Disastrous dates 101
Lawrence artist writes complete guide to Mr. Wrong
If you don’t have hot Valentine’s Day plans, seek solace in this: A night of eating ice cream on the couch would be better than Aleah Menefee’s first date.
She was 15, and everything was wrong.
The guy was wrong. (He was wearing workout shorts and a sleeveless shirt that revealed his scrawny arms.)
The date movie was wrong. (“Rush Hour 2,” not exactly romantic.)
And, as a bonus, her father was in tow.
“I was so excited because this guy asked me out on a date to go to the movies,” says Menefee, now a junior at Kansas University. “Well, long story short, (my dad) ends up saying, ‘If you’re going on a date, so am I.’ So he sits two rows behind me at the movies, eating his popcorn and drinking his sodas.”
This is the kind of story that gets Jo Renfro scribbling down notes.
Renfro, a freelance artist in Lawrence, is author of “The Big Book of Bad Dates: The Not-So Good, the Very Bad & the Butt Ugly” ($12.95, Sellers Publishing). The book, which came out this week, features caricatures of men she and others have dated through the years, both through illustrations and captions that explain the men.
A 2008 tear-off calendar featuring 315 of the characters was released last year.
“I got all my friends to help me” come up with categories, Renfro says. “Over margaritas, we were hashing them out, and I’d scribble down notes.”
Some examples:
¢ “The Has-Been” – “He’s living in the past – his old football glory days – even though that was 15 years and 75 pounds ago.”
¢ “The Desperado” – “Really wants a ‘mate.’ He’s an instant boyfriend. Just add water. As long as you’re a living, breathing female, you’re the gal for him!”
¢ “The Bad Boy” – “He drives too fast, never calls when he says he will (if he calls at all), and barely remembers our name. Of course, we love this guy.”
Renfro, a lifelong Lawrence resident, is a 48-year-old, divorced mother of three. She says she drew on her recent dating experiences the last eight years in creating her characters – though she wonders what effect it might have on dating in the future.
“I thought I’d never have a date again because of these guys (in the book),” she says.
Now, her gauge of a good date is this: “I think, ‘You know, I can’t think of anything to use this guy as material.'”
She interspersed the book with dating “tips,” such as how to fake a dropped cell phone call when you don’t want to be talking to a prospective date.
She’s already working on new guy characters for the 2009 “Year of Bad Dates” calendar.
The thing that makes the book funny, Renfro says, is how universal it is – nearly everyone can remember a bad date.
A male friend asked her if she planned to do caricatures of women as well. She laughed and jokingly said she thought women were too perfect to be bad dates.
If that ever comes about, KU freshman Sam Anderson has a nomination for his own worst date. It happened in high school, when he took a girl to an outdoor concert that might as well have been a mud-wrestling match.
“We went back to her house to clean up,” Anderson recalls. “It turned out when we got there that her parents had no idea what she was doing and didn’t have any idea who I was. And so we basically walked in and got the house disgustingly muddy. Made the nice, clean, white bathroom incredibly dirty.
“They took it well enough, but I could tell they were kind of perturbed.”
Had a bad date?
Tell us all about your own crummy dates in the comment section below.

