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Letters to the Editor

Dorm policy

September 29, 2007

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To the editor:

It has been brought to my attention that Kansas University is permitting male students to spend weekends with female students in the girl dormitories.

It is my opinion that your newspaper should make this university policy public knowledge. Obviously this policy leads to poor student performance and violates the rights of morally correct students.

As a concerned grandparent of a student who lives in such a dorm and a taxpayer paying taxes to support such a ridiculous policy, let it be known that I will do whatever I can to cause the university to change this policy.

Your assistance would be appreciated. Thank you.

Neil W. Dodge,

Overland Park

Comments

black_butterfly 7 years, 5 months ago

I know, I know, but I ran the spell check and googled it. It is spelled correctly! LOL, but good joke anyway. Nobody knows what one is now days anyway. Oh yes, I did spell then incorrectly didn't I? Boy you bloggers don't miss a thing. Take away my Degree!!!

Richard Heckler 7 years, 5 months ago

These dorm people are adults now. If females desire male company what is so wrong with that? What is going on behind closed doors? Probably you don't know.

" Obviously this policy leads to poor student performance and violates the rights of morally correct students." How do you know these things?

"Morally" correct students likely will not participate or maybe they will if they deem visits morally acceptable according to their interpretation. Have faith in your grandchildren. Mr. Dodge I have every reason to believe that these college students will make the right choices. If some students have problems they can always relocate.

Meanwhile perhaps you and yours could find more to do with your time such as visiting a zoo in nearby KCMO. The zoo is truly expanding to the benefit of the tenants.

BrianR 7 years, 5 months ago

"morally correct"

That's a good one.

laughingatallofu 7 years, 5 months ago

Sorry grandpa, you're off base on this one. If your sons and daughters did their jobs as parents (presumably following your lead), then THEIR daughters should be "morally correct" (your term) and should be able to handle themselves appropriately.

Suggest you go fishing or find someone to play dominoes with.

classclown 7 years, 5 months ago

Another shocking thing is finding out that women no longer wear these bathing suits. http://www.fashion-era.com/images/Edwds1890-1915/beauties.jpg

Oh wait. I just looked at my calender. By golly we're in the 21st century!

Sharon Roullins 7 years, 5 months ago

I feel your pain but realistically, your grandchild couldn't wait to move into the dorms. Did you really think that this type of behavior wouldn't happen? What do you think will happen with overactive hormones, free flowing alcohol and no one there to enforce restraint? My daughter's first year in the dorm was a joke. Her roommate not only had male company but had the gall to have sex right above my daughter's head while she slept in the bunk below. Then when my daughter confronted her, the roomie was neither sorry nor sympathetic. Needless to say, the next year my daughter requested no roommate. I agree with the previous poster that said that parents should have enforced this "moral" behavior long before their children would be going off to college. And some parents know full well their little "angels" are far from that. They allow them to engage in behavior that now they find shocking and degrading. Will the University change their policy? I don't think so. To do so would be saying they take full responsibility of our sons and daughters while they are away from home. But I will say this, the Dorm director and their associates had better change some policies they deem necessary and start informing the residents about the activities going on inside of them. When my daughter lived in McCollum, there was a peeping tom that had sat up a camera in the girl's bathroom. How did she discover this? From a Channel 6 newsreporter set up aside the dorm while she was reporting the story. Go figure!

geekin_topekan 7 years, 5 months ago

Morally correct? Isn't what they have in them thar Moslum contrees?

Bill Chapman 7 years, 5 months ago

If Electricity Comes From Electrons, Does Morality Come From Morons?

Dominic_Sova 7 years, 5 months ago

why would boys want to sleep in the girl's dormitory?

next they'll want to use the girl's lavatory!

ralphralph 7 years, 5 months ago

<<<<<< why would boys want to sleep in the girl's dormitory? next they'll want to use the girl's lavatory!>>>>>>

The lines are too long, they'll never get in there.

tangential_reasoners_anonymous 7 years, 5 months ago

"The lines are too long, they'll never get in there."

... and once in, they'll never get out....

Weezy_Jefferson 7 years, 5 months ago

Do you reader-reaction responders truly believe that the grandfather who submitted this letter is actually going to log on to the Internet and read your words? He's a grandfather, for crying out loud. He probably doesn't even have a DVD player, let alone a computer.

lawrencechick 7 years, 5 months ago

If you want to shack up with your boyfriends, sign up for a coed dorm. Not only is it rude to your roomate , it's also possibly dangerous. Who knows who these guys are that they bring home from a bar? KU should be enforcing their own guidelines.

tangential_reasoners_anonymous 7 years, 5 months ago

On The Record...

"A 77-year-old man reported the incident. Items taken include: camera equipment, iPod, video game equipment and games, and two bottles of liquor. A garage door frame and a car were damaged."

So, I guess that maybe he no longer has an iPod.

toefungus 7 years, 5 months ago

This author points out more than just how young people should act, but proposes a standard. All great people have standards. As a nation, we seem to be in transition and are having trouble agreeing on what is moral and what is immoral. Enemies know this and have chosen this time to attack us on principals instead of territory. We rally our forces on freedom, they rally their forces on morality. Our young people pay the price. If our young people are willing to die for their freedom to share dorm rooms, we will be in this battle for a long time. If not, well, we will need new standards to rally our forces.

tangential_reasoners_anonymous 7 years, 5 months ago

"Who knows who these guys are that they bring home from a bar?"

... or an on-campus youth rally....

sourpuss 7 years, 5 months ago

As much as some people do not want to let go, most Freshmen are legal adults in this country. I suppose if you were sending an under-age student off to college, you should probably make special provisions to have them live with a local family, but once 18, these students can and MUST make their own choices. Some will make really stupid choices, and there isn't much you can do about it. You should always be very careful about who you let into your residence, and yes, some of these girls will get knocked up, some will have their laptops and iPods stolen, and perhaps that will teach them something their parents' didn't. Even if a kid has great, perfect parents, they will still do a few stupid things. KU isn't a babysitter, it is a university. Should they go back to 11 pm curfew, doors locked, no one in or out?

Godot 7 years, 5 months ago

It is amazing how the definition of an adult shifts around where liberals are concerned. When it comes to sexual freedom and privacy rights, 18 is the age of maturity, but when it comes to SCHIP and protection from those dastardly military recruiters, one is considered a child until age 25.

Nikki May 7 years, 5 months ago

It's funny how people start throwing that "liberal" tag around. As a parent, your kid is ALWAYS your kid. I gotta say though, I lived in a coed dorm but on a girls wing and let me say, I can relate to mrsshaden's daughter. My roommate was the same. BUT, we had the same rules as the female dorms. The rule was you could have over night visitors, they just had to be checked in. But ultimately, people don't have to stay the night to be "morally corrupt". You don't need 8 hours of sleep for that.

lildos 7 years, 5 months ago

How does a dorm issue becomes a liberal/conservative issue? Man you guys are good!

Here, let me throw a random sentence here, let's see if you can make this into the stupid liberal conservative dichotomy:

"The weather is really nice today"

Ready, set, troll!

Godot 7 years, 5 months ago

Okay, I'm sorry, I threw the "liberal" in there to tie in the facts that the liberal Democrats in Congress have determined that college students up to age 25 should be considered children so that they can receive subsidized health care, and the notion held by liberal colleges that college students are children who do not have the ability to resist the temptations offered by military recruiters and thus should be protected from them. Yet, when it comes to the freedom, nay, the right, to have sex in a dorm room, all but the few conservative educational institutions consider the students to be adult enough to make that particular decision on their own at 18.

I apologize for pointing out something so obvious.

Hong_Kong_Phooey 7 years, 5 months ago

"lildos": I'm still waiting for someone to come along and somehow tie this into George Bush and the war in Iraq (lest we forget that they are still fighting in Afghanistan every day). You wait - it'll happen.

scarlets_talk 7 years, 5 months ago

hey, wait a minute. Last I checked, the dorm policy was that males have male roommates and females have female roommates? Doesn't this kind of living environment promote and foster HOMOSEXUAL EXPERIMENTATION??? I mean, they may even be seeing each other naked. "Obviously," males and females should SHARE rooms in the first place to encourage proper, "morally correct" heterosexual relations.

Ragingbear 7 years, 5 months ago

Oh how horrid. Adults legally consenting to such "immoral" practices such as touching women or even gasp holding hands!

The entire dorm situation is rather silly anyways. Some colleges think that because they allow students to live in a cramped space with a bunch of other people their own age for a rather high cost for such accommodations should also dictate every point of their life. Brigham Young University (a private school that is actually public) requires specific dress codes and actually forbids any form of dating unless it is double-dates or there is an otherwise qualified chaperon present at all times. Now think of it, your 24 years old. Going for your Phd. And your still not allowed to spend the night with your girlfriend you had since you were 19. Does that actually sound as if your being treated like an adult? But you can join the military, drink, drive and are held 100% accountable for your actions.

been_there 7 years, 5 months ago

Since this is occuring on the weekend, that must mean that the young men are coming from out of town. So let me get this straight, are they too cheap to rent a motel room. These girls probably should realize that if these guys had to pay for a room, they probably wouldn't come as much. In other words, they're after free sex. So how about you girls that are letting them spend the weekend insist they rent a room. If they refuse then they obviously don't think you're worth the money. So if you have hopes of marriage or consisdering living with this guy, you might want to rethink that. Just for fun, try telling them that from now on they have to get a room and see what happens, and if you would come back to this blog and let us know what happened that would be awsome.

fletch 7 years, 5 months ago

You can get in to sleep with your girlfriend pretty easily... if you're a girl.

Richard Heckler 7 years, 5 months ago

In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen.. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.

Pfizer Corp announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of:

MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

If

you don't send this to five old friends right away there will be five fewer people laughing in the world!

average 7 years, 5 months ago

Godot -

Some people are actually sick ("have a condition", as it were) at 18. Some of them poor, even.

There are very few jobs that will hire a 18-year-old HS grad and give him health insurance. The military would, but we are talking about people with medical problems. Many, I believe most, students are on their parents' health insurance plan. If the family needed assistance for health-care before their child was 18, I don't see why they shouldn't get some for several years after. This gives the student a chance to build skills that might translate to a job with health benefits. (Now whether an employer will actually hire a new employee with a "medical condition" is another story.)

average 7 years, 5 months ago

been_there:

No motel in Lawrence will rent a room to someone under 21.

Most likely, the boys in question do live in town, in another dorm or frat-house. The question is "whose roommate is gone for the weekend" and none other.

been_there 7 years, 5 months ago

Well, good, then girls won't have to worry about their roommate bringing back someone that is drunk because you do have to be 21 to drink, LOL

local_support 7 years, 5 months ago

If we can send 18 year olds off to die in war then we should offer them health insurance as well. To me that would seem moral.

mr_economy 7 years, 5 months ago

Those young whippersnappers are having the sex again! I would like to see the data upon which Neil bases his "obvious" claim that there is a positive correlation between sleepovers and poor student performance. I'll leave the promiscuous presumption about "morally correct" students to wallow in its own disgusting filth.

I think the concern for parents/grandparents of GSP/Corbin residents should be less for what occurs in the dorm during the whopping two days per week where men are allowed to stay the night, and more for what happens at the (mostly fraternity, given most GSP/Corbin residents are Greek) parties their (grand)children attend.

Sorry Neil, your antiquated and impractical University-as-moral-police ideas have no place in modern society. If your grand-daughter wishes to embrace the sexual person she is, she will. If she wishes to wait based on a convoluted scheme of morality, then she will. It's a personal choice, and one that should be made not by you, the University, or God, but by her alone.

llama726 7 years, 5 months ago

"Godot (Anonymous) says:

It is amazing how the definition of an adult shifts around where liberals are concerned. When it comes to sexual freedom and privacy rights, 18 is the age of maturity, but when it comes to SCHIP and protection from those dastardly military recruiters, one is considered a child until age 25."

You can't drink booze but you can fight in Iraq. Good call, assbag.

mom_of_three 7 years, 5 months ago

When my husband was at KU, his dorm was an all guys dorm, and I used to stay there some nights from driving out of town. And that was.....a long time ago... I can understand the parent or grandparent thinking that if the student was in an all female dorm, that men would not be allowed, but this is the 21st century, and if the student has trouble studying because there might be a guy in her room during the weekend, (which I think means hanky panky, as my grandmother put it), then it would be hard to study. But not to allow guys in at all is a little hard to do in this day and age. This isn't the 50's anymore.....

bearded_gnome 7 years, 5 months ago

WJ, Do you reader-reaction responders truly believe that the grandfather who submitted this letter is actually going to log on to the Internet and read your words? He's a grandfather, for crying out loud. He probably doesn't even have a DVD player, let alone a computer.

you need to edit and revise your perspect on elderly...otherwise they will hit the delete button on your person...many are doin' just fine with them new-fangled electronics wizzbang thingamabobs. why my own Mom can download color pictures off that thar internet tubes thingy and can actually write internationalistic e-mails. you better watchit, they'll come and tell you "you kid get off my lawn" "'cuz my computer manages the watering profile and the mower is a robot!"

Confrontation 7 years, 5 months ago

I'm sure good ol' grandpa waited until marriage. Well, unless you count those times during the war....but, it doesn't count if you pay for it.

davidnta 7 years, 5 months ago

I'm personal shocked that these college students are having sex in the privacy of their rooms... (in a sarcastic tone meant to make this column sound ridiculous)

And what was your generation doing during their late teens and early twenties? I'm sure people were being studious and getting an college education like 30% of this population has done. No, I'm sure people were getting married at 17 or 18 and having sex like people are today (only without the unnecessary committment required for such a relationship) and working in a coal mine.

tangential_reasoners_anonymous 7 years, 5 months ago

"... working in a coal mine."

"How long can this go on?"

Godot 7 years, 5 months ago

1969, maybe the spring of 1970; that is when the rules changed and men and women (note that I did not say boys and girls) were allowed to share dorms, not rooms, at KU. So much social progression has occurred since then, I think that date should be recorded in the annals of the record of the improvement in human relations and the enlightenment of the human condition as promoted by the administration of the University of Kansas.

A generation, a single generation. That is all it takes.

Godot 7 years, 5 months ago

It is not a fine line, but a vast ravine, that separates the policy that prohibits cohabitation of students on college campii and one that openly encourages the practice.

Students will do what they will to satisfy their hormanal and emotional urges. They will. Really. They will be very proactive and creative.

Why should the university deprive their students of this delicious deception by telling them it is okay to have a partner stay, overnight, in a dorm room.

And, by he way, if it is not okay to funk the air with second hand smoke, shouldn't it be equally as bad to funk the air in a dorm room with second hand spunk?

laughingatallofu 7 years, 5 months ago

I must admit that I thoroughly enjoyed the posts on this LTE---even the one from the yahoo trying to make this a liberal/conservative issue. It was a refreshing change from all of the name-calling and ugliness that normally pervades these forums. We owe Mr. Neil W. Dodge a debt of gratitude. I hope that he writes in again with more things that have been brought to his attention. Or---maybe the LJW could make him a "roving reporter". I cant wait to find out what happens when teenagers go the the movies and the lights are dimmed!

ontheotherhand 7 years, 5 months ago

Let's just hope that the young men and women who are shacking up together in the dorms got more than an "abstinence-only" lecture in their high school Sex Education classes. :)

black_butterfly 7 years, 5 months ago

Agnostick, Thanks for posting the policy. It really isn't that bad of a policy. I wonder if the grandfather actually read the policy or just went by some "hearsay". The guests are to be registered with picture I.D. and accompanied by their host when not in the room. That seems pretty reasonable. Any RESIDENT who has a problem with guests can report it. College students are going to have sex if they want. There is nothing that Grandparents, parents or RA's can do about it. Atleast they will be in the safety of their own dorm room and not out on the streets trying to check into a seedy motel or driving out into the country to do something in a car. These are young consenting adults who pay some (if not all) of their own college expenses and deserve to be treated like adults, not kids at summer camp. If the grandfather is worried about his granddaughter than he should pay for her to live in her own apartment and buy a chastity belt. I know it is hard for parents and grandparents to "let go". When I was a KU student back in the 80's, the problem wasn't the fact that people of the opposite sex spent the night, but that roommates did not respect each other and had boyfriends spend the night with their roommates in the room. Sometimes the girls would get up and go to class leaving the boyfriend in the room with the sleeping roommate! As long as the policy is followed and room mates work things out and respect each other, I don't see the problem.

tangential_reasoners_anonymous 7 years, 5 months ago

"If the grandfather is worried about his granddaughter than he should... buy a chastity belt."

I take it that this would be an accessory designed by Ms. Bono?

thusspokezarathustra 7 years, 5 months ago

Next they'll be sharing malts & having dances where everyone takes off their shoes!

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