In the home that Karen Hunter and the Rev. Pat Gallagher share in East Haddam, Conn., a photo of a smiling Bishop V. Gene Robinson sits on a shelf in a bright, open meditation room with large windows and a comfortable sofa.

Before her decision to come out as a lesbian, Gallagher visited Robinson, who would become the first openly gay bishop to serve in the U.S. Episcopal Church.

“He spoke with me for hours, and he basically said, ‘Hold your head up high, and don’t be ashamed.’ And I listened to him and thought, ‘That’s right. That’s the way it should be.’ And that’s what we do.”

Gallagher is among a few openly gay priests in the Episcopal Diocese of Connecticut, which has seen its share of turmoil since Robinson’s consecration as bishop of New Hampshire in 2003. Six conservative parishes in this state have been seeking to break away from the authority of Bishop Andrew Smith, who voted in support of Robinson’s election.

In a rebuke to the U.S. Episcopal Church, a commission of the Anglican Communion issued a report in October demanding that the Episcopal Church apologize for its elevation of Robinson.

As Gallagher’s partner, Hunter has had a somewhat unique position to view their personal struggle as a couple and the larger struggle of the Episcopal Church. Her book, “Gay Priest & the Woman Who Loves Her” (Wicwas Press) was self-published last month.

“I wrote this book so that our story would increase awareness of the struggle gay couples go through, particularly when one is a priest,” Hunter says, adding that “our story is a little unusual in that way.”

Inspirational intentions

When Hunter, 50, grew up in Hartford, Conn., her childhood home was just a few doors away from the Episcopal Diocesan House on Asylum Avenue. Her father, a music conductor, despised organized religion yet played in church every Sunday as the organist, an experience Hunter says gave her a longing for faith. Hunter has been divorced twice and is the mother of two teenagers.

Gallagher, 58, who was raised Catholic on Manhattan’s Lower East Side, was ordained an Episcopal priest in 1990. She was married 32 years and is the mother of five grown children and grandmother of nine. Hunter and Gallagher, who met nearly a decade ago, have been together seven years and had their union blessed at a Congregational Church.

The Rev. Pat Gallagher leads Sunday services at St. Paul's Episcopal Church in Willimantic, Conn. Gallagher, who has been at the church for about two months, is the subject of a book entitled A

The book tells the couple’s story in an episodic way: Gallagher’s loss of her parish in Waterbury, Conn., when she discloses to the bishop that she is gay; the shock, anger and eventual reconciliation among some of Gallagher’s family members; Gallagher’s return to parish work; and the creation of the Sanctuary, a spiritual retreat center in East Haddam with a special ministry for gay, bisexual and transgender people.

“I wrote the book because I hoped it would help people whose children won’t speak to them or whose families are in pain over this, hoping they can take inspiration from our story,” Hunter says. “It was written with some measure of frustration, both with organized religion and with people who are closed and won’t hear. Maybe the bishop will hear, maybe parents with gay children they won’t talk to will hear.”

The book does not identify by name people in the Connecticut diocese, but some, such as Smith, can be identified by their role. The book also refers to discussion meetings of a gay clergy group, most of them still in the closet.

“I hoped (the book) would raise awareness in the diocese, too, among priests who are openly gay to our group but who won’t be openly gay in their parishes,” Hunter says.