One of my family’s favorite games — after “Pick on the Kitty,” “Who Can be the Quietest?” and “Let’s Kick Daddy in a Sensitive Spot! Again!” — is, “Is It Or Isn’t It Irony?” OK, ours might not be a normal family. But awhile back, after noticing my two kids ...

Her name was Emily, and, to be honest, had I seen her cruising down Mass. Street or hanging out in front of Hy-Vee, I probably wouldn’t have given her a second glance. Emily just wasn’t my “type.” I prefer ’em lean and sleek and maybe a little racey, and Emily was none of those ...

For as long as I can remember, I had this ugly growth on my left-rear hip. It wasn’t particularly large — bigger than a mole, smaller than an arm or leg — or grotesquely colored or anything, but it just didn’t belong. I generally don’t go around flashing my hip, so it wasn’t ...

I’m a huge fan of the Urban Dictionary. Sometimes, I’ll be absolutely uplifted, utterly convinced there’s just too much good in the world. When I think life’s all rainbows and sweetness and light, I’ll point my Web browser to urbandictionary.com, and I’ll be exposed to such ...

I hate to admit it, but I think I sort of led my wife on a little bit over the weekend. No, not like THAT. We were downtown, and, out of nowhere, I mentioned I was thinking about buying a new pair of pants. You should have seen her face light up. It was almost as if I had said I was ...

I was riding to racquetball the other day, and the memory of a commercial popped into my head. The spot — which played ad nauseum on my favorite radio station — was for a soft drink. In it, the pitchmen “secretly placed a microphone” in a curmudgeon’s noggin. As he sipped the ...