I really thought I'd get more submissions than I did for bad poetry. Thought the commenters would be all over this one.

Hands down, this was my favorite of the entries I got. If you're a regular on the comment boards, the author will look familiar.

"I wake up all too often
and have to leave the bed.
I'd much prefer to lie there
and rest my weary head.

I come to this recliner
not wanting to partake
of any more bombardments
the Internet can make.

Bad feet will not consider
a trip to the TV,
to change another movie
and I really need to pee.

So once again you'll find me
sitting where you read me last,
at least I have not sat so long
my skin is sticking fast.

That WOULD be just the ending,
for you to read about my fate,
“What happened to Old Multi…
haven't heard from her of late?”

They found her where she always was,
her mouse in hand, eyes crusted.
The URL read by the cop
“One millionth comment posted”

• Multidisciplinary, Aug 18th 2009"

Oh, man. Good stuff.

I also really like this one:
"Sarah Palin Sarah Palin
Oh and Michael Vick
Michael Jackson dies
Bob Novak gets the stick

Wild dogs in Georgia
Pregnant moms and SUVs
Al Gore's carbon footprint
Don't cut down the trees

Anger over taxes
Anger over wealth
Anger over anything
That has to do with health

Another day on ljworld
Fishing for debris
Can't get this kind of comedy
Anywhere on TV
- jonas_opines

Feel free to add more bad poetry below. Get creative!

So, I stumbled upon the the worst poetry in Chicago and it's pretty terrible. The first one is about Oprah and it's hysterical. Turns out today is Bad Poetry Day!

I want your worst poetry. You can email me or just post your worst in the comments. I promise to read them all and post some of my favorite examples of the worst poems you can conjure up. Make your high school poetry teacher cringe.

Here's mine (brace yourself):
Oh, Darnell Jackson
How I love your action
Running up and down the court
You're such a good sport
You started at KU
Oh, the things you would do
Like becoming a national champ
And heading off to the Cavalier's camp
Not only can you ball
Your heart is as big as Fraser Hall
Supporting the Boys and Girls Club
You're never one to snub
So my bad poem is for you
My favorite number, 32
Forever you'll be my favorite big man
To Darnell Jackson, Love your number one fan.

Wow, I even amazed myself on that one. Show me your stuff! Go, bad poetry, go!

I happen to have a television right above my desk and I try to keep it on some sort of cable news network. I glanced up during a lull in my day and saw the anchor talking about I Used To Believe, a Web site dedicated to adults sharing their most ridiculous childhood beliefs. It's pretty quality.

Here are some of my favorites: "I used to think the local newscasters could see me, so my mom would put on the news when she had to do house work because I behaved myself, in fear the newspeople would tell on me." (By the way, that is TOTALLY true. I will tell on you. Granted, I anchor at 10 p.m. on Sundays, so I'm guessing there aren't many badly behaved kids still up to tattle on.)

"I found my mother's 'Alien' card when I was 5 years old. I actually believed my mom was an alien, until I finally asked her and she explained that she was an immigrant."

Then there's a list of some common ones:

• If you swallow a seed, a plant will grow in your stomach.

• Chocolate milk comes from brown cows.

• Thunder is God bowling (totally guilty of believing that one).

One big belief I had when I was little was that everyone bought their children when they were babies and picked them up in a special store. My younger brother and I were adopted. I was 5 when we went and got him, and I asked if we had a receipt and could return him. Turns out it doesn't work like that.

What are some of your childhood beliefs? Anything you tell your children to believe that isn't exactly true?

There's quite a few events going on in the next few weeks in Lawrence public schools, so I thought I'd put a bug in your ear about some of them.

Tonight at 7 p.m. the Lawrence Boys and Girls Club is hosting a fundraiser/student film premiere of their original work titled "Welcome to L.A." It's $5 per person and will be shown at Liberty Hall.

Today is also National Nurses Day. I know I tried to avoid the nurse's office as much as possible as a kid, but these men and women work hard and try not to let your children get away with faking it. Say thanks.

This Saturday, the Free State High Greenhouse Science Class will be selling the plants and flowers they've been growing in the greenhouse on the school's campus. The sale goes from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. and will be in the greenhouse, which is on the southwest corner of the campus. It's the second annual plant sale for Free State.

There have been quite a few administrative and school retirements, so the district will be honoring both with retirement receptions. The first is on May 13 from 4 to 6 p.m. for retiring superintendent Randy Weseman, deputy superintendent Bruce Passman and COO Mary Rodriguez. The public is welcome and refreshments will be served. It will be at district headquarters, 110 McDonald Drive.

The recognition reception for 30 retiring teachers and staff will be on May 20 starting at 4 p.m. It will also be at district headquarters.

And, finally, if you've made it this far, the district has prepared a list of potential cuts that could be made if the Kansas state legislature decides to cut the base state aid per pupil again. The public is being asked for their input on what they would cut or would save. Email suggestions to suggestionbox@usd497.org.

Whew. Now I just have to prepare myself for the next few weeks of complete business -- high school graduation is upon us!

So, Lawrence celebrated Earth Day this weekend, but really Earth Day is tomorrow.

How much do you know about the environment? Check out this Connections Academy Quizbowl Challenge, which will put you to the test. Really, it's geared toward kids, so maybe see if your kids know more than you. Even I've seen a big difference between the curriculum of my day (which wasn't that long ago) and what the kiddies are learning in Lawrence public schools.

Take a peek back at the first ever Earth Day with pictures done by National Geographic called The First Earth Day: Bell-Bottoms and Gas Masks.

And as a teaser for tomorrow — I'll be heading to Prairie Park and Sunset Hill schools to get in on their Earth Day action.

Here's a cute (and super kid friendly) video about the history of Earth Day.

What are you doing to celebrate Earth Day?

Are you a teacher? Have an awesome idea for your kids but don't have the extra money to do it? U.S. Cellular is here to help.

It launched its "Calling All Teachers" campaign, which will funnel $1 million (how very Dr. Evil of them) to teachers across the country for classroom materials and educational experiences for their students.

Between now and Teacher Appreciation Week, which is May 4-8, the wireless company wants teachers to post requests on Donorschoose.org. The Web site helps public school teachers find money for class projects that go over their limited budgets.

Past winners in Kansas include a microscope and science supplies for $436, athletic equipment for a Special Olympics program costing $411, and a $141 mastering math games library.

The program is open to all public school teachers in the markets where U.S. Cellular does business, which, of course, includes Lawrence.

Donorschoose.org has gotten more than $30 million in funding for teachers during its nine years in existence.

So, get your project funded today! And if any Lawrence teachers cash in on this offer, you must let me know so we can do a story on the amazing things going on in our local schools.

I know I've raved about Lawrence High's college prep engineering class before and how they win everything and could design their way out of a cardboard box, but to show off all their skills, they need to make it to the Global Construction Challenge in Knoxville, Tenn. They swept up at KC regionals after a lot of practice.

They're having a fundraiser. They're selling themselves. No, not like that. They're selling their manual labor skills in an auction at 7 p.m. March 9 in the LHS cafeteria. If you purchase a student, you can get up to six hours of work of out them!

Here are just a few of the kids you can select from (I'm picking guys I've interviewed and that I know are awesome):
- Tyler Click, a senior, likes cars, engines, sports, music and food. He wants to study mechanical engineering in college.
- Tyler Bailey, a senior, likes baseball, football, bowling and music. He wants to go to KU to study aerospace engineering. (And is a really good sport when you ask him to call you stupid on TV. Just a side note.)
- Dylan Shmalberg, a senior, likes cycling, sports, cars, food and traveling. He'll study mechanical engineering at KU.

I mean, if I didn't live in a teeny tiny apartment and actually needed things to be fixed, these would be the kids to do it. Plus, they're raising money to get down to Knoxville to show off their skills at a national level.

If you can't be at the auction but want to help build the dreams of engineering kids (get it? Build their dreams?), you can donate to LHS Engineering, c/o Charlie Lauts, Lawrence High School, 1901 La., Lawrence, KS 66046.

On Friday, Kansas Commissioner of Education Alexa Posny told school districts that the federal stimulus package includes about $100 billion for education.

But, the money won't just rain down from above — it's targeted to specific areas. Here's the breakdown:
- $10 billion for Title I
- $12.2 billion for IDEA, the Individuals with Disabilities Act
- $250 million for the state longitudinal data systems program, which collects data to improve student learning
- $3 billion for school improvement programs
- $53.6 billion for state fiscal stabilization, which includes $5 billion for state innovation and incentive grants