The conciliatory Dale Carnegie might have smacked him in the mouth, peaceful Mother Teresa might have rapped his knuckles with a ruler and lots of people would love to erase that smirk from his face.

But for some odd reason, I admire Steve Spurrier and hope he has a great debut as Washington Redskins football coach. Got interested in the guy when he was winning the Heisman Trophy as Florida’s quarterback in 1966; been intrigued at the 122-27-2 success he had in 12 years as Gator coach. Steve took over for Martinet Marty Schottenheimer, now San Diego Charger drill sergeant. They say he’s loosened things up trying to install his Fun-and-Gun style.

Spurrier’s successor at Florida is Ron Zook, a Kansas assistant under Mike Gottfried in 1983. Florida fans say Zook works much harder than the golf-loving Spurrier. Steve replies: “No question, coach Zook works harder than I do. Well he works more hours than I do. Will he win more games? Hope he does well.”

Not much for small talk and cuddliness, Spurrier is considered by opponents as cocky, arrogant, ruthless, a tyrant, whose sideline headgear-tossing earned him the label of Darth Visor. At arch-rival Florida State, the coach is the folksy, chatty, affable Bobby Bowden. Talk about hero and villain images.

Spurrier has a sharp, biting wit and loved to harpoon FSU. Florida State was involved in a scandal with players going on shopping sprees at Foot Locker, courtesy of boosters. Spurrier barbed: “Now you know what FSU stands for: Free Shoes University.”

Then Steve wondered about the shiny new cars in the FSU players’ parking lot: “I’m not saying anybody broke any rules; I’m just saying there is a feeling of, well, those kids are driving awfully nice cars. How’s it happen?”

After hearing a fire in the Auburn University athletic dorm burned a batch of books, Spurrier quipped: “The real shame was that over half of them hadn’t even been colored yet.” Any wonder non-Florida fans consider him The Evil Genius, a paranoid dictator?

Southeastern Conference coaches are glad to see Spurrier gone for two reasons: Tired of being beaten so often and the fact Spurrier was the No. 1 whistle-blower in the league. He’d would turn in, at the drop of a visor, anyone he considered cheating. That alone would put me on his side, since the running joke is that SEC stands for “Surely, Everybody’s Cheating.”

The SEC cannot be proud of the fact it has had more major NCAA rules violations (42) than any conference on the planet. Nearly half the members are on probation or are being investigated.

Spurrier is openly proud of his watchdog reputation. He admits he contacted the NCAA about Alabama, which recently drew a five-year probation. He’s glad to get out from under that load.

“It got a little old being the only policemen in the league,” Spurrier told Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel. “Sometimes, it seemed like I was the only guy who would turn somebody in. I’d turn you in in a heartbeat if I thought you were breaking the rules. Everybody should play hard but play fair. Who’s going to be the SEC’s policeman now? They don’t have one, do they?”

Steve would seem to be a better informant than most coaches. Wayne Duke, onetime Big Eight and Big Ten commissioner and a former NCAA executive, once told me that the most unreliable sources for cheating are coaches. Alumni and faculty people are considered much better sources. Spurrier was an exception.

Steve doesn’t mince words or hide his feelings, including that he believes the National Football League is tougher on miscreants than the colleges. Spurrier had a substantial pro career though he never came close to his success in college.

“In the NFL, they fine guys and suspend guys for dirty play,” Spurrier says. “In college football, you can get away with it because nobody seems to care.”

Can Spurrier, despite his solid background, do in the pros what others celebrated college coaches such as Bud Wilkinson, Dan Devine and Lou Holtz couldn’t? He’s got a five-year, $25 million contract, so he’ll get a chance.

But for all his detractors, the guy is a long way from being all bad. Holtz (South Carolina) believes Spurrier saved the life of Lou’s wife. When Mrs. Holtz was diagnosed with throat cancer, they sought a good hospital. Knowing Shands Hospital at Florida U. was a world leader in cancer research and treatment, the Holtz family tried to get her admitted. No luck. Steve Spurrier learned about it and quickly made calls to doctors at Shands. The next day, Spurrier called Holtz and told him his wife would be admitted. She went into remission and things got a lot better. Steve’s postponed football functions to avoid interference with lesser attended university athletic events such as swimming and tennis matches.

Along with all his talents, Spurrier has become a magnet for good luck, from college on through his Florida coaching tenure. Emblematic of how he’s supposed to land on his feet was an Atlanta Journal quote in 1966 when Spurrier kicked the field goal that beat Auburn and clinched the Heisman:

“Blindfolded, with his back to the wall, with his hands tied behind him, Steve Spurrier would still be a two-point favorite at his own execution.”

I’d love to see the feisty, colorful rascal shake up coaching with a supersuccessful move into the NFL.