Wes: I saw a quote from Einstein the other day pondering the idea that our technology has surpassed our humanity. So it goes.

As personal technologies have become commonplace in our daily lives, even the most tech-savvy of us have to step back and remember that 20 years ago, primitive desktop computers were just gaining a foothold in business and cell phones were big, expensive and owned by just 1 million subscribers in the United States. Cheap technology has so grown in the past few years — what once were dreams are now expectations.

In the coming months, we’ll explore how to introduce children and younger teens to these technologies using early education, good management strategies and guidelines for ethical use. Too often parents begin handing out new gadgets to the delight of their children, without fully appreciating what they’re getting into. Since you go from where you start, these columns will hopefully get families off to a more productive relationship to the information age from day one.

The age of first use of cell phones has been dropping to the point that many elementary students now have them. Here, I see parents making two major mistakes. First, they adopt the idea that their child must have a cell phone, either because the child pulls the “everyone has one” card or because phones really are very convenient for overseeing kids. In fact, I’ve long proposed that kids can have a little more freedom if they’re willing to use cell phones to keep parents informed of their movements. However, an exaggerated sense of necessity can easily pressure parents into making choices they later regret in how the phone is used and paid for. This leads directly to the second mistake.

Many parents wait until problems arise to try and set guidelines for phone use. This creates a titanic conflict as the family now tries to pry the phone out of the clinched, sobbing grip of their child because they ran over their minutes or texted a naked picture to friends during school time (no really … this happens more than you think). If you begin with the idea that a cell phone is a great luxury that can be taken away at any point for misuse, then the incentive for proper use is present from day one.

Parents also will find that cell phones have replaced stuffed animals as nighttime companions. When we were young, parents didn’t allow calls after, say, 9 p.m. That rule seems to have gone out the window and must be immediately called back to service. When handing out cell phones, make it clear that all chargers remain in the master bedroom and all phones are hooked up for charging overnight. Those rules will bend as kids get closer to 18, but the base assumption should be that phones are dead at night.

If there is any restriction on minutes, teach kids to use the automated system to check what they have, and to do so religiously. While unlimited plans have helped, there are still horror stories of $350 bills for kids who simply haven’t yet developed time management skills.

I’d also suggest considering your child’s request for texting. This is a cheap add-on and it will generally keep usage of minutes down. However, texting is one of the most abused forms of telecommunication especially during school hours. Another starting guideline needs to be that misuse of the phone during school hours (as determined by the school) is grounds for suspension of the service. Remember, that only takes about three minutes to accomplish, and your child should be made painfully aware of that fact.

Kelly: It’s weird to see how such a small device like a cell phone can have such a powerful impact on the lives of both parents and children. Parents see it as way of keeping tabs on their children. For kids, cell phone usage is quite different. Nowadays, it seems as though children waste a lot of their energy on technology, substituting it for many of the physical activities life has to offer. I am afraid children are slowly but surely moving away from many of the important social skills we learn by face-to-face communication because they depend so much on their phones.

Even at the high school level, cell phone usage has become somewhat abused. Students (including me) are guilty of sneaking a text to a friend while the teachers are not looking. If the teacher does find it, chances are it will be confiscated. And then there are the teachers who are themselves guilty of cell phone usage but have no problem trying to hide it from their students. Yet we students are the only ones who face the consequences. That’s life for you.

As Wes said, integrating cell phone usage into your child’s life is a hard thing to do, and caution is necessary when doing so. It’s greatly important to lay down the ground rules before bestowing your kids with a phone. Tell them the details of your cell phone usage plan and what you will expect of them. Let them know if at any time it does become a problem, you will take it away. But also let them know that as they succeed with this, you are moving them up on the trust ladder. There are some children who will abuse such power by going over minutes or engaging in the latest awful craze of “sexting.”

Please don’t consider the cell phone as a way to spy on your children. I don’t feel it is necessary to “snoop” on your children and what they’re doing at all times, but monitoring once in a while is OK. Your children are entitled to their privacy as much as you’re entitled to yours.

Next week: When too much is never enough. Getting started with video and computer games.