Farmingdale, N.Y. ? There are things that even the great Tiger Woods can’t control.

Rain, for one, but he’s not alone. Had the USGA known what a mess the heavens would make of this U.S. Open, it would have taken the millions it put into Bethpage Black and used it to build a course somewhere in the Mojave desert.

Then again, had the USGA known that putting Woods in the opening pairings Thursday morning would have caused such havoc on the leaderboard, it surely would have moved him to the afternoon where he would have the proper conditions to defend his title. As great as he may be, even Woods isn’t nearly that interesting when he’s 11 shots out of the lead.

That doesn’t mean NBC won’t find a way to show him every five minutes today as the Open marathon hopefully draws to a close. Who knows, Woods may even get more airtime than Al Roker, who made his way up to Bethpage on Saturday to drone on incessantly about weather but was mysteriously missing by the time rain finally came.

What it does mean is that Woods won’t be jetting home with any new hardware from this Open. He’s too far back, there are too many people in front of him, and, as great as he is, he’s never come from behind on Sunday to win a major championship.

Bethpage is also playing way too easy so, even if the remaining field wanted to collapse at the sound of Woods’ gallery, they would have to find some new and imaginative ways to do so.

This, of course, was supposed to be the week Woods made a triumphant return to the site of his 2002 Open win and edged closer to Jack Nicklaus with his 15th major championship. With his knee finally healed and his drives finally finding the fairways, there seemed little the other 155 players could do but watch in awe.

Nicklaus himself predicted it would happen after Woods made birdies on the final two holes two weeks ago to win the Memorial.

“If he drives the ball this way, and plays this way, I’m sure it will,” Nicklaus said. “And if not, it will surprise me greatly.”

Nicklaus isn’t the only one surprised. Woods arrived here Monday in full swagger, confident in his swing and eager to add to a collection of major trophies second only to the 18 won by Nicklaus.

Oddsmakers made him a prohibitive favorite. His fellow players fell all over themselves deferring to his greatness.

Then the rain came, and everything changed. Woods was out of this U.S. Open almost before he had a chance to get in.

Barring some miracle, he’ll leave New York still stuck at 14 major titles and be without a major in his possession for the first time in four years. He’s still relatively young at 33, but each year that goes by without winning one of the big four will make it more difficult for him to accomplish the ultimate goal of his remarkable career, which is to win more majors than Nicklaus.

Woods said earlier this week that Nicklaus was still the greatest player of all time for that reason alone.

“He’s got 18,” Woods said. “I’m at 14.”

That’s the way Woods keeps score. And that’s why, for him, this Open will almost certainly be tallied up as a big fat zero.