I realized yesterday that all of my shoes are falling apart. At once. No great surprise, as I am not famous for buying expensive clothes, nor am I famous for buying them often. You can take away my woman card now: I hate shopping.

I even hated it when I was young and thin.

I don’t like spending time in stores, I don’t like dressing rooms, I think trying things on is uncomfortable and wasteful of time I could be spending lolling about or drinking a margarita. There isn’t enough drinking or lolling in shopping. If I have time away from my family, enough to shop, I’m probably going to opt for a pedicure and a trip to that new restaurant with my girlfriends.

So the discovery that my footwear is woefully worn is depressing, not only to my pocketbook but also my psyche. I can’t order shoes online from Old Navy, where I tend to do my seasonal shopping twice a year in one fell swoop. I don’t want to buy Stuff. I really don’t like Stuff and I want less Stuff in my life. Having two small children means that my home is over-run with Stuff because they are very fond of Stuff and people give them new Stuff all the time.

The shoes will have to be purchased, and I will do it in the most efficient, inexpensive way possible. I will go to one store, try on five pairs, buy three of them, be done in 15 minutes, and never look back. This is how I handle most purchases in my life. Sometimes, Stuff happens, and I like to minimize the pain.

If I am going to spend my precious dollars, I want an experience for it. I want a memory, a good time, a bond created. I want to learn, create or consume. Spending money on things that sit in my house or on my body just makes me mad. I look at the Thing and think, “You mean I had one less trip to the zoo with my kids,” or, “You took away from my baby’s college fund.” And then I really hate the Thing, necessary as the Thing might be.

I am on a quest to eliminate. Not only do I want to eliminate wasteful spending, I want to eliminate clutter, frittered time and housecleaning. Theoretically, if my house contains less stuff, there will be less to clean or organize, right? And this will be good for all our brains, right?

Soon, I will have to brave the shoe shopping world. I might need someone to hold my hand, but only if that person will be swift, decisive and frugal in her shopping M.O. Maybe I should just take my husband and kids with me. That, without fail, will make me move quickly through the department store.

My friend Kelsey, who has a nice job and the cash to go with it, proudly tells me about her discount shoes and decade-old car. She is a fellow hater of all things material, and instead is choosing to spend her money on tripping around the country with her significant other at every possible opportunity. She buys little but is rich in experience. She is an inspiration to us all to remember that Jimmy Choos are a sad replacement for a lifetime worth of growth and stories.

— Megan Stuke is a wife and a mother of Johnny (4) and Lily (1). By day she works to help children and families at Ballard Community Services, and by night she writes, cooks, cleans (very little) and tries her best to be part of everything Lawrence has to offer.