Archive for Thursday, January 12, 2012

Prosecutors file aggravated battery charge against woman for Burrito King incident

January 12, 2012


Douglas County prosecutors have charged a 24-year-old Lawrence woman with aggravated battery after an altercation in the Burrito King drive-through lane.

Prosecutors filed the case against April Ann Jones who was arrested early on Jan. 1 after she was accused of battering a woman outside Burrito King, 900 Ill. Police said a 31-year-old Lawrence woman said the fight began when her vehicle rolled and struck the vehicle in front of her.

The victim alleged Jones and another woman then got out of their vehicle and began hitting her. The 31-year-old woman was taken to Lawrence Memorial Hospital for treatment, and police later arrested Jones, who posted $750 bond and was given notice to appear in court Thursday.

Police said at the time they did not find the second suspect.


cardpotato 5 years ago

agree, i would never eat there either

Reuben Turner 5 years ago

i stopped eating there years ago. many years ago ( over 12) and don't plan to go there and eat anytime soon

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

good, now she'll have a 'wrap' sheet, hope she really gets fried so she won't be so saucey next time.

that is, unless she greases somebody's palm and is let off easy. but I don't think she's got a hope of that in a hill of beans.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

thanks RC! it was fun to post. I freely admit that punning is one of my personal weaknesses.

and in full disclosure, I actually like Burrito King's burrito with everything on it, yes ... I know! lol!

kristeniswright87 5 years ago

You really hate women dontcha? Must be really great to be old and cynical and probably single.

kristeniswright87 5 years ago

Just because she had too much to drink that night and made a mistake doesn't mean she is a loser. None of us are saints.

kristeniswright87 5 years ago

Mistakes happen and people feel regret.

bad_dog 5 years ago

Funny that correlation between "mistakes", criminal charges & "regret".

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

Whoa!!! where in heck do you get all that?!?

now you've just tagged yourself on here for life as: immature; vapid; a poor reader for comprehension; and obviously prejudiced. that's the only way you get all that out of my humorous post!

is "87" your birth year or your IQ Kristen?

try rereading when you've calmed down.

I do accept apologies. my suggestion: you post yours on this thread. thanks.

I agree: your BFF needs to fix her anger problems.
were you the other wench in April's car that night who helped in the burrito rage womping? if so, turn yourself in, the police have a special place designatedjust for you* little girly.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

Thanks Bea! if I'd taken more time, I could've had six more puns.

bad_dog 5 years ago

Personally, I thought your burrito puns were kind of cheesy.

Try spicing them up a bit next time. You know, perhaps a little meatier in substance ;-)

Hope I didn't offend Kristen.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

Bad-dog! you sir so obviously hate womyn and are single.

we must get our hands around you to grill you until you fold under pressure.

if you can't stand the heat, get outa the kitchen, or at least do a salsa dance.

bad_dog 5 years ago

Alright gnome. You've foiled my plot. I've bean exposed. Lettuce part on amicable terms.

Didn't the group Men Without Hats have a song called "Salsa Dance" back in the 80's? I could be wrong...

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

all right Bad-dog, wow, 'men without hats' ... been a long time since I ever thought about them lol!

I think you're right.

you're a prince among menu certainly do drive through your point. we are fine, we'll just say you're the salt of the earth though you've probably got salt and pepper hair?

James Minor 5 years ago

After the cost of diversion, cheap burritos filled with roach legs, diarreha, pepto bismol, and jail time. She will wonder if it was worth it.

beatrice 5 years ago

A King really isn't somebody until he has his Queen.

bad_dog 5 years ago

Once a King, always a King, but once a (K)night's enough...

labmonkey 5 years ago

Just not classy enough for Chipolte. Burrito King kind of reminds me of that 100 tacos for $100 place in The Simpsons... the one that used to be a photo developing booth.

frankfussman 5 years ago

I eat at the Burrito King often. I even use my elementary Spanish when ordering. The food is good and cheap.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

*we may wish to remember this one for my 'best threads of 2012!' pretty funny so far.


Mistakes happen and people feel regret.

January 13, 2012 at 12:14 a.m.

---uh, you speaking for yourself Kristen?

and, btw, I'm married, have several quite dear female friends.
I simply tend to avoid skanky drunk wenches who have anger problems and get drunk and drive at 2a.m.

there are better women to associate with around here.

littlexav 5 years ago

Like the ones in the Taco Bell drive-through instead?


MarcoPogo 5 years ago

If this is going to be one of the "Best Threads of 2012", it might be time to put this website down.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

MP "might" meaning it might get there if things continue.
this help you?

MarcoPogo 5 years ago

No help at all since the end result could mean that this was one of the year's highlights around here. We can do better than this. (But congratulations on your string of puns. I have no BEEF with you.)

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

thanks MP, just the flour of my 'fertile' mind, or just a corney sense of humor.
but then you have to experience that at tortilla flats.

beatrice 5 years ago

I just thought you took issue with women who smell of refried beans.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

I just thought you took issue with women who smell of refried beans.

smell of refried beans=a drug or other agent that excites sexual desire.

Grant_Runyun 5 years ago

This comment was removed by the site staff for violation of the usage agreement.

bad_dog 5 years ago

Make it "queue" and it's still usable for waiting in line purposes.

"Her burrito she threw when bumped in the queue"

bad_dog 5 years ago

Make mine a double goodarse whoopin...

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

Con1! ROTFL!!!!

your poem is hilarious!

we must raise money starting immediately to erect a monument stone next to the King with that poem inscribed in it in huge lettering!

so funny!

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

so, 9;55 post was removed eh. just wondering if that was miss kristeniswright87 back again?

bad_dog 5 years ago

Doesn't appear so from her posting history.. Perhaps a cuzin?

Better ask autie.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

wow! Bad-dog, you've really hit on something:
April flipped out because she had an old couch fastened to the top of her car and it held loose change between the cushions!

okay then.

bearded_gnome 5 years ago

the burrito king just goes blithely on promoting burrito rage.

if burritos are outlawed, then only outlaws will have burritos.

mandate a 24-hour waiting period and a mental health check before burrito store operators can sell their evil weapons of destruction. they should also have to check CCW licenses.

[btw, I ate burritos tonight lol]

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