Our Thanksgiving day crowd this year will be small. As in minuscule. Just Mr. Meat and Potatoes, myself and his mother. The baby will have to sniff turkey from afar and dream of Thanksgivings to come.

Still, I insist on doing a whole turkey. You see, I am not a big fan of turkey, but I am even less of a fan of white meat. If I have to have turkey, it’s gonna be a drumstick. So, I’m cooking a whole turkey for three people. I bought the smallest turkey I could find, which was 13 pounds, and I’m sure there were smaller ones in the world somewhere but I was at Wal-Mart (at 6 a.m. on a Saturday morning, for crying out loud) and they had turkeys for 40 cents a pound, so I went ahead and pulled the trigger.

I am okay with my 13-pound turkey, though. I am okay with it, because of what I can do with it afterward. I’ve said before that I’m not a big fan of the traditional Thanksgiving meal, but I can’t tell you how much I LOVE messing up that turkey after the fact. It is my mission, my raison d’etre, to find obscure and unexpected ways to use up leftover turkey for weeks after Thanksgiving has been forgotten.

Start by portioning out your leftover turkey into 3 or 4 cup bags, so you can whip just the right amount of turkey out of the freezer at any later date for a quick lunch or dinner.

I usually make this first dish, like, right after Thanksgiving, because it’s my favorite and I JUST CAIN’T SAY NO.

Curried Turkey Salad

3 C leftover turkey, cubed
1 apple (I like fujis)
1/4 C chopped walnuts
1/4 C dried cranberries
2 T chopped green onion
1/2 C mayo
1/3 C plain yogurt
2 T hot curry (or however much you can tolerate)
1 T lemon juice
1 tsp minced garlic
pinch salt
cracked black pepper

All you have to do is stir this up. No heating of ovens (after roasting that turkey, I don’t want to heat an oven for days after Thanksgiving), very little chopping. You can serve it on a croissant, or, if you are trying to squeeze back into your pants, just on a lettuce cup. So flavorful, so pretty. And you’ll barely recognize that turkey that made you so sleepy and full the day before.

Everyone always makes turkey soup after thanksgiving, and I agree, that turkey carcass is like gold in terms of making fantastic, better than you-know-what stock. But seriously, anyone can make a plain old turkey/noodle soup. Let’s do one better.

Make your stock, however you make stock. I’m not in the mood to do a stock tutorial. There are a million of them online, like this one, which also comes with a good traditional turkey soup recipe, if you MUST go that way.

So once you have your stock, you can really play with it. My sister and I agree that we’d eat Mexican food every day of the week if they’d let us, so of course I’d prefer to make my turkey into some sort of Mexican Tortilla Soup, which is zingier and more fun all around than the regular kind. Mostly because it gets served with a margarita and probably some fresh guacamole. There is little I wouldn’t do for fresh guacamole.

This recipe is also healthy, quick and easy, with little prep or clean up, and that’s what we’re all about after we’ve wrecked our kitchens and our thighs with the mashed potatoes and pie.

Turkey Tortilla Soup

4 C turkey stock
2 C water
1 can diced green chiles
3 C leftover turkey, shredded
4 corn tortillas
3 T olive oil
1 can enchilada sauce (or you could make your own, but why?)
1 tsp cayenne pepper
1 C black beans
1 C corn
2 cloves garlic, minced
dash of hot sauce – we like Frank’s Red Hot
2 limes (one for juice, one for garnish)
salt and pepper to taste

4 corn tortillas
3 T olive oil

Step 1) Dump everything except the olive oil, tortillas, and one lime into your best stock pot.

Step 2) Let it simmer for as long as you can stand it, over medium heat.

Step 3) Just before serving, cut the tortillas into strips and fry in the olive oil. Serve soup topped with tortillas, a lime wedge, and some fresh cilantro. And a dollop of sour cream, if you don’t care about your thighs.

There are many other applications rattling around in my head, but I haven’t tried them yet. Like, what about a buffalo and bleu wrap, in a spinach tortilla, with turkey instead of fried chicken? What about a breakfast casserole or an omelet? It ALMOST makes me think I love turkey. Almost.

Here’s hoping you get the drumstick and the good end of the wishbone.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!