I have a tendency to say “yes” to projects, parties, events, endeavors, jobs and crackpot ideas.

This is because of several factors, including my mania, my ego and my belief that I can always squeeze in just one more tiny thing.

Except that I can’t.

I can’t make myself get up in the morning and spend more than five minutes on my hair and makeup. I can’t make myself introduce a “five-minute face” beauty and cleansing routine that I hear so much about.

I’m supposed to be spending five minutes every day doing some sort of relaxation technique (wha?), and five minutes tidying up this or that in some sort of household wreckage prevention system.

I’m supposed to spend five minutes reading to my kids several times a day (this, I usually accomplish), and five minutes doing some sort of oil pulling/gagging routine for my teeth and mouth. And this is only the beginning for the “five-minute” routines that the internet, magazines and newspapers keep insisting I have time for. If I did each of those “it only takes five minutes” things every morning before work, we’d never leave the house.

So here’s what I’ve discovered: It’s not that I don’t want to do extra things and work hard. It’s that I don’t want to do things I don’t want to do. At 41, I have structured my life in such a way that I rarely do things I don’t want to do. Selfish? Maybe. Genius? I think so.

This isn’t to say that I have eschewed all mundane tasks. I still have to do the dishes and wipe up the toothpaste my 5-year-old left in the sink every day. I still shave my legs on occasion and do laundry regularly.

But sometimes, I skip the dishes. And often, the laundry piles up. Because today? I don’t feel like doing the stupid dishes. Tomorrow, I might. And I’d rather do them when I’m feeling inspired about my kitchen than when I’m feeling resentful and exhausted.

It doesn’t mean that at work I don’t have to sometimes do things like look at budgets, which are not my cup of tea. Looking at budgets is right up there with pulling my arm hairs out one by one on the list of things I don’t look forward to. But usually, I can make myself do it if I give myself permission to say, “Not right now — I don’t want to do that now.”

I know I can’t procrastinate forever or we’d all be naked and our bank accounts would be overdrawn, and that would cause me to have to do a lot of things I REALLY don’t want to do. But that permission to say “not right now” is golden.

We live in a world that has taught us that procrastinating is a moral failing akin to animal cruelty, but really it is a coping mechanism, and a good one at that. The freedom to just say “no” to extra things that don’t suit your personality or lifestyle is better than a spa day. Some things are not procrastination, they’re just things we have decided not to take part in, and THAT IS OK.

I’m a 41-year-old wife, and the mother of an 20-month-old and a 5-year-old. I have a more-than-full-time job outside the home, a side-job as a freelance writer, and an obsession with home-cooked food. And I do what I want. I promise you, my family, home and sanity are all better for it.

— Megan Stuke is a wife and a mother of Johnny (5) and Lily (1). By day she works to help children and families at Ballard Community Services, and by night she writes, cooks, cleans (very little) and tries her best to be part of everything Lawrence has to offer.