“Facebook is the worst thing that has ever happened.”

Those were the words out of my husband’s mouth this week. As much as it pains me to say it, he’s got a point. Facebook is the devil. It has given a megaphone to people who seem to have been born without a filter. I’m not necessarily talking about a cursing and dirty topics filter (although there are some that do need that), I’m talking about the normal social interaction filter that would usually keep people from talking about topics that other people don’t care about.

Think about it. Would you walk up to 90 of your friends in a room, hold up a photo of last night’s dinner, and then proceed to tell them all about it?

Exactly. But every evening, there it is on my friggin’ news feed.

You know who’s the worst on it? We are. Parents are some of the most complained about posters on Facebook. There’s even a website devoted to calling them out.

It’s hard though, right? Our children are the most adorable humans ever created. They are our favorite people in the world and therefore everything they do is amazing. Therefore, we SHARE IT ALL. Too much, in fact.

I surveyed some of my child-free friends as well as fellow parents to find out just which Facebook posts from parents are the most annoying to others. These are the winners:

• Potty training updates:
No. Just no. The only people who care about whether or not little Suzy went poo poo or pee pee in the potty are you, her father, and maybe Grandma. Everyone else is pretty content missing out on those nuggets of info. Also, it is NEVER okay to post a picture of these events to Facebook. You would think this is something that wouldn’t need to be said. Again, Facebook removes filters.

• Naked photos after age 1:
I’m with ya. I think there is nothing cuter in this world than a naked baby/toddler tush. In fact, almost every night I depants HJ and let her run a lap around the house just so I can giggle at her tiny baby butt. However, that’s where the buck stops. There are too many pervs online and future teenagers will have enough issues on their own without having to hate their parents for also posting naked photos of them online. Naked photos before age 1 though, all bets are off. Those little butter balls are still “baby cute” and rolls need to be seen.

http://wellcommons.com/users/photos/2013/nov/20/264891/

Am I right?

• Monthly belly/baby updates:
Recording monthly changes in your pregnancy and milestones in baby’s first year are important. They are wonderful memories and totally awesome… to you. Your basketball-sized belly is adorably huge. And little Joe looks precious in that onesie with a sticker declaring his age in months, but we ALL don’t need a new photo every month. You know what we would probably enjoy? A montage of all of these photos as one image at the end of the year/pregnancy so we can see the progression in one image. That would be fun for all.

• Pushy agendas:
Cloth diapers are best! Vaccines are poison! This is why you shouldn’t feed your kids corn syrup! Seen any of these kinds of posts lately? Yeeeeeah. This kind of goes back to last week’s post about fueling the Mommy Wars. Facebook is a breeding ground for mommy battles and so many parents use the social network to continuously broadcast their reasons for their latest parenting choice. I’m totally guilty of this one. I get a little click-happy when I read an article or blog post that makes me say “Hell YES,” and then I share the bejesus out of it. I’m a pusher. Nobody likes a pusher, right Cady Heron?

• An update about everything, every minute:
This was the number one answer across the board. Facebook baby/kid saturation was the biggest gripe from parents and non-parents alike. Yes, your kid is cute. Yes, your kid is hilarious. But we don’t need a play-by-play of Sammy’s life. Posting several photos a day, constantly updating the world on every cough, and announcing tonight’s bedtime story is just… stop. Stop right now. You’re done.

What Facebook parent updates drive you crazy?