Helping me find my own way home

Randy Beeman, pastor at First Christian Church, 1000 Ky.:

I think there are a lot of things that can help us feel far from God: Relationship problems with family or friends, financial problems, loneliness, challenges in our career, illness and more. Sometimes we can become so angry that we don’t want to have anything to do with God. We may still believe in God, but we don’t want any kind of intimate relationship with God. When I felt far from God I knew what I needed in my life, but something held me back from accepting God’s love – my stubbornness and reluctance to change. I think sometimes it is difficult to believe that God can forgive us for the things we have done in life and accept us back into God’s love.

Some of the things that brought me back to a close relationship with God were good friends who encouraged me and held me accountable, learning to be honest with God about my struggles, reading the Bible and applying God’s truth to my daily life, being in worship with other people on the journey of faith, listening to people who give godly counsel, forgiving myself and accepting God’s love and forgiveness.

Finally what helped me find my way home to God was to understand the difference between facts and feelings. I may have felt far away from God, but was I really? God has said, “I will never leave you or forsake you.” Jesus also said, “Surely I am with you always, even until the end of the age.” I am thankful now that my relationship with God is not based on my feelings, which change from day to day, but on the fact that God is always with me and with you if you simply ask.

– E-mail Randy Beeman at rbeeman@sunflower.com.

Small in size, but not at all insignificant

Eileen Stulak, spiritual leader, Unity Church of Lawrence, 900 Madeline Lane:

For many years I saw God as being somewhere off in the distance, so God often felt far away. Yet, I always believed it was possible to be in a relationship with God.

As the years passed, the yearning to have that spiritual relationship grew deeper in my heart, but its realization seemed completely out of reach. This inner disconnect affected many areas of my life as well.

At a time when a significant relationship was coming to an end, I decided to vacation for a week along the New England coast. I spent my days sitting on the rocky coastline, simply staring at the vast body of water that was before me. I prayed that I would somehow know God in an unmistakable way. It was during my time of quiet reflection that I indeed became aware of what had been the missing piece in my relationship with God.

I came to understand that as I had looked out at the “bigness” of everything around me, I had in turn seen myself as being very small and unimportant. But one afternoon I realized that although I may be small in size, I was not insignificant. I was as integral a part in the overall creation of God as every inch of the ocean that was before me. It was in that moment that I entered into the truest relationship with God I had ever felt. I felt as if Spirit had said, “I’m right here and always will be.”

Whenever I feel removed from God, I simply think of my time in New England, and my spirit and I reconnect and continue our walk together.

– E-mail Eileen Stulak at eileen@unityoflawrence.org.