Archive for Sunday, January 29, 2006

Julie Cowdin shares her journey through poetry

January 29, 2006

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Julie participated in Lawrence Memorial Hospital's writing workshop, "Your Life is Your Life: Writing for Hope and Healing." "I was the Edgar Allan Poe of the group," Julie says, laughing.

To My Body

You are a warrior

A pink ribbon pinned on your chest is your medal of honor, your purple heart

You are a warrior

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Julie Cowdin, 36, carries this photo, which shows her without hair, as a reminder of tougher times when she was undergoing chemotherapy for breast cancer. Because she tested positive for the cancer gene BRCA 2, she underwent a double mastectomy and a hysterectomy on her 35th birthday.

Life anew at thirty-six

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Your battle scars reflect a newfound wisdom about life and death

You are a warrior

You know the true meaning of courage



Myself ...

I am generally polite but I don't have to be

It's OK to be angry - was never said to me

Cancer stopped by to say - You're living your life the wrong kind of way

So I met myself and got mad

I never realized the blessings I had



I want to tell you how beautiful you are :

When you are completely exposed

Robbed of all things feminine

No hair

No breasts

No reproductive organs

Beauty is then allowed to take on its true form :

Strength

Forgiveness

Guts

Determination



Grief

I see you out there - outside of my window

I know it's cold and windy and raining - and you'd like to come inside

We have so much to discuss

But you frighten me.

I've seen others let you in for afternoon tea and you never leave.

You have the ability to outgrow your hostess by feasting upon her pain.



I Am Never Alone

I am never alone

You heard the words - "you have cancer"

before I did

I am never alone

You were afraid before I was

I am never alone

You cried rivers before I did

I am never alone

You once had poison running through your veins

I am never alone

You were bald once too

I am never alone

You've had the same surgeries

I am never alone

You've tried to soothe your burning flesh

I am never alone

You were beautiful, loving, gracious,

living survivors before I was.

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