Archive for Thursday, February 4, 2010

Lawrence man arrested after assault with meat thermometer

February 4, 2010


A 58-year-old Lawrence resident was arrested Wednesday afternoon on charges of aggravated assault. According to Lawrence Police Sgt. Mark Warren, the incident began as a neighborhood dispute in the 2500 block of Crestline Drive. Warren said the incident, which involved a dispute over a dog, occurred about 12:05 p.m.

The Lawrence man was arrested after reportedly poking an animal control officer with a meat thermometer. The man was booked at the Douglas County Jail at 12:40 p.m.


Maddy Griffin 8 years, 4 months ago

I guess that particular Animal Control Officer wasn't packing heat.

been_there 8 years, 4 months ago

City Animal Control officers do not carry guns, Lawrence Humane Society employees are the ones with the guns. Just to clarify things a little. Hmm, man with a dog and a meat thermometer, don't want to think about that.

budwhysir 8 years, 4 months ago

talk about loosing your cool. I suppose it is a good thing he had a way of measuring the dog catchers temperature. Wouldnt want things to get heated over a dispute over the dog days of winter

acg 8 years, 4 months ago

I don't know which part of this was funnier, the headline, the actual story or you guys' comments. Autie, u nearly made me choke on my coffee.

Maddy Griffin 8 years, 4 months ago

For real ..."Congealed weapon"... hot coffee through the nose is NO fun!!

a_flock_of_jayhawks 8 years, 4 months ago

You guys are three funny!

Somehow, I don't think occasional probes from a meat thermometer are in the animal control personnel's job description.

BorderRuffian 8 years, 4 months ago

Pywacket - I about bust a gut laughing. Congealed weapon, indeed.

But, and especially in response to Roe's blog on Concealed Carry, I must firmly take a stand here and state most adamantly that from now on, Animal Control officers not only should, but MUST be required to arm themselves similarly and each should be trained in and carry meat thermometers. That way, they can not only match their opponents in the same degree, but beyond that they can better ask probing questions, meat their adversaries head on, and when required, stick it to animal abusers.

Now the only question remains - should they have the right to use basters?

Kip Patzel 8 years, 4 months ago

Pywacket WTG that would make a great T shirt are you selling them soon?

"Don't Probe me Bro"


lindseydoyle 8 years, 4 months ago

Meat thermometers don't kill people, people kill people. People and their effing dogs! We should extinct the whole species (dogs that is.)

thebigspoon 8 years, 4 months ago

This was definitely assault in the 2nd degree. Wait, 3rd, no 4th wait, 6th.....................

BigPrune 8 years, 4 months ago

Getting poked with a meat thermometer would be like having someone jab you with a fat pliable nail. I'd think both could hurt bad.

jehovah_bob 8 years, 4 months ago

Guy should consider himself lucky it wasn't a rectal thermometer.

puddleglum 8 years, 4 months ago

good one bea.

I was wondering how long this guy will thaw out for?

bearded_gnome 8 years, 4 months ago

OMG, very funny! "congealed weapon" FTW.

somebody has to say it: if meat thermometers are outlawed, then only outlaws will have meat thermometers!

I just hope that after they arested the guy, they really gave him the "first degree!" you know, this guy could be a part of a sleeper cell, and we are lulled into a sense of security now that he's securely stowed in the bighouse playing poker with the other crooks. I say: treat him like a terrorist, and marinate[waterboard] him until he gives up some information. being slack on this will just breed more like Mr. Meatthermometercrook. we have to make sure he and his ilk are all washed up!

Oh, the article doesn't tell us anything about the dog in the quarrel!. we want to know, did the dog try to go his bail? or, did the dog raise one paw and say "bye-bye sucker" as Thermometerman was hauled off?

beatrice 8 years, 4 months ago

If the oven mitt don't fit, you have to acquit!

beatrice 8 years, 4 months ago

The parametics knew the victim was a goner when they arrived. The needle was already well below 98.6, and falling fast.

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