At last! New Year’s resolutions for the people who need ’em most — THE ELECTRONIC-DEVICE DESIGNER’S SOLEMN PLEDGE:

From this point forth, I, a dyed-in-the-silicon techie who intuitively understands all gadgets, will accept the fact that what seems “obvious” to me is “& impossible!” to everyone else. I will therefore keep someone like my doddering great aunt in mind whenever I design household objects, such as an electric toothbrush. (Even though great auntie doesn’t have any teeth. I know that’s not the point.)

So, anyway: I hereby pledge that every function on every gadget will have its own button. For instance, an alarm clock will have one button for setting the alarm and a completely separate button for setting the time. Even if it seems painfully obvious to me that you just tap the button once for time and twice for alarm — four times if you want to reset it for p.m. during daylight-saving time — and that’s that. But, no, I will give you all sorts of little buttons for your little minds. Promise.

When I affix an on-off switch, it will be clearly labeled “on-off” and not “standby.”

Similarly, a play button shall state the word “play,” and not be just a circle, an arrow, or an arrow in a circle.

Furthermore, these words — “play,” “off” and “on” — shall be displayed in a color that contrasts with the object itself. On no account will they be written in raised black plastic on a black plastic surface.

And speaking of no-nos, when I design a remote control, it will not have three buttons along the top that say, “TV,” “VCR” and “TV/VCR,” because that, admittedly, is infuriating.

Nor will it have weird buttons that say things like “zero back” and “tamperproof” which, on a slow day in ’97, we added just to confuse you.

When designing cordless phones, I will confer with my fellow designers to decide once and for all whether the phone will answer automatically when you pick it up or you first have to press “talk.”

We will also universally agree that, from now on, “talk” shall not also mean “hang up.”

And when we get around to designing a new generation of cell phones … forget it. We’ll never agree on cell phones. But I pledge never to make the on button red again, as I did for a while in ’02 — even though that provided a lot of laughs.

As for other appliances: I will design no more microwaves with different levels of heating. I am keenly aware that everyone wants to nuke on high, just like everyone wants Tylenol that is Extra Strength.

I will make all radios with knobs.

I will add absolutely no new functions to the digital camera. In fact, I’ll take a couple off, like pixel choice.

With everything I design, I will include the appropriate batteries.

But I can’t promise to tell you where they go.

Lenore Skenazy is a columnist for the New York Daily News. Her e-mail address is lskenazy@edit.nydailynews.com.