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It's Bad Poetry Day - what you got to say?

So, I stumbled upon the the worst poetry in Chicago and it's pretty terrible. The first one is about Oprah and it's hysterical. Turns out today is Bad Poetry Day!

I want your worst poetry. You can email me or just post your worst in the comments. I promise to read them all and post some of my favorite examples of the worst poems you can conjure up. Make your high school poetry teacher cringe.

Here's mine (brace yourself):
Oh, Darnell Jackson
How I love your action
Running up and down the court
You're such a good sport
You started at KU
Oh, the things you would do
Like becoming a national champ
And heading off to the Cavalier's camp
Not only can you ball
Your heart is as big as Fraser Hall
Supporting the Boys and Girls Club
You're never one to snub
So my bad poem is for you
My favorite number, 32
Forever you'll be my favorite big man
To Darnell Jackson, Love your number one fan.

Wow, I even amazed myself on that one. Show me your stuff! Go, bad poetry, go!

Comments

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  1. AlfVenison (Alf Venison) says…

    The Sunday poetry showcase in the arts and entertainment section of the paper usually provides a sample of bad verse. I guess you could say that in Lawrence every Sunday is Bad Poetry Day.

  2. RoeDapple (anonymous) says…

    To help this old heart,
    Keep on tickin'

    I quit goin'
    To KF Chicken.

    Smokin' Cigs,
    I must agree,

    Soon would be the,
    Demise of me.

    I've given up
    Most of my vice,

    Cause after all,
    You don't live twice!

    - - -*RoeDapple* - - -

  3. Irish (Leslie Swearingen) says…

    I like football,
    I like tee,
    I like coffee,
    Don't like tea.
    I like Colt 45,
    In the bottle,
    Or in the can,
    I will take it,
    Any way I can.

    Well, it rhymes.
    Yours is much better, Roe!

  4. consumer1 (anonymous) says…

    Heaven help me if you can
    I lost my virginity
    to a man

    He was ugly
    quite a fright
    so I waited til near midnight

    He kissed my lips
    and said goodbye
    while his nose poked in my eye

    I shouted out with agony
    as his car key scratched my knee.

    He lept to his feet
    and comenced to runnin
    cause he thought my pa was gunnin.

    He hit the door in seconds flat
    and left my laying there,
    ...that dirty rat.

    con1

  5. zettapixel (anonymous) says…

    "Please Flush Only Poop, Pee, and T.P."

    A sign put up in the bathroom after someone clogged up our toilet.

  6. walkingonwater (anonymous) says…

    Will sex be great when I'm 98?

    It might be, but I won't participate.

    Nipsey Russell, 1978

  7. jonas_opines (anonymous) says…

    Sarah Palin Sarah Palin
    Oh and Michael Vick
    Michael Jackson dies
    Bob Novak gets the stick

    Wild dogs in Georgia
    Pregnant moms and SUVs
    Al Gore's carbon footprint
    Don't cut down the trees

    Anger over taxes
    Anger over wealth
    Anger over anything
    That has to do with health

    Another day on ljworld
    Fishing for debris
    Can't get this kind of comedy
    Anywhere on TV

  8. schula (anonymous) says…

    You guys write good "bad poetry"! Thanks for all the laughs!

  9. lawthing (anonymous) says…

    so many many posters
    some I admit quite musing
    and boy the heat turns up
    when a poster feels their loosing!

    LJWorld you give me
    that added laugh a day
    If not because of the story
    then what the posters had to say!

    Yea I keep cum'n back
    You got me on your hook
    the stories and the posters
    make me take that second look!