Harper’s Island series finale: 25 suspects to 2 killers, few survivors

So murder mystery “Harper’s Island” wraps up what I hope CBS deems a success story, terrifying ratings or not. The 13-episode series is a great concept – the length’s enough to care about the story and characters but not such that writers are mired in illogical plot twists to keep a good show going the optimal four, five, seven seasons. I mean you, “Lost,” “Desperate Housewives,” etc.

To go out on a bloody limb here – if you’re just checking in to read how Harper’s ended, don’t. Don’t read on. Get the DVD. The release date is Sept. 8, and none of the networks will have resumed any good shows yet, anyway.

For the fans who saw the two-hour finale, I’ll keep the recap a little glossy: From 25 suspects, we’re down to one known killer, John Wakefield, and the remaining survivors: Townie Abby and boyfriend Jimmy, her best friend, Henry and his bride-to-be, Trish, Trish’s sister, Shea , and young niece, Madison , and groomsmen Sully and Danny. Most of these folks won’t survive.

First, Sully and Danny capture John Wakefield, giving Abby the chance to finally kill the man who murdered both of her parents. Instead, she clocks him with the butt of her gun. Later: questions, answers, Wakefield’s escape from jail.

Shea reveals to the others that she found a rap sheet on Jimmy, who bops into the jail to announce Trish, with whom he’d been standing guard at a tunnel exit, had lost her balance in the bluffs and might be injured or dead. The survivors know Wakefield needed an accomplice, so Jimmy would nicely fit that scenario. Well, Jimmy had an alibi through countless deaths and was clearly trusted by and saved by Abby’s father, the late Sheriff Mills, so that was a dull hourlong subplot. Henry and Sully nearly kill Jimmy at the bluffs when Trish isn’t found, but her subsequent appearance and declaration the fall was an accident gets Jimmy off the hook, for now. Also: She’s found a boathouse with a working radio. They call the Coast Guard; help’s a few hours away.

Henry and Trish head back to the inn to clean up, where she dons her wedding dress for him, which is when I realize she won’t survive after all. Poor girl. Back at the jail, Wakefield escapes his cell because somebody left him a key – newsflash! Wasn’t Jimmy! – and kills Danny. Interesting side note: IMDB reports the actors didn’t know if their character would die until the day before the next episode’s script was issued. I will enjoy rewatching this in the fall to see how actors handled that. Wouldn’t that create great tension?

Henry and Trish are interrupted by a knock at their cabin door, and Henry heads outside to investigate. Wakefield lets himself in and begins chasing Trish through the woods, where she’s muddying the now-unlucky wedding dress. Oh, I hate this part: She catches Henry and is so relieved she’s safe. Wakefield’s out, she announces. I know, Henry replies: “Sully was right: Wakefield has an accomplice. It’s just not Jimmy.” Katie Cassidy was the best actress in this piece, so I’m glad she had this role: not just the crushed bride, but the one who never suspected her fiancé was a psychopath (I knew! I knew!) who killed almost everyone she loved. Henry seems genuinely sorry for her (“I really wanted to give you the wedding”), but he kills her anyway. I’d hoped she would have a second chance and be the one to take out Henry, but she’s definitely passed on to the Great Hall of Elegant Centerpieces. Wakefield ambles up to see the action. Henry looks up: “Hi, Dad.” That’s the end of the first half.

Part two opens with a flashback to Abby and Henry in a childhood scene. His (adoptive) parents are picking up him from Abby’s, where it’s clear from her mother’s expression that she knows the Dunns adopted the son she had but didn’t want with Wakefield. Abby and Henry have a tender moment saying goodbye that will come back to haunt her.

Shea and daughter Madison reach Sully at the boathouse. Sully announces, for the millionth time, that they’re getting off the island, but this time he isn’t in it for himself. He sets Madison and Shea off in a motorboat and alerts the Coast Guard to pick them up on the way. I’m surprised Shea and Madison aren’t filler fodder to be killed or not killed in the time remaining, but their escape will provide an interesting plot twist in hour two.

Cut to Henry feigning ignorance about Trish’s whereabouts to Abby and Jimmy in the woods, Sully at the boathouse. He’s quite annoyed Shea and Madison were sent to safety. The Coast Guard reports they’re 45 minutes away. Henry has a lot of work to do. Most suspenseful is his well-paced revelation to Sully that he’s Wakefield’s accomplice. (Henry posits that the culprit is Wakefield’s son, and “What if his mom abandoned him, gave him up for adoption, let him be raised by some loser family who never bothered telling him he wasn’t theirs?” Sully: “I’d tell him to grow a pair!”) Henry reveals he killed his (adoptive) brother, J.D.; decapitated the reverend; harpooned Shea’s husband, Richard, and stabbed Katherine. Also, he reveals, Uncle Marty’s suitcase of cash was for Malcolm to start his brewery, but Henry wanted Malcolm to find and be tested by the money instead. “He made good beer, didn’t he?” Henry eulogizes. Sully is almost as crushed as Trish when he realizes, standing between Henry and Wakefield, that his friend has let him down. Like Camerson Richardson’s Chloe, he was a shallow character who developed from fratern-itarian to humanitarian. I would not have pegged him to survive to the final episode, but his scruffy good deeds are put to rest.

Abby and Jimmy, who’d found Trish dead, locate Henry and report his fiancée is gone. Henry’s believability is wavering here, and Jimmy is doing the math pretty quickly, but Wakefield attacks Jimmy at the church. Henry holds Abby back from rescuing Jimmy, instead urging her outside to signal the Coast Guard as the helicopters near. She flees, assuming Henry will help Jimmy. Jimmy hears Wakefield urge Henry that Abby is “getting away” and completes the equation. He throws off Wakefield, and Henry fires his gun.

Henry will pop out after Abby and, at long last, reveal it’s just the two of us, we can make it if we try, just the two of us … Elaine Cassidy is no Trish, but she can turn chalky like nobody’s business. Wakefield comes up behind her, just like with Sully, but here’s surprise No. 1: Henry reaches in like he’ll kill Abby and takes out his father instead. Henry’s best friend and half-sister is off-limits, I guess. Wakefield’s dead. Abby’s in too much shock to put up much of a struggle, but Henry will helpfully knock her out in the head …

And next we pick up with Shea and Madison, dressed and groomed like some time has passed, in a law enforcement office. An agent lays out a photo of Trish and Henry. Shea is told they’re both dead. Huh? Also, the agent lays out Sully’s picture, Jimmy’s and … Abby’s? We found their remains in a fire, the agent says. “Other than a handful of locals, you and your daughter are the only survivors of Harper’s Island.”

Cut to Abby waking up in a strange house. She dresses – (CBS must have promised one last gratuitous shot of her in that black bra), then finds Henry waiting for her. He’s all delighted and adorable and wants to make her breakfast. “What did you do?” Abby whispers. “I chose you,” Henry replies.

Cut back to their childhood scene, where we learn what Abby whispered to Henry: “I wish you could live here with me forever. Just the two of us.” I think she just wanted to play soccer, Henry. Is that really the whole motive here? No, it’s not clear if Henry was hankering to live solo with his last “true” family member, the last person he trusted, or if he wanted to, ahem, play house. There’s definitely a subtle but sexual context to the remaining, horrifying half-hour. Henry is sort of sorry about that, but it’s OK! He’s done killing! He couldn’t think how to get Abby back to the island where his father killed their mother without 1) having a wedding 2) killing everyone in the wedding party (“They had to go. They were in our way.”) 3) blaming it all on Jimmy, who is still alive but trussed up in a storage room until he agrees to sign a confession for the killings. (Suspension of disbelief: code blue.) And then Henry and Abby could live alone in a deserted part of the island, by themselves, make babies and play soccer, at least until Henry’s voices resume. Christopher Gorham is so amazing in this hour of television; so sincere, so puppy-eyed in love, always sort of correcting himself whenever he accidentally smacks Abby around, sort of a psychopath’s “Note to self: I love her, shouldn’t do that” mentality. Unfortunately, this show probably doesn’t have the clout or runtime for Gorham to score an Emmy nomination,. Various other revelations at the Cleaver residence: Henry reconnected with his true father during Wakefield’s rampage; and with dad’s guidance, he committed copycat killings around Seattle-Tacoma. Disappointingly, there’s no mention of whether he killed his adoptive parents. That should be a deleted scene when the DVD rolls out, because that was mentioned enough times over the series …

So Henry takes Abby to Jimmy, but jealousy gets the best of him. Henry gives Abby chase to another rocky bluff, where she’s trapped. But Jimmy escapes and knocks Henry over the bluffs just as the latter is processing that Abby doesn’t ever plan to play house together. Jimmy’s injured; Henry races up behind Abby; she grabs some sort of fishing instrument as she turns around, and Henry impales himself on it. I’ll be darned if he isn’t so … sad … woebegone … I don’t feel sorry for him; I don’t, but one of television’s finest killers in recent memory perishes on the banks of Harper’s Island.

Final scenes: Abby and Jimmy canoodling in the back of a Coast Guard boat, to safety. If there’s a son someday, he’ll be named Freddie Prinze “Fishy” Jr.

But since CBS took a chance on this awesome show, they’re not going to tie it up with the happily-ever-after-an-incestuous massacre scenario. The last scene contains segments from the wedding party’s video for/from the bride and groom. First, Trish, so perky, wearing her pearls, ready to wed. Cut to various groomsmen … Sully, Danny, Malcolm, Booth … then Chloe, then Cal, none suspecting their bronzer is on borrowed time. It’s sort of bittersweet. I guess the best characters can percolate in a single season after all. Then an unsuspecting Abby. She had a poem for the bride and groom that they can’t see until the wedding …

And finally, Henry. So handsome. So insane, so right-in-your-face in the camera. He’s speaking to Trish: “I love you … I’m going to treat every moment with you … as if it were my last. Let’s get married, huh? I’ll see you there.”

Thanks, CBS, for a crazy-good show for fans of a good mystery. Bonus for throwing a bone to the gory horror lovers among us, too. If you have any more single-season series in the works, well … put me on the guest list.