Miracles happen every day on television. But the most loaded word in “Ordinary Miracles” (8 p.m. today, Hallmark) is “Ordinary.” Jaclyn Smith’s character in the film, Judge Kay Woodbury, is right out of “Ordinary People” by way of “Judging Amy.” She’s a no-nonsense gavel-pounder whose sense of professional rectitude and obligation blots out most human contact. Her ex-husband (Corbin Bernsen) bails out on her workaholic schedule, and the prissy Miss Kay stops speaking to her own lawyer father when he crosses her code of ethics. Smith’s Kay combines girl-next-door beauty with a brittle distance. She’s Sally Field channeling Martha Stewart.

Kay’s life changes when circumstances (don’t ask) compel her to temporarily adopt surly but brilliant teen Sally Powell (Lyndsy Fonseca), who has been bounced all over the foster care system. Kay also feels obligated to find the girl’s biological father, resulting in a seismic wave of emotional interference with many aftershocks.

To call “Miracles” contrived is no “Ordinary” understatement. Things aren’t helped by the movie’s glacial pace. Judge Kay pores over computer screens and legal briefs in real time. The sets and scenery also make the most of Kay’s detachment. In the languid opening scenes, she moves from a vast empty house to a California courthouse devoid of people, as if she were detonating emotional neutron bombs in her wake. Later, she shops for solace and drives a Mercedes, leaving one to wonder just what they’re paying judges these days.

Today’s highlights

• Fans of “College Hill” (noon, BET), a “reality” series set at an Oklahoma university, can watch a 12-episode marathon in advance of the series’ May 12 season finale.
• Mike Joy, Darrell Waltrip and Larry McReynolds announce the Darlington 500 NASCAR race (6 p.m., Fox).
• Matthew Modine guest stars on “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit” (8 p.m., NBC).
• Johnny Knoxville is host on “Saturday Night Live” (10:30 p.m., NBC), featuring musical guests System of a Down.

Sunday’s highlights

• On back-to-back episodes of “The Simpsons” (Fox), Krusty’s idol time (7 p.m.), Homer says sooth (7:30 p.m.).
• A fireman needs a home for his five kids on “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” (7 p.m., ABC).
• Passions ebb on “Desperate Housewives” (8 p.m., ABC).
• “Elvis” lives (8 p.m., CBS).
• A high-tech game with human targets on “Law & Order: Criminal Intent” (8 p.m., NBC).
• Drinking on the job on “Grey’s Anatomy” (9 p.m., ABC).