Some of you grizzled, long-in-the-toothers may remember a syndicated newspaper feature called the Bottom Ten. A sarcastic weekly take-off on Top Ten rankings, it rated the worst college football teams in the country.

Readers loved the tongue-in-cheek dark humor, while coaches of teams that made the Bottom Ten were not amused. Today, you can find a version of the Bottom Ten on the Web at ESPN.com, but the original newspaper feature is long gone.

In that vein, though, with everyone debating whether Oklahoma or Southern Cal is No. 1, few care who is No. 117 — the worst team in NCAA Div. I-A.

Surprisingly, the answer is clear-cut, because only one of the 117 teams in the top NCAA division has failed to win at least one game. It’s Central Florida. The Golden Knights are 0-5.

Not that many of the schools with just one victory are much better.

Arkansas State, for example, is 1-5, and the Indians’ lone victory is over Louisiana-Monroe, a 1-4 team whose only win was a two-point triumph over 1-5 Idaho, whose only win was over Eastern Michigan.

Among the bigger names, consider that Arizona (1-4) has defeated only Northern Arizona, and Washington (1-4) can claim only San Jose State as a victim, while San Jose State has only that improbable 70-63 shootout over Rice in the W column.

Among the other weak one-win teams are Mississippi State (did the Bulldogs really lose to Maine?), SMU, Ball State, Temple, East Carolina and Kentucky.

Then there’s Troy State. Remember when the Trojans made national headlines by stunning Missouri, 24-14, in that Thursday night TV game? The next time out, Troy (2-2) lost to New Mexico State, a perennial punching bag.

6Sports video: KU’s quarterback quandary KU adds defensive player

Kansas University, as you know, is idle this week, but the Wanna Whack Woodling? contest isn’t. I’m still picking, so you can keep whacking. All you have to do is go to the Web at KUsports.com, hit the prompts and enter. You could win a tony We Whacked Woodling T-shirt and be all the rage at a Halloween party.

Here are this week’s selections, with a bonus pick thrown in to replace the vacationing Jayhawks:

Oklahoma 27, Kansas State 23 — Sooners favored by nearly three touchdowns, but Wildcats will make it close. K-State’s Darren Sproles will outshine OU super freshman Adrian Peterson, but Sooners have edge at QB with Heisman Trophy incumbent Jason White.

Colorado 7, Iowa State 3 — Buffaloes going with James Cox at QB, hoping he has more success than the James Cox who lost 1920 Presidential election to Warren G. Harding. Iowa State can’t score against tall grass.

Nebraska 70, Baylor 10 — Just what barely breathing Baylor needed, Nebraska in Lincoln, Neb., following the worst loss in NU history. Cornhuskers ask no quarter and give no quarter, turning Bears into sacrificial lambs.

Texas 41, Missouri 20 — Tigers proved they could win on road last Saturday, but Texas isn’t Baylor. Longhorns still smarting from shutout loss to Oklahoma and are likely to smash MU quarterback Brad Smith to smithereens.

Oklahoma State 33, Texas A&M 29 — This one is almost a wash. A&M averaging 429.6 yards a game, OSU 407.6. Each team surrendering 337.0 yards per game. Home field decisive factor. Score would be reversed if game was in College Station, Texas.

Toledo 60, Ohio 13 — Bonus pick. Remember the Rockets? Toledo surrendered 63 points to both Minnesota and KU in its first two games, but the Holys have now won four straight by averaging 50 points a game. Bobcats (3-3) can’t be relishing this road trip.