“You need an attitude adjustment!” We are sure you have heard that one before. We are also fairly certain you find that adjusting one’s attitude is much easier said than done.

In psychology, attitude can be defined similar to this: a preference or tendency to respond negatively, positively or ambivalently toward a person, place, object, idea or situation. Our attitudes develop over time and may shift as we gain new experiences. Experience is the predominant force behind the shaping of our attitudes. However, awaiting a new experience in hopes of an attitude adjustment can result in a long wait and/or no change. This can be a big problem if our attitude is draining our energy, causing depression or affecting those around us.

Our attitude instructs how we perceive ourselves, our environment and those in our environment. It guides our interactions with our environment. It therefore has a tremendous impact on how others shape their attitudes, particularly our children. And we all know how difficult it is to be around someone who has a negative attitude all the time. Therefore your negative attitude may cause others to develop a negative attitude toward you. Remember our attitudes are mostly shaped by experience.

So why is it so hard to change your attitude? If you think changing your attitude is as simple as changing your thinking … you are wrong? Our minds certainly have a role in it all; however, our attitude is shaped by physically felt perceptions as much, or more than, by our thinking. In fact, our thinking is more a result of our felt perception. So simply instructing yourself to change your attitude by thinking a positive thought may have a brief immediate impact; however, it will probably not lead to a long-term benefit. Instead, you need to find a way to change your felt experience without waiting for new experiences to happen.

We have found a simple process that can be very effective when practiced regularly. It was developed by Doc Childre at the Institute of HeartMath (www.heartmath.org) and used in their educational programs. It is called Attitude Breathing. It involves the use of both your felt sense and your thinking process. Here are the simple steps:

• Shift your attention to your heart and solar plexus/stomach area.

• Ask yourself, “What would be a better attitude for me to maintain in this situation?” Then set up an inner attitude, like “be calm,” “don’t judge,” “make peace and let this go” or other attitude that you deem appropriate.

• Now gently and sincerely imagine breathing the new attitude in through your heart. Now breathe the attitude out through the solar plexus and stomach to anchor it. Do this until you feel that the new attitude has set in.

You can use attitude breathing whenever you are experiencing negative thoughts or a difficult mood. We recommend checking in first thing in the morning and doing attitude breathing to start your day on a positive note. Choose specific attitudes that will benefit you throughout the day and practice the exercise often to avoid the momentum of negative attitudes taking over.