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Archive for Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Mothers-to-be on Bravo’s new show anything but mellow

April 5, 2011

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Bravo continues its successful tradition of making new shows that have that patented “hate on sight” quality that turns them into instant water-cooler conversation. If you think “Pregnant in Heels” (9 p.m., Bravo) sounds as if it’s about a mother-to-be with a shoe obsession, you would only be half wrong. It’s about a fabulously successful woman who caters to mothers-to-be with shoe obsessions — among other personal afflictions.

“Heels” stars Rosie Pope, a self-styled “maternity concierge,” a phrase as pretentious as it is ridiculous. Like many of the breathless experts on Bravo, she’s from London by way of Mars. It’s her job to come up with new interior designs so that self-absorbed and at times overtly hostile women with too much time and money can fit their new infant accessory into their wretchedly spoiled existences. This is basically “Real Pregnant Housewives of New York,” where a “price is no object” attitude meets raging hormones.

Rosie’s first clients are two super-busy parents who design websites. She confesses that she has always seen her baby-to-be as a “parasitic life-sucking force.” He boldly announces that they live in “a neighborhood called Tribeca,” as if this were his own personal discovery that he’s deigning to share with us. Like I said, it’s “hate on sight.” If I’m not careful, Bravo might trademark that phrase for their marketing department.

• If watching rich people acting like monsters is not your cup of tea, you can enjoy watching poor people being exploited. “Auction Hunters” (9 p.m., Spike) enters its second season following Allen Haff and Clinton “Ton” Jones as they scour the country looking for buried treasures by blind bidding on the contents of “abandoned” storage lockers.

While “Auction” celebrates this peculiar form of bottom feeding, real people know that these storage units have been “abandoned” by recently unemployed people who can no long afford to pay the rent on the places where they have stored their possessions. The notion of turning this form of opportunism and parasitism into “entertainment” is not unique to Spike.

Tonight’s other highlights

• The 1990 Ken Burns documentary “The Civil War” (7 p.m., PBS) continues.

• Finn has a religious experience over lunch on “Glee” (7 p.m., Fox).

• J.J. must be rescued on the season finale of “No Ordinary Family” (7 p.m., ABC).

• Murder in posh precincts on “NCIS: Los Angeles” (8 p.m., CBS).

• Love comes in many disguises on “Raising Hope” (8 p.m., Fox).

• Brent finds a winning recipe for goat’s milk on “Fabulous Beekman Boys” (8 p.m., Planet Green).

• A tiff over money on “Traffic Light” (8:30 p.m., Fox).

• Michael J. Fox returns as Louis Canning on “The Good Wife” (9 p.m., CBS).

• Adam frets on “Parenthood” (9 p.m., NBC).

• A victim seems too close for comfort on “Body of Proof” (9 p.m., ABC).

• Lights takes on Reynolds for the title on “Lights Out” (9 p.m., FX).

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