Heather Locklear returns to prime time in the diverting made-for-cable head-scratcher “He Loves Me” (8 p.m., Lifetime). The star of “Dynasty,” “Melrose Place” and “Flirting with Forty” (6 p.m., Lifetime) has never been what you’d call a great actress. Rather, she’s blazed a career out of over-the-top guilty-pleasure roles that have kept her on camera for more than three decades. She’s also traversed the perilous voyage from sexy young thing to “she still looks good for her age” — a rare feat for any female performer.
It’s difficult to describe “He Loves Me” in too much detail without giving away key plot points. Suffice it to say that when it begins, Laura (Locklear) is seen having rather risky “relations” with Sam (Max Martini) aboard a commuter ferry. We soon learn that Sam, a razor-phobic, rough-talking, tattooed sax player, is not her husband. Cut to a loving and doting dad, Nick (Dylan Neal). But then, just to show us that Laura is not just any bad girl, she’s seen giving money to a homeless woman and then engaging in a heart-to-heart with a fellow realtor in her high-end office who appears to know Laura’s secret and warns her that she risks losing “everything.”
At this moment, a run-of-the-mill Lifetime movie could go on auto-pilot and navigate the “Smart Woman, Foolish Choices,” genre or settle down to an cautionary tale of sex addiction or other such therapeutic folderol.
Then — and again, I risk saying too much — about halfway through, the movie takes an implausible turn and never looks back. And, I’m happy to say, it becomes less believable with every passing scene. Like the most memorable TV movies, “He Loves Me” follows a perverse and enjoyable trajectory. It just gets better and better as it grows worse and worse.
• Virginia Madsen guest stars as a newly appointed senator on the two-hour helping of “The Event” (7 p.m., NBC), now returning to the schedule.
• As “The Event” returns for the second half of its truncated season, “Greek” (8 p.m., ABC Family) graduates from the airwaves. The gang rally to stop the destruction of their fraternity house in this finale.
• The micro-fracturing of the pop music business has created an environment where a performer can be on the top of the charts in one particular genre and remain a complete stranger to everybody else. In many ways, it’s not unlike cable television. With that in mind, “All About Aubrey” (9 p.m., Oxygen) follows the comeback trail of Aubrey O’Day, a former member of the manufactured girl group Danity Kane.
Tonight’s other highlights
• Cuddy receives sobering news on “House” (7 p.m., Fox,).
• An evangelizing teen knocks on the wrong door on “The Chicago Code” (8 p.m., Fox).
• Danny’s ex comes in handy on “Hawaii Five-O” (9 p.m., CBS).
• A teen doctor administers to victims of gang violence on “Harry’s Law” (9 p.m., NBC).
• A new novel gains Hollywood’s attention on “Castle” (9 p.m., ABC,).
• A well-connected nanny vanishes on “The Closer” (9 p.m., TNT).
• “Behind the Music” (9 p.m., VH1) profiles Nelly.