Project Runway Season 5, Episode 13 – Finale part 1

One episode left, my friends, until Season 4 winner Christian can pass on his Project Runway crown to someone supremely less talented he. Huzzah.And although we don’t know who will win – though I think I have a pretty good guess – we do know it’s going to be a woman.!Jerell, the lone man standing in the final four, went down in flames that not even the mammoth amounts of fabric on his final dress could squelch. But really, it was his own overly ornate inferno that he built long ago which hurt him the most. He never learned how to edit down his clothes, and the judges didn’t help him much either, never really giving him heck for his editing eye or for the fact that his garments constantly looked rumpled or sloppy. One would think he would figure that out on his own as the show started airing episodes well before he returned for fashion week, and he could have flipped on the TV and seen his errors, but apparently when one is creating a Bryant Park fashion line and a wedding dress, there’s no time to watch yourself on TV.Jerell’s final outfit was a wedding dress that looked like it was dipped alternately in soot and the kind of bronzer used to immortalize baby shoes before being topped off blooming hair plugs. Indeed, Michael Kors said Jerell’s choice of hairstyle made the model look like she had a flower pot on her head. Therefore, apparently, Jerell’s ideas of “opulent” and “regal” are equal to the judge’s remarks of “garish” and “flower pot head.” Not exactly something you’d find in a thesaurus.Also struggling was Korto, whose dress looked like a some sort of figure made out of maize husks and rolled in ash before being weighted down by a beaded neckline. It just wasn’t flattering, and was way overdone, which is weird because Korto’s strengths tend to be her flattering cuts and ability to self-edit. Maybe nerves got the best of her, because she definitely smacked the bar set for the final challenge, rather than heading over or under. Heidi, always direct in her dislike, summed it up quite nicely when she simply said “I would not like to be the bride” in that dress. Yikes.Meanwhile, Leanne’s wavy wedding dress was fantastic. And Kenley’s poofy, feathery wedding dress was also just gorgeous – even if it was compared heavily to something Alexander McQueen recently put on the runway. Smartly, Kenley didn’t claim not to pay attention to other designers, which is what she did the last time they said her outfit looked like someone else’s, and kind of kept her mouth shut. In any case, they were clearly the best and were left to awkwardly hug in the green room, their tickets to Bryant Park stamped.!Meanwhile, Jerell and Korto sweated it out on the runway, each clearly kind of mad that they’d gotten themselves into such a mess when they clearly though Kenley should have gone home last week. But, Jerell’s luck finally ran out and Korto, who had been consistently good all season was allowed to move on, making an all-female final three for the first time.And it was the right choice. Not because I’ve been a fan of Korto’s for the past 13 episodes, but because her collection, which the judges didn’t see, was far better than Jerell’s. If the judges saw “garish” in his wedding gown, they would have seen it times 12 in his runway presentation.So, we’ve got three girls in the top three. But what’s sad is that no matter how talented Kenley, Korto and Leanne are, they can’t hold a candle to a few of the women who did not win in other Project Runway seasons, including Laura Bennett and my personal favorite, Uli. And arguably, those two losers are even better than the only female winner to date, season 2’s Chloe.As for which one of these women will be lucky enough to win the most talentless season of Project Runway yet, my money is on Leanne. As much as I’ve loved Korto all season, I’m not feeling the same warmth with her collection as I did with the clothes she made in the challenges. And Kenley’s collection of painted-on frocks looked a bit discombobulated to me in this week’s preview. Yet, Leanne’s work flows and clearly looks like it goes together. It’s just plainly pretty, and who doesn’t want to look pretty?A few final thoughts: – Jerell, I hope you get your life’s retrospective at the Met when you’re 80, my friend. Just do me a favor and wear sleeves when you’re an octogenarian, please. – Korto has some mad drumming skills. – Kenley may be annoying, but she does have a really cute apartment and an adorable grandma. There’s no denying her that! – Leanne’s tandem bike ride with Tim Gunn was pure comedy, and I’m sure his heart still races whenever he sees her because he’s afraid she’s going to make him do it again. – If Leanne doesn’t win, who will and why?