Simple, huh? A guy runs a stellar basketball program, wins two more league championships and the national title and deserves a new contract to keep Oklahoma State wolves at bay. Write it up, boost the pay and benefits to match other headline coaches’ goodies, throw in nifty bonuses and incentives and get it signed. It’s not that easy.

KU’s Bill Self had a number of caveats in mind like longevity, improved facilities and such in addition to all the usual glittering gains. Then what about making it certain the arrangement will stand up even if current throne-dwellers aren’t around?

Chancellor Robert Hemenway and athletic director Lew Perkins are 65-ish types who may not be on the scene 10 or 15 years down the line when Self still wants to be. Hemenway plans to teach after he leaves Strong Hall. What might a new chancellor decide?

Perkins has a $650,000 annual package plus an unlimited expense account and other benefits. He also has a $1.3 million bonus, tax-free, I’m told, if he fulfills a six-year contract ending June of 2009. How likely is it that Perkins, despite the perks, will spend another 10 years in his high-pressure job?

It’s no mystery why Hemenway, Perkins, Self and high-powered attorneys like the noted Rick Evrard have issues to resolve before Self has all the things he wants and deserves. Mandatory is a longevity clause that extends beyond the tenures of Bob and Lew. Evrard is a sharp attorney, a former NCAA enforcement expert, who worked with Perkins at UConn.

Rick also helped Perkins pull strings to keep KU from getting more severe penalties than it got in October, 2006. Escaping from that “lack of institutional oversight” thicket as well as KU did speaks volumes about the acumen of Perkins and Evrard.

So Self is involved with getting a new contract that also takes good care of his staff and makes their six-figure packages even niftier. When women’s basketball coach Bonnie Henrickson has a $635,000 annual take with marginal productivity up to now, you know Self will make sure his guys are generously remunerated.

Lordy, the Magna Carta was easier to wring out of the evil King John in 1215 than a contract deal this complicated. No wonder it’s taking a while to finalize it. Look how long it took West Virginia to form a 10-year, $20 million bundle for Bob Huggins after he walked out on naive, too-trusting K-State?

Do lawyers rule the world?

Sometimes it seems that when folks in the KU athletic department have things moving along fairly smoothly, they form an emergency committee to determine just what unique new gimmick KUAC can devise to tick off the populace. Now comes that $6,400 KU is seeking from the chamber of commerce and Downtown Lawrence for cancellation of a basketball honor event at the Holidome. Hell, you might find that much spare change sweeping out Perkins’ office every week! Have they no shame?

The New Order has accomplished many notable things and has a fabulous chance to surf on a wave of good feeling created by the football-basketball successes. Yet for all their expertise in other areas, sometimes The Suits seem to go out of their way to flunk an important test in image-repair and improved public relations.