Archive for Monday, May 15, 2006

Diverse mothers

May 15, 2006


To the editor:

As a daughter, and the mother of five grown children, I appreciate the Lawrence Journal-World's special section May 7 honoring mothers.

However, I was dismayed by the photo on the front of that section. The picture of two hands entwined was, I'm sure, intended to represent a mother holding the hand of her child, and the reader knew which hand was the mother's because it wore a traditional wedding ring on its third finger.

The message seemed to be that all mothers are involved in traditional marriages, but I have no doubt that at least a few of the letters printed in that section were written by the loving, appreciative children of devoted mothers who no longer wear a wedding ring, or who never wore one.

Not all mothers are in traditional marriages, whether by choice or by circumstance. Women experience motherhood in a number of ways: as women who are in traditional straight marriages, as women whose husbands have died, as women who are divorced, as women who choose not to be in any kind of partnership, and as lesbians who (in most states and countries) are not permitted to legally marry their partners, to name a few. Narrowing the criteria for motherhood to include traditional marriage excludes many women who deserve honor and recognition.

I hope the choice of that particular photo had to do with a lack of sensitivity rather than a not-so-subtle message about motherhood.

Kami Day,



Kelly Powell 12 years ago

Could you reach a little farther to be offended? Should some one complain because the hands were not the appropiate color to them? Or the mothers hand was slim, therefore being insensitive to morbidly obese mothers?i did not see a tattoo or a skull and barbwire bracelet.....should punkrockers write in at the offensive omission to their subculture? Looking at the picture I see a totally differant scenario....The mother is not holding the daughters hand in a loving embrace, but is dragging the little brat out of a restaraunt for having a tantrum, and is taking her to the restroom to administer a savage beating with a clothshanger.....Somebody should get offended and call SRS...........

classclown 12 years ago

I agree rednekbuddha. What we have here is not a case of insensitivity on the part of LJW, but rather over sensitivity on the part of Kami Day.

KsjKC 12 years ago

I choose not to wear a ring at all--- but am a blissfully, happily married man.

I am filing away this potential snub and adding it to the text of the Letter to The Editor I'm working on for Father's Day... my barely-concealed outrage may not contain itself until mid-June.

PS--That was sarcasm, Kami. Do we need to start dealing with the heinous bigotry of international symbols for restrooms? I for one know of lots of women who never wear skirts and may take umbrage at that kind of short-sightedness...

bankboy119 12 years ago

I found it offensive that they showed the hand at all. Women should be covered from head to toe with only their eyes being revealed. Even their eyes should be covered with a veil. How insensitive to show skin.

craigers 12 years ago

And what about mothers that have lost their finger? The LJWorld is heartless.

GardenMomma 12 years ago

I wasn't offended. I am also not the "traditional" mother.

Being offended about a picture of two hands, one with a wedding ring is too much.

Perhaps the ring in the picture was not a "traditional" wedding ring. Why does Ms. Day assume that the ring in the picture is a ring symbolizing marriage between a man and a woman?

bearded_gnome 12 years ago

Kami Day's name, pronounced same as the french word for "comedy" made me wonder if this is even a real person, or a put-up-job with a fake name!

if not, dial 1-800-pcpolice for more! whatta load of krapp! what about the use of a picture at all...that discriminates against: blind; dyslexic; the agraphic; etc. so, how dare they even use a picture!

bearded_gnome 12 years ago

oh, btw, the hands are gripping thus unrepresentative of paraplegic and quadraplegic moms and kids!


Commenting has been disabled for this item.