Q: My sister can get fired or quit and have a new job within weeks. I, however, have been looking for nearly a year. My sister says she never tells prospective employers that she was fired because they can verify only whether or not you worked at the company. Is this true, and would you recommend it? It seems dishonest, but I am the one still looking for employment. – Shon

A: Kate: On the employment application, in the “reason for leaving” box, you should not state that you were fired. That’s way too harsh. Instead, write, “Prefer to explain in person,” and then have a good story. Why were you fired? Most times, it’s impersonal. That is, the company was downsizing and you were caught in it, or you worked for a boss who fired everybody. What’s your story?

Dale: Yes, have a story, but if I’m the manager and I see “prefer to explain in person,” I roll my eyes and put the application in the reject pile. Who’s going to volunteer to hear someone’s tale of woe?

Instead, I’d put on the application some cliche like, “Left to pursue other opportunities.” Is that true? Absolutely. You just leave out the part about the hand in the middle of your back, pushing you out. In the interview, you can say, “I was planning to leave, but they beat me to it.” Or, “It wasn’t a good fit, and they did me the favor of pointing that out to me.” Then you smile, explain what you’ve learned from the experience and how you’re determined to find the right place to be the great employee you can be.

Kate: As for what your ex-employer can and cannot say about you, it depends on the state you’re in. So perhaps your sister is right. It seems to work for her, so maybe you should take her advice. If you find yourself obsessing about what the old company is saying about you, you can get someone to call them and say, “I’m calling for employment verification,” and see just what they are telling people.

Dale: I’m betting you’ll find that your old employer is not the problem. That’s when you can ask yourself what else your sister is doing that makes a job search easy for her. Get her to role-play with you, and perhaps you, too, can breeze into a new job.