If you could create a law, what would it be? / LJWorld.com

Asked at Massachusetts Street on August 4, 2011

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“I’d create a law to eliminate all the stupid laws.”

— Stephanie Haskett, journalism major, San Diego

“I would make it to where bodies have to be cremated. I think cemeteries are a waste of land.”

— Heather Jackson, student, Lawrence

“I’d like for Kansas to be made to stop working on roads unnecessarily.”

— Josh Jackson, Walmart employee, Lawrence

“I’d change all of them.”

— Justin Parr, audio engineer, Lawrence

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jonas_opines 1 year, 9 months ago

Well, they could just enjoy how everybody flips out about their post on a daily basis, which I can't claim to understand at all.

sulliedotcom 1 year, 9 months ago

I find this comment highly offensive.

ljwhirled 1 year, 9 months ago

This would be pretty easy to script in perl. Since the story is posted around the same time, you could grab the RSS feed and automate the login/post.

vertigo 1 year, 9 months ago

Life in prison and no access to the internet for "First" posters.

riverdrifter 1 year, 9 months ago

Nice try, Thuja but this is ku_law's life. It's all he/she/it exists for. Must suck to be ku_law.

My law would legalize marijuana use, with some limitations. And I don't even smoke the stuff. Anymore.

riverdrifter 1 year, 9 months ago

Tie for first would be that a woman's body is private between her and her doctor. Any politician who messes with this...

riverdrifter 1 year, 9 months ago

Wait a minute, I'm catching on now: By law: Roundtrip tickets to Gatwick: $200.

The finest single malt: By law: 5$ per half-gallon.

Away we go...

Like. Maybe the flood of expensive, frivolous, "issue" legislation pouring out of statehouses would finally stop. (There are some, however, that skirt the line closely enough that I would suspend such penalties. Roe V. Wade would have never happened in such a climate and the Supreme Court is there for a reason.)

misterlee 1 year, 9 months ago

I'd rewrite the income tax laws, making it a very simple graduated flat tax with no exemptions and no deductins. I you make "x," you pay "y." Let's try 5% for each $50K of income. Most of us would pay less, but the government would have more to work with to get things done.

ljwhirled 1 year, 9 months ago

Make it linear rather than table based. This way there is no incentive to try and tweak your income to get it into the next lower tax bracket.

I'd go a step further and use the Federal Reserve to clear all transactions, then take a small percentage of every transaction. Then set up a simple system that forces all transactions to be electronic. Maybe based on cell phone technology with biometric two part authentication.

Check payment and credit cards are both cleared electronically and already make up a majority of transactions.

Whether it is a stock purchase, pay check, doughnut sale, vehicle purchase, or yacht sale, each transaction would pay a very small tax. The rate would be determined by the class of the purchase (i.e. you'd pay a higher tax on a yacht, medium tax on a vehicle, and no tax on staple foods, natural gas, electricity or rent under a certain threshold)

This would eliminate tax cheats. There would be no way to move money from one person to another without paying taxes on it.

Hell, if we just eliminated tax cheats in the current system it would add $4 to $5 Trillion in new revenue to the treasury. http://tinyurl.com/4x9gpq5

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

Multi, put the pipe down and back away slowly. Love ya!

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

I would actually add the words "wall of separation between church and state" to the First Amendment. Despite the fact that there is a ton (and I do mean a ton) of historical evidence of just exactly what Jefferson meant when he wrote the Establishment clause, it would shut up those idiots forever that continually whine that "those words aren't in the Constitution" and would prevent the attempts made, like Texas, of doing an end run around it by banning the study of Jefferson and his life's work. My son, otoh, would normalize and legalize marijuana. Figures :)

H_Lecter 1 year, 9 months ago

Bring back witch burning

vertigo 1 year, 9 months ago

I prefer my wiccans medium rare. Too much cooking makes em tough and hard to swallow.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

Nah. Wiccans just give me heartburn. Now evangelicals, they're tough to swallow.

RoeDapple 1 year, 9 months ago

Capital punishment for habitual cut'n'pasters! And Threaders!

RoeDapple 1 year, 9 months ago

But where would we start?

RoeDapple 1 year, 9 months ago

http://www2.ljworld.com/users/merrill/

RoeDapple 1 year, 9 months ago

Of course not! Not if I get to make the law!

;-)

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

LOL! I originally read this as "gravy optional". I was about to say, "But that's a crime!"

The_Big_B 1 year, 9 months ago

Sunset all laws. Each of them would expire in 5 years unless there is a positive determination that the government intrusion caused by the law is, and continues to be, justified by some real need.

Government should have to prove to us the need for every law we have put on the books. If they cannot do it, that law should go away on its own.

boxers_or_briefs 1 year, 9 months ago

When laws are outlawed, only outlaws will have laws.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

And your inlaws will be outlaws.

tweetysvoice 1 year, 9 months ago

I would make it against the law to build roundabouts in stupid locations.

killjoy 1 year, 9 months ago

+1,000 FTW

Cant_have_it_both_ways 1 year, 9 months ago

To actually be paying federal income tax to be able to vote.

ljwhirled 1 year, 9 months ago

Yeah, because eliminating the franchise for the poor won't result in a class war.

How about this - the number of votes you get is proportional to your net worth? One vote for every $100,000 in assets.

So bill gates gets 500,000 votes and the 166,000,000 Americans with less than $100K in assets get 0 votes. http://tinyurl.com/439ra8o

Seems fair.

All of this Tea Party talk about founding fathers seems to conveniently forget that the founding fathers worked hard to prevent the establishment of a US aristocracy. Progressive tax policy prevents the rise of an aristocracy. That is a good thing.

kernal 1 year, 9 months ago

Full disclosure of all campaign contributions by any political candidate in the U.S. and no more pork attached to any Congressional bill - none, nada, zilch.

HW 1 year, 9 months ago

Term limits for all politicians.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

+a bajillion.

rockchalker52 1 year, 9 months ago

damn straight!

wmathews 1 year, 9 months ago

In college I did a story on a company that takes cremation remains and turns them into gem stones. Then you wear your dead loved ones as haunted jewelry.

rando1965 1 year, 9 months ago

http://www.evrmemories.com/Cremation-art-people-s/242.htm

have your ashes in the painting.......

snap_pop_no_crackle 1 year, 9 months ago

I'd make it the law that in order to buy a pack of cigaretts, a smoker has to turn in 40 cigarette butts. Every six months the toll goes up by 20. That'd clean up the mess that smokers have been creating the past few decades.

Pastor_Bedtime 1 year, 9 months ago

1st DUI = 3 years no drive. 2nd DUI = never own a car or drive again.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

+a squillion.

verity 1 year, 9 months ago

I always wondered what came after bajillion.

Fossick 1 year, 9 months ago

All women should have to carry their sidearms at all times.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

Or have a Viking funeral. Build a raft and set it and you on fire and float it out to the middle of Clinton Lake. Then everybody can set up their lawn chairs, get drunk and throw their lines in the water.

RETICENT_IRREVERENT 1 year, 9 months ago

Laws smaws

he_who_knows_all 1 year, 9 months ago

A law to make women wait on me 24/7 and be wearing lingerie.

KSChick1 1 year, 9 months ago

you can wear lingerie while the women wait on you without a law to force it into happening....just sayin! and btw....why can't you wait on yourself? pig!

he_who_knows_all 1 year, 9 months ago

"and btw....why can't you wait on yourself? pig!"

Because I have trained the right little lady to wait on me chick.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

When you get around to making the little nooses for them.

rockchalker52 1 year, 9 months ago

I'd abolish the electoral college. Can anybody give any reason why we should keep the thing?

verity 1 year, 9 months ago

Absolutely.

CWGOKU 1 year, 9 months ago

Women must be topless on the weekends

consumer1 1 year, 9 months ago

not all women, just the ones I choose. I have a mother and daughter. There are sum breast left covered.

CWGOKU 1 year, 9 months ago

Agree!

Finnbar1 1 year, 9 months ago

In college I did a story on a company that takes cremation remains and turns them into gem stones. Then you wear your dead loved ones as haunted jewelry.

*we've had a Lindsey sighting***

I wonder if the remains are turned into a specific gem stone based on the personality of the deceased. Cuz if that's the case I would have a LOT of onyx jewelry if I were to do this.

CWGOKU 1 year, 9 months ago

Good night Hollis

eotw33 1 year, 9 months ago

Make cigarettes illegal!

Kontum1972 1 year, 9 months ago

Electing stupid sh*ts to run the city.....

CWGOKU 1 year, 9 months ago

Just enforce the laws we have on the books now.

I would add one that says my kids can't text at the dinner table. And no sales tax on beer Free biscuits and gravy for TOB at any restaraunt of his choosing

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

And '80's hair still worn by women over 40.

consumer1 1 year, 9 months ago

That people who live in Lawrence part time, AKA college students could not vote in local elections. And outlaw croc worn by men or boys.

somedude20 1 year, 9 months ago

everyone here knows that we are all going to die at some point in time, correct? That can be a rather depressing thought so due to this fact, I say that every Friday (or Saturday) becomes the "international day of vices" day when any vice that you may have becomes free and legal and you can do it. drugs, hookers, riverboat gambling, whatever you would like

BlackVelvet 1 year, 9 months ago

Can't you do all that now???

somedude20 1 year, 9 months ago

you can now but it aint legal.

Andini 1 year, 9 months ago

Free beer for days ending in "y"

CWGOKU 1 year, 9 months ago

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Paul R. Getto 1 year, 9 months ago

Require that all dead people be converted into ammunition: For example--- "If you’d like to go out with a bang, Holy Smoke LLC offers to pack your cremated ashes (or those of your loved ones) into ammunition cartridges. You tell them the caliber or gauge, ship the remains to them, and they’ll load the cartridges."

bevy 1 year, 9 months ago

ROFL! You could have the ashes of people you don't like turned into skeet, then go out to the farm and blow 'em out of the sky! LIKE.

cait48 1 year, 9 months ago

I actually had a friend who sort of did this. He was a professional performer at Renaissance Festivals and Faires and went all over the country with his wife touring these places and doing gigs. He died fairly young (late forties) from cancer. At his direction, his wife cremated his remains and sent small amounts of ashes in film canisters to something like 50 different Ren Faires. Each one of them, on their opening day, shot his ashes out of their cannons. The remainder of his ashes were shot up into space ( a la Carl Sagan) by some private space rocket company that's doing that sort of thing.

LadyJ 1 year, 9 months ago

I know someone who has had his dog for many, many years. He plans to have the dog cremated and then have the ashes made into tattoo ink. Then he is going to get his first tattoo with the ink.

mom_of_three 1 year, 9 months ago

new law - you have to pass an American history test to become a politician.

KUnlv13 1 year, 9 months ago

Minimum IQ requirements for procreation, please.

hitme 1 year, 9 months ago

+150

bevy 1 year, 9 months ago

I would pass a law against those ugly throwback bug-eye sunglasses the girls are all wearing these days. They were ugly in the 70s, they're no better now. How long before the Buford T. Justice Sheriff-style reflecting sunglasses come back for guys? What then? Feathered hair, bell bottoms? When will the madness end! On the bright side, my avocado green bath tub is back in style now...

bevy 1 year, 9 months ago

One more - term limits for every elected office in the nation. Period. If your approval rating falls below 75%, you are on probation and get half pay until it goes back up. In other words, hold our reps accountable for their actions and have options in place to smack them upside the head when they get out of line.

giveitsomethought 1 year, 9 months ago

As barbaric as it may sound, I would allow every person the ability to kill one person for free in their lifetime. No one would know if you had used your freebie yet. Maybe if the threat was there, everyone would be a little nicer to each other. Just a thought :-J let the comments fly :-J

rockchalker52 1 year, 9 months ago

Well, if you get that passed, let's get a lethal rumble goin' between Free State & LHS. That way we'll only need one high school. You'd use your freebie for the old school spirit, wouldn't ya, giveit? what in the...? the whole idea sounds like a bad twilight zone episode