To the editor:

In the tradition of Jonathan Swift’s “A Modest Proposal,” I should like to proffer a few solutions to the current problem of funding schools in our state – in order to protect our God-given right to spend our money on big houses and SUVs rather than on the education of our children.

1. Gov. Sebelius has “proposed” that we rely on increased gambling casino revenues to relieve the taxpayers’ burden for educational purposes. I “propose” further exploitation of Kansas by the establishment of a number of state-run bordellos (for both males and females) taxed heavily for “educational” purposes.

2. Kansans should more strongly support the recruiting efforts of the armed forces in order to impose the American way of life or other cultures. This will serve two purposes: at first, to remove those surly, back-talking and unkempt teenagers off the streets and secondly, to allow the federal government to assume the financial responsibility of educating young Kansans.

3. Pursue the proposal to place stickers on textbooks explaining that evolution is only a theory. This should provoke intelligent high school students to move to another state, thus costing us less for education.

Robert E. Anderson,

Lawrence