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The Easter Bunny: The Stuff of Nightmares

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Dying eggs, chocolate bunnies, Grandma’s potato salad — these are all things that come to mind when I think of Easter. They are things that I’m excited to pass down to my children as we continue to establish our own holiday traditions. There’s one thing from my childhood that I’m omitting though: visiting the Easter bunny. Why? Because that guy is absolutely terrifying.

I’ve always personally thought this, but it was further validated last week when my friend shared this image on her Facebook page:

Right? HORRIFYING.

Why on Earth did we ever decide that an adult-sized human dressed up as a giant animal would be a good idea? Then we tell kids that the creepy bunny comes and hides eggs for us to find? I think we have enough trouble with nightmares from the day my husband forgot to turn off Jurassic Park after nap time ended. We don’t need to add the fact that the giant furry man knows where we live.

Seriously, though, why a giant man bunny? What does that have to do with Easter? Why does he have eggs? Did he raid the local farmer’s chicken coop? Because that’s illegal. We probably shouldn’t teach the kids to steal and hide the goods around our house. That could backfire.

So now I have a conundrum. I kind of have to stick with the Easter bunny schtick because it’s everywhere. Maybe I’ll just tell them it’s a magical real bunny. As in, normal size and normal proportions. Not a furry. But I won’t be buying into the whole “The Easter bunny poops jelly beans” thing that was on a movie a few years back. NO. We do not need to associate poop with ANYTHING edible. You can only imagine where my toddler and preschooler’s minds will go.

This year, we’ll be putting on some pretty dresses, dying some eggs, hiding some plastic ones, and making Grandma’s potato salad. And this idea that my husband’s aunt shared with us:

http://www.pinterest.com/pin/155937205822390582/

You plant the “magic” jelly beans the night before Easter and when the kids wake up the next morning, suckers grew where they planted the beans. HJ will lose it. She LOVES suckers.

What does your family do? (If you say “We go visit the Easter Bunny” I promise I won’t judge. I will applaud your bravery.

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