‘Royal Family at Work’ a misnomer

Viewers with a thing for the sceptered set can spend six hours with Queen Elizabeth II and her retinue over the next three Wednesday nights as PBS presents “Monarchy: The Royal Family at Work” (7 p.m., PBS, check local listings).

Like all officially sanctioned documentaries about the royals, “Monarchy” makes much of the queen’s half century of service, her unflappable style and her subjects’ adoration for her sense of duty. The first installment of “Work” follows Elizabeth and Prince Philip on a 2007 trip to Virginia and Washington to commemorate the 400th anniversary of the Jamestown settlement.

This also appears to be the 50th anniversary of the queen’s 1957 visit for the 350th anniversary of the Jamestown settlement. That commemoration of a commemoration says much about the film and, and perhaps, about the Queen’s “job.” If, as the saying goes, half of work is just showing up, then the queen does a very good job of showing up.

Most of the actual “work” on display in “The Royal Family at Work” is undertaken by other people. We watch hundreds scrambling to make sure that her meals are just so and that her plane, entourage and limousine arrive on schedule. We’re assured that her towels and sheets are washed at least four times before she uses them and a Virginia hotel manager assures us that she’s been given a brand new toilet seat for the occasion – because that just seemed the right and royal thing to do.

Films like “Monarchy” remind us that it’s nice to be polite and respectful when the royals visit or when we visit their castles as tourists. But all of the fawning and bowing on display reminded me of how happy I am that we dispensed with all that back in 1776.

l What do male viewers want? The folks at the G4 network are hoping it’s “Human Wrecking Balls” (9:30 p.m., G4). The show features two extreme athletes given the chance to demolish things like cars, bars, offices, bowling alleys and even airplanes – all with their bare hands.

Their first tasks are to demolish and empty the contents of a hotel room. Don’t go looking for random violence and destruction. OK, go ahead.

Voiceovers and graphics instruct us about their technique and the structural strengths and weakness of the items on their list. Sure, any addled rock star can toss a television out a window, but busting down a wall re-enforced by steel beams takes a little strategy. A guy could get hurt. That’s why there is a shapely nurse on duty at all times.

¢ “Vanguard” (9 p.m., Current TV) travels to Greenland, where some residents are happy to experience climate change in a segment called “I Heart Global Warming.”

¢ Chefs with talent and egos that never sleep travel to New York for a new season of “Top Chef” (9 p.m., Bravo).

Tonight’s other highlights

¢ Red herrings and fools’ errands on “Bones” (7 p.m., Fox).

¢ Brad Paisley and Carrie Underwood host the 42nd Annual CMA Awards from Nashville’s Sommet Center (7 p.m., ABC).

¢ Murder stalks the mall on “Life” (8 p.m., NBC).

¢ An apparent drug-related murder may be more complicated on “Law & Order” (9 p.m., NBC).

¢ The guys on “Prototype This” (9 p.m., Discovery) work on a backyard waterslide.