Commentary: Stooge? Not this Appalachian squad

I had to laugh, at least a little bit, at what Journal-World sports editor Tom Keegan wrote prior to Kansas University’s season-opener with Florida Atlantic on Saturday.

“Florida Atlantic University, Appalachian State, Louisiana Tech. Henceforth, let this be known as the Moe, Larry and Curly portion of the Kansas University football schedule.

“And everyone knows what must be done when confronted by Three Stooges: Poke them in the eyes, bop them on the heads, steel-toe them when they’re down, just thoroughly humiliate them by whatever means imaginable.”

I guess Keegan saw “The Longest Yard.”

Well, the Jayhawks beat Moe, otherwise known as Florida Atlantic, 30-19, though I don’t think FAU felt humiliated. In fact, Kansas trailed Moe 13-12 with 3:02 left in the third quarter and easily could have lost that game.

Today, Kansas faces Larry in Lawrence. That’s (Larry) Fine with Appalachian.

Keegan went on to say in his Sept. 3 column that head coach Mark Mangino should run the score up so high on Florida Atlantic, Appalachian State and Louisiana Tech that he “should be blasted from coast to coast by all the national commentators for running up the score. Ideally, his response would be to run up the score some more the following week.”

To be fair, Keegan wrote his column before the Florida Atlantic game, but he is not alone in thinking that any I-A team should just roll up the score on any I-AA foe.

Well, before Mangino runs the score up on Appalachian State, he better tell his left tackle to at least block No. 44 in the white jersey and for his right tackle to block No. 97.

Eastern Kentucky didn’t block Marques Murrell or Jason Hunter on key plays and it cost the Colonels 14 points. Kansas might also want to make things tough on Appalachian State quarterback Richie Williams, who will be the best signal caller on the field today.

Whaaaa? The Division I-A, Big 12 Conference, Rock, Chalk, Jayhawks can’t find a quarterback better than Williams? Heck, the Jayhawks are struggling to find a quarterback who can move the team. Will it be Adam Barmann or Brian Luke?

Or does Nolan Cromwell have any eligibility left?

OK, I know that Appalachian State has not beaten a team west of the Mississippi River since, ummm, ever. And I know that Appalachian State has stumbled against I-A foes the last three years, having been stampeded by Wyoming in 2004, Hawaii in 2003 and Marshall in 2002.

Still, I also know that this game is worth more to Appalachian State than the $325,000 payout it will receive. The Mountaineers have not made the Division I-AA playoffs since 2002 and a win over Kansas would go a long way in securing a spot in the 2005 edition.

It’s also not completely out of the question that the Mountaineers can win this game. Ask Nebraska, a member of the Big 12’s North Division, if it had an easy time with Maine last week. The once-mighty Huskers led 9-0 at halftime before winning 25-7.

Iowa State, another Big 12 North Division team, got all it wanted and a bit more from Illinois State before finally prevailing 32-21. So did Big 12 South Division team Oklahoma State, which squeaked past Montana State 15-10.

How’s that for being Moe and Larry and Curly?

Appalachian State plans to play the wisenheimer and escape Kansas with a victory. Playing the Jayhawks’ stooge is not in ASU’s plans.