the "Today Show" (in New York) called."

NBC paid for the Wilsons and Kimberly's three sisters to fly to New York and a night's hotel accommodations. The next morning's segment lasted about 10 minutes.

Tim and Carol Wilson were interviewed by Katie Couric. The sisters were off-camera.

"Katie Couric was just awesome. She was very, very nice," Tim Wilson said. "She insisted on meeting the girls. That may not sound like much, but you have to understand when they are filming, they have three different sets and everybody's running back and forth. So for her to stop and spend time with the kids was her making a statement."

The Wilsons also chatted with "Today Show" weatherman Al Roker, whose wife, 20/20 reporter Deborah Roberts, had filmed a segment on the pass-out game in late July.

"He is just as friendly off-camera as he is on-camera," Tim Wilson said.

But the trip was not fun, the Wilsons said. Though composed in front of the cameras, they were grieving.

"I completely lost it on the plane," Carol Wilson said. "I couldn't help myself."

"Half the time we were in the air, I was kneeling in front of Carol, trying to comfort her." Tim Wilson said. "We miss our daughter terribly. I haven't been able to find the words to describe the level of anxiety and pain that we're going through. We think about Kimberly - and about all of our daughters - every minute of every day."

The couple is considering offering their testimony to national associations, making public service announcements and speaking to school groups. They recently launched a Web site, www.kimberwilson.com., aimed at calling attention to the dangers of the pass-out game.

"No family should go through what we're going through," Tim Wilson said.

The couple praised "the people of Lawrence" for their prayers and support.

"We couldn't have made it without them," Carol Wilson said.