Bagram, Afghanistan ? The first major unit of American soldiers heading home from Afghanistan packed their bags Wednesday with everything from Qurans swiped from the bodies of dead al-Qaida fighters to Afghan hats traded for cigarettes.

But the infantry soldiers from the 10th Mountain Division also take home some more complicated baggage  new ideas about war and politics and, for some, the memory of what it feels like to kill.

“I didn’t feel anything. I didn’t feel hate, sad, happy  I just killed him,” said Spc. Andrew Spurlock, of Apopka, Fla., remembering the enemy fighter he found hiding near a cave during the Operation Anaconda offensive in early March.

“I didn’t feel anything,” the 23-year-old repeated.

Spurlock, among departing U.S. soldiers hanging out Wednesday at Bagram air base, playing football, napping and doing some last-minute packing, said he won’t be like others “who might go crazy or get depressed” by what they witnessed.

“It’ll always be there, but I didn’t change any,” he said.

The 10th Mountain soldiers, making up the allies’ main fighting force in the Afghan campaign, began heading home Tuesday from Bagram, a former Soviet base about an hour north of Kabul. More troops were heading out Thursday, and nearly all 1,000 from the division should be gone by mid-April, stopping in Germany before arriving home to Fort Drum, N.Y.

Looking out at the mountain of stuffed duffel bags laid out at Bagram’s camp, soldiers described the few souvenirs they had packed: traditional Afghan hats  called pacouls  blankets, scarves and dress uniforms traded with soldiers from other countries. Some described their colleagues stealing keepsakes from dead enemy fighters, including pocket Qurans and Pakistani currency.

The soldiers, many of whom saw combat for the first time, are bringing home stories about exploding caves and helicopter transports through mountainous fighting zones that were both beautiful and terrifying.

They are also bringing a new appreciation for what life is like in one of the world’s poorest countries.

“I’ve seen the way these people live, little kids walking around without shoes,” said Spc. Javish Rosa of New York City. “You watch it on TV at home and just turn the channel. Here you can’t do that.”

Rosa, 22, said he felt his tour in Afghanistan had given him a feeling of purpose.

“A lot of people back home say, ‘Yeah, I wish I was there, I would’ve done this or that.’ But I can say I was here and I did something about it,” he said.

Haunting memories

Pfc. Marco Torres is still haunted by his first helicopter trip into the mountains during Operation Anaconda, hoping somebody with a rocket-propelled grenade won’t shoot down the plane.

“You feel relief when you hit the ground,” said the 22-year-old from Huntington Station on New York’s Long Island. “Even though you’re in a combat situation, you just survived one of the hardest situations.”

Torres said the war opened his eyes to “the evils” that Americans face, and made him think more deeply about those who wage war on the United States. “They want to be heard, and they’re willing to do anything to make their opinions known,” he said.

Spurlock said the experience of killing and war teaches young soldiers to grow up fast  how to know the difference between when it’s time to play around and time to work. He folds and unfolds his hands as he describes what it was like when his team shot a man hiding behind a blanket  his hands visible, holding up the fabric, and his feet sticking out below  and said he suspects it’s not something people back home will understand.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to relate to people about what happened here.”

Even as the 10th Mountain packed up to go home, life and war churned on at Bagram. One row from where they readied their duffels to be loaded on transport planes, an Afghan with a front-loader set up rows of portable toilets for the incoming troops.