To the editor:

So this gay man, a lesbian woman and a conservative lawmaker walk into a Lawrence bar. “What’ll you have?” asks the barkeep. The gay man says, “I’ll have liberty, freedom and a side of non-discrimination.” The lesbian woman says, “I’ll have what he’s having, but with a side of compassion.” The lawmaker says, “I’ll have a shot of homophobia mixed with a squeeze of hate and a bale of biblical cherry-picking on the side, just in case I need to explain myself.”

The bartender says, “Hey, I thought this was supposed to be a joke.” “Not if you have any self-respect,” says the lesbian woman. “Not if you understand what ‘Free State’ means,” says the gay man. The bartender looks at the lawmaker and says, “We don’t serve your kind here.”