Archive for Friday, September 25, 2009
Environmentalists seek to wipe out plush toilet paper
September 25, 2009
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Elmwood Park, N.J. — There is a battle for America’s behinds.
It is a fight over toilet paper: the kind that is blanket-fluffy and getting fluffier so fast that manufacturers are running out of synonyms for “soft” (Quilted Northern Ultra Plush is the first big brand to go three-ply and three-adjective).
It’s a menace, environmental groups say — and a dark-comedy example of American excess.
The reason, they say, is that plush U.S. toilet paper is usually made by chopping down and grinding up trees that were decades or even a century old. They want Americans, like Europeans, to wipe with tissue made from recycled paper goods.
It has been slow going. Big toilet-paper makers say that they’ve taken steps to become more Earth-friendly but that their customers still want the soft stuff, so they’re still selling it.
‘At what price is softness?’
This summer, two of the best-known combatants in this fight signed a surprising truce, with a big tissue maker promising to do better. But the larger battle goes on — the ultimate test of how green Americans will be when nobody’s watching.
“At what price softness?” said Tim Spring, chief executive of Marcal Manufacturing, a New Jersey paper maker that is trying to persuade customers to try 100 percent recycled paper. “Should I contribute to clear-cutting and deforestation because the big (marketing) machine has told me that softness is important?”
He added: “You’re not giving up the world here.”
Toilet paper is far from being the biggest threat to the world’s forests: together with facial tissue, it accounts for 5 percent of the U.S. forest-products industry, according to industry figures. Paper and cardboard packaging makes up 26 percent of the industry, although more than half is made from recycled products. Newspapers account for 3 percent.
But environmentalists say 5 percent is still too much.
Felling these trees removes a valuable scrubber of carbon dioxide, they say. If the trees come from “farms” in places such as Brazil, Indonesia or the southeastern United States, natural forests are being displaced. If they come from Canada’s forested north — a major source of imported wood pulp — ecosystems valuable to bears, caribou and migratory birds are being damaged.
And, activists say, there’s just the foolish idea of the thing: old trees cut down for the briefest and most undignified of ends.
“It’s like the Hummer product for the paper industry,” said Allen Hershkowitz, senior scientist with the Natural Resources Defense Council. “We don’t need old-growth forests ... to wipe our behinds.”
Still large demand
The reason for this fight lies in toilet-paper engineering. Each sheet is a web of wood fibers, and fibers from old trees are longer, which produces a smoother and more supple web. Fibers made from recycled paper — in this case magazines, newspapers or computer printouts — are shorter. The web often is rougher.
So, when toilet paper is made for the “away from home” market, the no-choice bathrooms in restaurants, offices and schools, manufacturers use recycled fiber about 75 percent of the time.
But for the “at home” market, the paper customers buy for themselves, 5 percent at most is fully recycled. The rest is mostly or totally “virgin” fiber, taken from newly cut trees, according to the market analysis firm RISI Inc.
Big tissue makers say they’ve tried to make their products as green as possible, including by buying more wood pulp from forest operations certified as sustainable.
But despite environmentalists’ concerns, they say customers are unwavering in their desire for the softest paper possible.
“That’s a segment (of consumers) that is quite demanding of products that are soft,” said James Malone, a spokesman for Georgia-Pacific. Sales figures seem to make that clear: Quilted Northern Ultra Plush, the three-ply stuff, sold 24 million packages in the past year, bringing in more than $144 million, according to the market research firm Information Resources Inc.
Making changes
Last month, Greenpeace announced an agreement that it said would change this industry from the inside.
The environmental group had spent 4 1/2 years attacking Kimberly-Clark, the makers of Kleenex and Cottonelle toilet paper, for getting wood from old-growth forests in Canada.
But the group said it is calling off the “Kleercut” campaign: Kimberly-Clark had agreed to make its practices greener.
By 2011, the company said, 40 percent of the fiber in all its tissue products will come from recycled paper or sustainable forests.
“We could have campaigned forever,” said Lindsey Allen, a senior forest campaigner with Greenpeace. But this was enough, she said, because Kimberly-Clark’s changes could alter the entire wood-pulp supply chain: “They have a policy that ... will shift the entire way that tissue companies work.”
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25 September 2009
at 8:34 a.m.
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RETICENT_IRREVERENT (Anonymous) says…
The choice of over, rather than under, will achieve a 20% cut in use, thereby be, ipso facto, by defacto a 20% cut your personal share of deforestration.
Here is a handy-dandy brochure you can print out and place in the appropriate areas.
http://currentconfig.com/images/overi…
Over=Good, Under=Bad
Or, there is always your left hand, a waterbowl, soap, and a handtowel.
25 September 2009
at 10:30 a.m.
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jonas_opines (Anonymous) says…
Saving the world, one wipe at a time.
25 September 2009
at 10:41 a.m.
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feeble (Anonymous) says…
This really chafes my derriere !
25 September 2009
at 10:50 a.m.
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infidel (Anonymous) says…
corn cobs for everyone
25 September 2009
at 11:04 a.m.
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Liberty_One (Anonymous) says…
American bottoms: the biggest threat to the environment!
25 September 2009
at 11:10 a.m.
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unsavoryagent (Anonymous) says…
How did I end up at the Onion?
25 September 2009
at 11:16 a.m.
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jonas_opines (Anonymous) says…
This comment was removed by the site staff for violation of the usage agreement.
25 September 2009
at 11:28 a.m.
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tomatogrower (Anonymous) says…
This 3 ply toilet paper is a scam. They charge more, because they tell you can use less, so you are really saving money, but in reality, people still use the same amount of paper, fluffy or not, so it's costing you more. It's like not lowering the price of a candy bar, just make it smaller with fewer nuts.
25 September 2009
at 11:30 a.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
R_I is right, it also keeps people from touching the wall with contaminated hands! Your walls stay cleaner and so do you.
(You peeps know to wash the walls around the dispenser and light switches, right? I've found some didn't know walls can/should be washed ) ;)
Not to mention, if your paper is design printed, this way the design faces out all the time.
If people would teach their kids to take time to count their square while they are going…they're in there anyway.
Random numbers for example:
Needed: 4 squares per wipe.
But sometimes they hurriedly yank off 6, maybe 8.
You do the math. Counting can reduce usage by 50 to 75%.
How many bulky packages of that do you want to buy and carry home, taking up room in the cart?
Saves more trees than going to cheap paper, because everyone is going to use yards of that, just trying to keep it from breaking open in the middle, disintegrating as they wipe.
25 September 2009
at 11:37 a.m.
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ranger73 (Anonymous) says…
do it like my dog does and run around the yard in circles dragging it's bottom on the grass…
25 September 2009
at 11:45 a.m.
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BigPrune (Anonymous) says…
Sheryl Crow a/k/a Stinky, recommends one or two squares when wiping.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/arti…
25 September 2009
at 11:46 a.m.
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gccs14r (Anonymous) says…
Feed your dog better food and he won't need to do that.
25 September 2009
at 11:50 a.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
Looks like it's time to invest in witch hazel futures.
25 September 2009
at 11:59 a.m.
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snap_pop_no_crackle (Anonymous) says…
At last! A use for carbon credits!
25 September 2009
at 12:07 p.m.
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jonas_opines (Anonymous) says…
This comment was removed by the site staff for violation of the usage agreement.
25 September 2009
at 12:08 p.m.
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gogoplata (Anonymous) says…
Their mommas must be so proud.
25 September 2009
at 12:10 p.m.
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blue73harley (Anonymous) says…
I miss getting HUGE catalogs in the mail.
Thank god they still send phone books. And the pages aren't as slick.
25 September 2009
at 12:12 p.m.
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Liberty_One (Anonymous) says…
jonas, that was quite a funny pun I was making though, wasn't it?
25 September 2009
at 12:18 p.m.
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Clickker (Anonymous) says…
The one thing I hate is the crowd that is pushing the washable ( reusable) wipes for the bathroom.
My neighbor does that and I refuse to go there. She uses a diaper bin, but it eventually starts to fester.
And I'm not sure the washing of the cloths saves that much energy.
25 September 2009
at 12:24 p.m.
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unsavoryagent (Anonymous) says…
“This 3 ply toilet paper is a scam. ”
We need a federal agency to supervise this, tomatogrower. You know, like your “real capitalism” would have.
25 September 2009
at 12:49 p.m.
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barrypenders (Anonymous) says…
Once dry, used tea bags work.
Darwin bless you all
25 September 2009
at 1:02 p.m.
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puddleglum (Anonymous) says…
berryboy sez: “Once dry, used tea bags work.”
yeah, worked great for all the teabaggers from the gop last summer!
ha!
if you really want to save the environment, conserve toilet paper-use both sides.
25 September 2009
at 1:21 p.m.
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bad_dog (Anonymous) says…
“if you really want to save the environment, conserve toilet paper-use both sides.”
That reminds me of a poster from back in the day that featured a toilet with paper dispenser mounted above the tank. The paper was routed through rollers, under the seat and down the front of the bowl to another roll with bicycle pedals mounted upon either side. The sign above the stool read: “Reverse Roll When Empty”.
25 September 2009
at 2:09 p.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
Just when you think it can't get any loonier……..when will Obama appoint a Hygeine Products Czar? This is mission critical!
25 September 2009
at 2:24 p.m.
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JayCat_67 (Anonymous) says…
There is, of course, the “one sheet method” of wiping, but describing it just doesn't do it justice. You have to see the demonstration.
and, Tom, buddy, you really need to get a life, dude.
25 September 2009
at 2:25 p.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
Mexicans and many other under-developed nations don't flush toilet paper (if they even use a toilet). What have I been telling you about drifting toward third-worldness?
Will I have to learn how to carry two 5-gallon buckets of water on a yoke too? Wash my clothes down in the creek on some rocks?
WOW!!~~~~~~~
25 September 2009
at 2:43 p.m.
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headdoctor (Anonymous) says…
TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
Mexicans and many other under-developed nations don't flush toilet paper (if they even use a toilet). What have I been telling you about drifting toward third-worldness?
Will I have to learn how to carry two 5-gallon buckets of water on a yoke too? Wash my clothes down in the creek on some rocks?
___________________________________________________
WHAT? You do not already do this. Now what kind of conservative are you?
25 September 2009
at 3 p.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
clickker,
I hear ya!
What many people don't realize, is that washing machines don't completely empty of water. Some water from each load remains in the workings. Thus, some bacteria, food particles, combine with the water that comes in for the next load…and the next..and the next.
So that people who wash diapers..and those cloths are redistributing particles of feces throughout everyone's clothing, face cloths, bras, pillowcases, bath towels. And you know how those suck in particles and hang onto to them!
A person would need to wash the diapers and cloths, then run an extra empty run of nothing, with hot water, and bleach and detergent and all..through all cycles, maybe more, to get most of it out of the machine if they wanted to reduce that.
The energy wasted right there to heat the water, soap,etc…not to mention the bleach that would be needed to clean those cloths well.
We really need two extra loads of bleach washings each week per household so that we can use those.
We could use plastic scoops, run them from back to front and wash them in the dishwasher, they would clean up better.
A four section dishwasher basket:
Knifes, forks, spoons and pscoops. (Say it like Jim Carrey and Morgan Freeman in Bruce Almighty, you know the scene)
Little kid version with Willy Wonka and Dora the Explorer.
Too kinky?
I can just see the Tupperware Party demonstration on that one.
Maybe that would be in the pass around box of free give-aways, along with the orange peelers and the pickle forks.
Free with your purchase of Febreeze.
(So you can relax)
25 September 2009
at 3:38 p.m.
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Boosh (Anonymous) says…
eeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeee
25 September 2009
at 3:46 p.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
I recommend everyone start learning the “two square” method. And buy some Prep H sanitary wipes. Things could get, how shall I say, a bit irritating with new enviro-wacko sanctions that Obama will surely embrace.
25 September 2009
at 3:54 p.m.
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ralphralph (Anonymous) says…
I have long predicted that the day would come when we would need to have The Government wipe our backsides, but I thought it would be because we were too dependent and lazy.
25 September 2009
at 4:14 p.m.
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jonas_opines (Anonymous) says…
Good lord, nevermind!! I just can't win on this one.
L!1: Notsa bad.
25 September 2009
at 4:26 p.m.
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TopJayhawk (Anonymous) says…
Aw Tom, you beat me to it.
We need a toilet paper czar now!!
When I was single, I used napkins from McDonalds and other fast-food places, worked just fine. The Golden Arches make for a clean sweep.
25 September 2009
at 4:29 p.m.
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keebler1rk (Anonymous) says…
really having a hard time taking these people seriously anaymore. I'm not unsympotheic to environmental issues, but this is really getting out of hand. makes me want to go buy the plushest a$$wipe I can find!
25 September 2009
at 6:11 p.m.
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gccs14r (Anonymous) says…
There's always the option of a washlet or bidet. Paper isn't required, it's merely customary here.
25 September 2009
at 6:24 p.m.
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OldEnuf2BYurDad (Anonymous) says…
They can pry [a huge wad of ] my Charmin Super-Strong from my cold, dead, not-yet-washed right hand!
As long as we have legal abortions, we should have legally plush toilet paper. I think the phrase is “what I do with my body is my business”… with emphasis on “business”. Finally, I can get “behind” Roe v. Wade.
25 September 2009
at 6:48 p.m.
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beatrice (Anonymous) says…
“As long as they have legal abortions …”
So what is the Godwin equivalent for bringing abortion into a non-abortion issue?
Recycled paper or not as long as they just take those dingle-berry bears off tv, I'll be satisfied.
25 September 2009
at 6:58 p.m.
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jonas_opines (Anonymous) says…
“So what is the Godwin equivalent for bringing abortion into a non-abortion issue?”
Bod-whine?
25 September 2009
at 7:06 p.m.
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beerguy (Anonymous) says…
I remember seeing an episode of Modern Marvels that said when toilet paper first came out people would use it to write on because it was too nice to use to wipe. That's what the Sears catalog was for until they started printing it with glossy pages.
25 September 2009
at 7:17 p.m.
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beobachter (Anonymous) says…
just think of how much could be saved if right wingers, such as Rush, Beck, Tom etc, didn't have to use so much wiping the BS off their lips.
25 September 2009
at 7:22 p.m.
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toe (Anonymous) says…
I read this listening to Wipe Out by The Surfaris. Seriously, I know who supports this new cause by their smell.
25 September 2009
at 7:25 p.m.
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beerguy (Anonymous) says…
beobachter, are you telling me left wing sh*t don't smell? George Washington said a country dominated by only two political parties is doomed to fail.
25 September 2009
at 8:17 p.m.
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Guardian (Anonymous) says…
Stories like this just warm the cockles of my heart. Next will be the Toilet Police who will also be responsible for checking your carbon rations card.
25 September 2009
at 8:40 p.m.
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beobachter (Anonymous) says…
beerguy read what I posted. Did I mention smell?
25 September 2009
at 9:19 p.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
I see Obama appointing a Potty Re-Training Czar here in the near future.
25 September 2009
at 9:27 p.m.
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RETICENT_IRREVERENT (Anonymous) says…
Squat toilets for everyone!
25 September 2009
at 9:27 p.m.
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Marion (Marion Lynn) says…
This comment was removed by the site staff for violation of the usage agreement.
25 September 2009
at 10:32 p.m.
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ivalueamerica (Anonymous) says…
Bidet
25 September 2009
at 10:56 p.m.
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Marion (Marion Lynn) says…
Eat only with your right hand; that is the Muslim way.
25 September 2009
at 11:15 p.m.
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Satirical (Anonymous) says…
These environmentalists can recycle and use all of my previously used toilet paper they want. After-all, I only used one side. They can use the other side of my used toilet paper when nature calls : )
If they refuse, then clearly they don't genuinely care about the caribou or the environment. It's a win-win; I get to keep my soft toilet paper, and they get to feel good about helping the environment.
25 September 2009
at 11:19 p.m.
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Satirical (Anonymous) says…
We should all become environmentalists and ship our used toilet paper to these people, so it gets maximum use. Anyone know their address?
25 September 2009
at 11:44 p.m.
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beerguy (Anonymous) says…
“Eat only with your right hand; that is Muslim way.”
—Marion
I'm starting to see why some people don't like Marion, but in this case he is telling the truth. There is a reason why the left hand is seen as unclean.
26 September 2009
at 12:13 a.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
Oh now there's a blog, left or right handed..lol.
Everyone would look at each other very skewed from now on.
ewww. how does he DO that? He's right handed but he wipes with his left? How good a job can THAT DO?!?!?!?
OR image the wife, having done his somewhat not so wonderful laundry after 20 years, learning he's been wiping with his left not his much more dexterous right…and wanting to beat him over the head!
It could be the final straw.
“Your honor, I put up with the man for years.I put up with his drinking, his throwing clothes on the floor, his cussing at every task he attempts, but this…”
26 September 2009
at 12:33 a.m.
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Marion (Marion Lynn) says…
beerguy (Anonymous) says…
“Eat only with your right hand; that is Muslim way.”
—Marion
I'm starting to see why some people don't like Marion, but in this case he is telling the truth. There is a reason why the left hand is seen as unclean.”
Marion writes:
You don't like me because I tell the truth?
Can you handle the truth?
26 September 2009
at 3:03 a.m.
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beerguy (Anonymous) says…
Oh I know the truth, but many people don't wish to hear it, or at least prefer it sugared down with some sprinkles on top.
26 September 2009
at 3:26 a.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
I just recently had two new REALLY nice toilets installed in two of our bathrooms. They're more ergonomically designed and for some reason I think my TP usage is considerably less. And the thing I like the most is, unlike the old ones, no matter how challenged, they never, ever require a second flush. And that is saving water too!
26 September 2009
at 4:26 a.m.
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merrill (Anonymous) says…
Nice toilets Tom.
Hey instead of toilet paper why not encourage residential toilets with a douche. Then dry the butt with a towel. This would also prevent or reduce irritation.
A douche is a device used to introduce a stream of water into the body for medical or hygienic reasons.
This would reduce the need for toilet paper quite substantially.
26 September 2009
at 5:31 a.m.
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BigPrune (Anonymous) says…
merrill, I've never heard of a man douching. Does everyone share a towel in your household? What does the wife think about you douching? It sounds quite sick, really.
26 September 2009
at 8:08 a.m.
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merrill (Anonymous) says…
Why couldn't men douche?
26 September 2009
at 8:43 a.m.
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Pilgrim2 (Anonymous) says…
merrill (Anonymous) says…
Hey instead of toilet paper why not encourage residential toilets with a douche. Then dry the butt with a towel. This would also prevent or reduce irritation.
A douche is a device used to introduce a stream of water into the body for medical or hygienic reasons.
This would reduce the need for toilet paper quite substantially.
*******************************************
Is that how you do it, Richard? Your response will be very instructive.
26 September 2009
at 8:53 a.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
A good idea is to keep a box of Prep H wipes by every toilet. There is nothing more bothersome than that 'not-so-fresh' feeling on your bum. All it is, is a witch hazel soaked towelette. Did any of you see the episode on that show about OCD disorders about the women who scrubbed her bum with toothbrushes and stuff? Now that's a little over the top! How'd you like to accidentally grab the wrong toothbrush one day? Yuk!
My two teenage boys? HA! They go through at least a double roll a day. WOW! When I was a bachelor, a roll would last me at least all week. I used the same towel for days, and could eat on $40 a week max! Well, beer and liquor? That was a whole different story, it took the rest of my disposable income (and then some).
26 September 2009
at 8:55 a.m.
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classclown (Anonymous) says…
Merril are you sure you don't mean enema?
26 September 2009
at 9:03 a.m.
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classclown (Anonymous) says…
As Marion would say… It will be recalled that I broke this story way back when…
nah… I'm not trying to be like Marion. But I did make mention of this a few months ago with this post.
http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2009/may…
I read about this back then. I think I noticed it while reading News Of The Weird and then looked it up. I'm surprised it took this long for our media to make mention of it though. As if this is something new.
Maybe now that they're not spending as much time singing a certain someone's praises they're trying to catch up on what they should have been reporting on all along.
26 September 2009
at 9:50 a.m.
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rubberband (Anonymous) says…
My teen daughter's take on this: “That's just crap.”
26 September 2009
at 10:35 a.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
Now this is getting hilarious.
You guys need to rent Ron White's latest,
here is a clip, the toilets in his hotel room. Perhaps this will help.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCao3h…
26 September 2009
at 10:35 a.m.
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BigPrune (Anonymous) says…
Merrill, I still don't know how a man could douche. I will cut and paste and save your post so I can repost it when you are giving your expert advice on other important matters.
How about one square of toilet paper and a government regulation on undergarments requiring a ScotchGard stripe for fabric protection if you're okay with the government in our bathrooms? They could leave it up to the “Do Not Remove Tag From Mattress” czar to regulate it.
26 September 2009
at 10:47 a.m.
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BigPrune (Anonymous) says…
Nice one Multi!
Here's one for Merrill
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_b3oP…
26 September 2009
at 2:18 p.m.
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RoeDapple (Anonymous) says…
Soon your Dillons Card (or Hyvee, Walmart, Costco) will be mandatory for checking out at the register. If your purchases of toilet paper or any other rationed product are beyond limits set by your government you will get “Purchase Denied”. GM will become profitable again through sales of black Suburbans to the government. Stock prices for Bell Helicopter will skyrocket as production of black stealth helicopters triples. Reynolds Aluminum has already increased production in anticipation of foil hats needed. Ammunition manufacturers are already working three shifts to feed the black hole that is swallowing miilions of rounds of 9MM ammo per day….
Didn't Johnny Carson start all this in '73?
26 September 2009
at 7:05 p.m.
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Marion (Marion Lynn) says…
Bidet sales should pick up though.
26 September 2009
at 7:57 p.m.
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beatrice (Anonymous) says…
Merrill just gave a whole new meaning to the phrase, “Don't touch the guest towels!”
26 September 2009
at 8:35 p.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
Why not just buy that convenient three pack of Clorox wipes at Walmart?
Think of the bathing time you can save!
Skip the morning shower..wipe down head to toe right there while you go, finish with the tail end.
When you get done, you can use the other side to wipe down the sink, lid, seat, base, then the rim.
(too bad they don't do mirrors)
After all, doing the cleaning in little bits, makes it seem like
much less of a chore doesn't it?
By the time you're ready for work, you have made it so you can sleep in on Saturday.
All from the comfort of le'crapper.
26 September 2009
at 9:13 p.m.
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RKLOG (Mark Andrew) says…
OK, everyone likes to hide behind their funny, clever little anonymous posts but saving our environmental resources is actually a serious issue. We need to start working on this now so that our kids and future generations can enjoy the luxuries that we do. It's the citizens like us that can make a difference, and for such little effort. Are your butts that important that you can't at least heed some of the free advice you getting about improving the environment? Or will waiting for the state to force you to stop wasting resources make you feel more like Americans? If you are too lazy to do this for the rest of us that are trying to make a difference, then at least do it for your grandchildren.
26 September 2009
at 10:21 p.m.
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Godot (Anonymous) says…
I support research into the efficacy of using moistened tobacco leaves as the primary aide in personal toileting hygiene. The tobacco leaf is large enough for the job, is biodegradable, and represents a plant that no one in the greenie world wants to preserve. Transforming tobacco from hated inhalation addiction to a**wipe addiciton, in less than a generation, would manifest a truly green accomplishment of world-wide impaction.
27 September 2009
at 7:55 a.m.
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sunny (Anonymous) says…
RKLOG….'our grandchildren'?
Nobody cares about our grandchildren! They won't be able to afford any type of TP, they will be busy paying for the car manufacturer bail-outs and the billions of trillions of dept that your Hussein has gotten us into.
27 September 2009
at 8:04 a.m.
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tumbilweed (Anonymous) says…
Thank you Mark Andrew!
This thread is lame.
I think the reason why the above don't care is they all already have grandchildren.
27 September 2009
at 8:16 a.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
Godot, then we'd see a dramatic increase in rectal cancer.
27 September 2009
at 9:23 a.m.
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classclown (Anonymous) says…
Just get a small dog and use it. It can always go out in the yard and roll around and clean itself off.
27 September 2009
at 10:15 a.m.
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Marion (Marion Lynn) says…
A Google search using this search term:
“history of wiping bottoms”
yields hilarious and interesting results but I don't think that I can get away with reprinting any of them here!
27 September 2009
at 10:52 a.m.
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phenommenom (Anonymous) says…
Geez toliet paper is toliet paper one ply should be good enough! It would be nice if we all did something to ensure that Earth will be here and healthy for the next 7 generations!
How did this become an issue relating to the government?
Sunny I believe it was President Bush who was in charge when all of the economic problems started happening. By time President Obama came into office there were few options he had to ensure the economic problems he inheritedwould became worse.
Where is your respect for the Office of the President?
27 September 2009
at 11:47 a.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
Geez toliet paper is toliet paper one ply should be good enough!
—
****Mildly graphic but apparently somebody has to say it because it's not just about 'behinds'.****
TP Anatomy 201
I feel that those who make this statement need to be inserted into female forms with female needs 24/7/a lifetime..plus caring for the needs of children of both sexes and seeing the difference it makes for both during those years. The anatomy is different.
The cheap stuff shreds, not doing it's job, some gets left behind in folds, can cause sores as it's rough, and also due to the ammoniacal decomposition of urine that occurs in almost all urine after voiding . The ammonia burns the mucous membranes and creates odor (not to mention picking the torn sticking shreds of paper out that they can't see down there grossing them out).
A unnecessary hassle, when with something as simple as a better product solves the problem by not falling apart in tight crevices.
Also note, we sit our behinds on very small oval holes. With our behinds getting larger and larger, those crevices are getting tighter, all those folds for both men and women squeezed more tightly upon a small area. Like a road cut through a mountain pass, makes it harder for that paper to be pulled through those passes when people are in a hurry. More drag.That tissue has got to be able to hold up.
The cheap stuff just doesn't do it.
(Years of caring for a few people's personal medical needs makes me able to define these problems with this level of thought in case you're wondering)
I'm not advocating some 3 ply circus extravaganza. But I lived with a husband who sold 'premium business grade' toilet paper through his company and he insisted that was what we used. A couple of different types, all thin, some recycled. In his words, “good stuff!” “best they carried”, 4 star.
The stuff was miserable. Having toilet trained one child with regular TP before..I knew the difference in performance. On rare occasion I saw particles hard and long enough that when we dug things like that out of our fingers…we called them splinters
Men, you want to put a lot of strikes against your marriage?
Demand your wife buy this stuff. Every time she even looks at toilet paper, she'll grow to hate you.
My girlfriend said the same for cheap kitchen trash bags once.
He said, 'I just can see spending money on something that's just going to be thrown away!”
She said, “Every time that cheap bag he insists I buy rips and I have to pick up the mess off the floor, I just want to put one over his head at night!”
I told her..”Be sure to use two”
:)
27 September 2009
at 11:57 a.m.
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Boosh (Anonymous) says…
Multidisciplinary said “Like a road cut through a mountain pass…”
Oh gods help me! I can't get that imagery out a me head!
27 September 2009
at 3:48 p.m.
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Multidisciplinary (Anonymous) says…
Thanks Boosh!
;)
27 September 2009
at 4:09 p.m.
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denak (Anonymous) says…
“…Mexicans and many other under-developed nations don't flush toilet paper (if they even use a toilet). What have I been telling you about drifting toward third-worldness?…”
One, Mexicans do use toilet paper. Two, in some areas of Mexico, the reason toilet paper is not flushed is due to the lousy plumbing system. Even in Mexico City, in some of the finer hotels, you will see signs that asks you to please put the toilet paper in the trash can that is next to the toilet. Mexicans are just as concerned with hygiene as Americans are. Maybe Tom, if you would actually go there, you would find this out instead of making baseless generalizations about people.
Two, as for men douching. I don't think this is a good idea. It isn't even a good idea for women to douche so I really don't see why men would. Any doctors out there who could tell us why a man would have to douche?
Personally, I use the 2 ply/store brand stuff. I don't really see the reason to buy 3 ply. Much more expensive. However, I had an acquaintance once that would bring her own toilet paper to people's houses. She absolutely refused to use anything other than 3 ply. I don't see her sitting down on this issue. :)
Dena
27 September 2009
at 6:34 p.m.
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TomShewmon (Tom Shewmon) says…
Hey Dena, we've been to villas umteen times in Mexico and always been told not to flush TP…..I'm quite aware of the plumbing down there, and thanks for validating the third world thing. And, I always flush my TP when I'm there, I don't care–-not my problem. I don't want to look at used TP in the trash can. At $1500/week, I'm flushing my TP.
27 September 2009
at 10:14 p.m.
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Godot (Anonymous) says…
We should all carry bottles of warm epsom salt water to cleanse ourselves, and learn to shake, vigorously, after the cleansing. I can see many benefits, including the calories burned by carrying the extra weight of the water, the muscle development of the quads and gluts from hovering over the elimination pit, plus the positive effect on the obliques from the side-to-side shaking movement.
A mini-personal fan, solar powered, of course, would be a boon. Perhaps we could power this fan while carrying it on our backs as we walk to and from work and shopping,
27 September 2009
at 11:56 p.m.
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RKLOG (Mark Andrew) says…
tumbilweed (Anonymous) says…
“I think the reason why the above don't care is they all already have grandchildren. ”
Thanks Tumbilweed, I agree.