People who think their social lives won’t change after having children are at best delusional.

Embrace the horror – intimate wine-and-cheese dinner parties that stretch into the night are quickly replaced by peanut-butter-and-jelly demands and sippy cups.

But Lauren Bank Deen believes there is a middle ground. Her recent cookbook, “Kitchen Playdates,” sets out strategies for reclaiming some of your social life, with children in tow.

The book offers suggestions for a variety of playdates that let you be an adult and a parent, from a simple pizza party (everyone builds his own) to a dinner-swap date in which everyone helps make meals for later in the week.

Each playdate includes lists of suggested recipes, and each recipe includes tips for getting the children involved (there also is a whole chapter dedicated to this).