It's Bad Poetry Day - what you got to say? | Schoolhouse talk / LJWorld.com

Posted by Lindsey Slater August 18, 2009 at 2:21 p.m.

It's Bad Poetry Day - what you got to say?

So, I stumbled upon the the worst poetry in Chicago and it's pretty terrible. The first one is about Oprah and it's hysterical. Turns out today is Bad Poetry Day!

I want your worst poetry. You can email me or just post your worst in the comments. I promise to read them all and post some of my favorite examples of the worst poems you can conjure up. Make your high school poetry teacher cringe.

Here's mine (brace yourself):
Oh, Darnell Jackson
How I love your action
Running up and down the court
You're such a good sport
You started at KU
Oh, the things you would do
Like becoming a national champ
And heading off to the Cavalier's camp
Not only can you ball
Your heart is as big as Fraser Hall
Supporting the Boys and Girls Club
You're never one to snub
So my bad poem is for you
My favorite number, 32
Forever you'll be my favorite big man
To Darnell Jackson, Love your number one fan.

Wow, I even amazed myself on that one. Show me your stuff! Go, bad poetry, go!

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AlfVenison (Alf Venison) says…

The Sunday poetry showcase in the arts and entertainment section of the paper usually provides a sample of bad verse. I guess you could say that in Lawrence every Sunday is Bad Poetry Day.
August 18, 2009 at 2:35 p.m.
RoeDapple (anonymous) says…

To help this old heart,
Keep on tickin'

I quit goin'
To KF Chicken.

Smokin' Cigs,
I must agree,

Soon would be the,
Demise of me.

I've given up
Most of my vice,

Cause after all,
You don't live twice!

- - -*RoeDapple* - - -
August 18, 2009 at 2:48 p.m.
Irish (Leslie Swearingen) says…

I like football,
I like tee,
I like coffee,
Don't like tea.
I like Colt 45,
In the bottle,
Or in the can,
I will take it,
Any way I can.

Well, it rhymes.
Yours is much better, Roe!
August 18, 2009 at 3:03 p.m.
consumer1 (anonymous) says…

Heaven help me if you can
I lost my virginity
to a man

He was ugly
quite a fright
so I waited til near midnight

He kissed my lips
and said goodbye
while his nose poked in my eye

I shouted out with agony
as his car key scratched my knee.

He lept to his feet
and comenced to runnin
cause he thought my pa was gunnin.

He hit the door in seconds flat
and left my laying there,
...that dirty rat.

con1
August 18, 2009 at 4:19 p.m.
zettapixel (anonymous) says…

"Please Flush Only Poop, Pee, and T.P."

A sign put up in the bathroom after someone clogged up our toilet.
August 18, 2009 at 4:21 p.m.
walkingonwater (anonymous) says…

Will sex be great when I'm 98?

It might be, but I won't participate.

Nipsey Russell, 1978
August 18, 2009 at 4:30 p.m.
jonas_opines (anonymous) says…

Sarah Palin Sarah Palin
Oh and Michael Vick
Michael Jackson dies
Bob Novak gets the stick

Wild dogs in Georgia
Pregnant moms and SUVs
Al Gore's carbon footprint
Don't cut down the trees

Anger over taxes
Anger over wealth
Anger over anything
That has to do with health

Another day on ljworld
Fishing for debris
Can't get this kind of comedy
Anywhere on TV
August 18, 2009 at 4:43 p.m.
schula (anonymous) says…

You guys write good "bad poetry"! Thanks for all the laughs!
August 18, 2009 at 4:51 p.m.
lawthing (anonymous) says…

so many many posters
some I admit quite musing
and boy the heat turns up
when a poster feels their loosing!

LJWorld you give me
that added laugh a day
If not because of the story
then what the posters had to say!

Yea I keep cum'n back
You got me on your hook
the stories and the posters
make me take that second look!
August 19, 2009 at 12:56 a.m.