Don’t be that one guest at your friend’s wedding
Everyone loves a wedding. Who can resist the love in the air, dancing all night long, and an open bar? Although the bride and groom want you to have the time of your life, it doesn’t mean you should. Bringing an unexpected guest and getting too tipsy are just a few of the seven deadly guest sins. Follow our tips to wedding etiquette so you don’t end up making a guest gaffe.
1. Invitations
Put your best foot forward as soon as you’re officially invited. The first step in the long process leading up to the wedding is to make a decision about going (especially for destination weddings) and return the card as soon as possible. Most RSVP cards have a deadline date – never return the card late or not at all! Take careful note of whose name is on the card. Unless it has “and guest,” you may not bring a date, and don’t ask to bring one either; this applies to pre-wedding parties as well. The bride and groom worked hard on the guest list and didn’t leave anyone off by mistake.
2. Pre-wedding Parties
Showers, rehearsal dinners and bachelor/bachelorette parties are filled with excitement, but don’t get too carried away. Even if the rules are slightly more lax, you should still be on your best behavior. Don’t reveal anything inappropriate about the bride or groom in front of friends and family. Just because you think it’s funny, it doesn’t mean that others will. Secondly, asking to see the ring is one thing – asking to try it on is quite another. Never ask the bride if you can try on her engagement ring; it’s a special token that means a lot to her, and your request could come off as rude or just plain tacky.
3. Ceremony
The ceremony is the most important part of the wedding. While the bride and groom are exchanging their vows, there shouldn’t be any disruptions. Don’t text on your phone or talk to the person next you, and if you find yourself in the middle of a coughing fit or sneezing attack, leave the premises immediately. You should always arrive on time, and if you’re late, stand in the back so you don’t interrupt the ceremony. Most importantly, don’t skip the ceremony and then attend the reception.
4. Reception
It’s OK to let loose at the reception … within reason. Don’t take advantage of an open bar and drink too much. This can only lead to further disasters like X-rated dancing, giving an impromptu drunken toast, or worse. Pace yourself throughout the night and remember to eat, dance and have fun – minus any horrifying gaffes.
5. Attire
Following a wedding dress code can be complicated, but there are a few rules that you should always adhere to. Under no circumstances should you wear any variation of white – including ivory or cream. You don’t want to take any attention away from the bride by donning a similar color. Also, don’t come underdressed or wear something too revealing. When in doubt, opt for a simple, knee-length, cocktail dress unless otherwise stated on the invitation. Avoid dresses that are too short, tight or low-cut.
6. Gifting
Although you already bought the couple a shower gift, it doesn’t mean you’re exempt from giving a wedding present. Guests should give a wedding gift regardless if they attend or not. If you do attend the wedding, don’t bring the present with you; instead, ship it to the couple’s home. When choosing a gift, always use their registry – it’s there for a reason.
7. Destination Weddings
Whether you’re flying just outside the United States or halfway around the world, there are a few things to keep in mind when attending a destination wedding. Always be prepared. Have your passport, ID, plane tickets, hotel confirmation, money, prescriptions and toiletries (make sure they’re packed in FAA-approved containers). Secondly, don’t complain about the destination or the price of the trip. Calculate how much it’ll cost you, leaving room for emergencies, and decide whether it’s feasible or not.