What Do You Do About: Carpenter Bees?

LJWorld.com weblogs Stop Me If You've Heard This One

Posted by Roedapple May 10, 2011 at 4:08 p.m.

For about the last week the yearly infestation has been coming to a peak. Wood bees. Carpenter bees. Those Buzzing B@st^rds are back with a vengeance this year! Used to be I would try to spray them with wasp spray, but their erratic flight patterns cause most of that to land on pavement, gravel or siding. Then for a few years I tried various chemicals made for problem critters stuffed into their nests and dusted around the decks, all with little effect. I'm told if the neighbors have them and do nothing to be rid of them, or if you live near a wooded area with a lot of deadfall, they will always be a problem. Bingo! on both items! Well, any of you that know ole Roe know he always has a solution, even if it ain't right. For every sporting utensil out there, be it bowling pins, golf balls, or whatever, ole Roe can find an alternative use for it. While rummaging through the furnace room (or junk room as we tend to call it, the only room in the house where the Mrs rules aren't enforced as heavily) I found some old badminton rackets from when the younguns still occupied the premises. In the infinite wisdom of a former truck driver,( cough), I deducted that if the kids still wanted them they would have them in THEIR junk rooms! Last week I started swinging like a madman at those erratic flying little beasts, knocking eight of them outa the sky in four days. This I considered practice, watching flying patterns and figuring strategy. Yesterday the swarm musta hatched out full force, they were everywhere! Toward evening, when they seemed to be slowing down, I grabbed my trusty badminton racket and moved in! Eighteen of the evil drones lay in the grass and on the deck in less than half an hour! Pure decimation, death to the multitude! If you see me walking down your street carrying my racket, I'm not a danger to anyone. Unless you are a carpenter bee.

by RoeDapple

Bring it!

(images from web sources)

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RoeDapple 2 years ago

Another thirteen today! The crowd is thinning. Need to start looking for something new to entertain myself . . .

Did_I_say_that 2 years ago

"What Do You Do About: Carpenter Bees?"

I don't know. But, you had best do something before the Union or ICE finds out you have migrant workers.

snap_pop_no_crackle 2 years ago

Take away their tiny hammers and saws?

RoeDapple 2 years ago

DIST - No green cards and none of them speak English. Bring in the black helicopters!

snap - now that my hearing aids are working correctly they sound like they're using power tools!

tally for today now 16

vertigo 2 years ago

Locate the wood in which the bees are active and apply an insecticidal dust directly into nest openings. This is best accomplished by using a duster that will puff the dust up into the tunnel and coat the sides. To avoid possible stings, treat the area at night. Use a flashlight, over which a piece of red cellophane has been taped. The bees cannot see the red light, but you should be able to see the openings.

Do not plug the holes immediately! The bees should be able to pass freely through the nest entrance where they will contact the dust and distribute it inside the tunnels. Also any new matured bees will emerge through the openings and contact the dust placed there. It is a good idea to treat in the spring, when bees are first observed, again in mid-summer to kill any bees which may not have acquired a sufficient treatment when they emerged, and a third time in early fall to contact any over-wintering bees occupying the tunnels. In the fall, the holes should be filled with wood putty or wooden dowels and the entire wood surface painted or varnished.

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Thanks Jesse, that's probably what I did wrong before. But I'm having a blast knocking them outa the sky! Most fun you can have with your clothes on! (I'm not the brightest bulb on the tree, you understand)

Did_I_say_that 2 years ago

Probably best to keep the clothes on while swatting bees. OUCH!

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Problem may be solved (temporarily) blue! final count for today, . . .23! And no sign of any for the last half hour. Total for the season . . 47. Next year I break out the air rifle!

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Holy cow, another 13 today, plus the hired man swung at one and hit it with his water bottle! Very quiet this evening though, if their reinforcements don't show up tomorrow I may be done. 61 total.

riverdrifter 2 years ago

I used to kill them the sporting way: I'd shoot them out of the air with .22 birdshot. It was a lot of fun but not very efficient. I got pretty good at it though.

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Oh come on riverdrifter! Next year let's just slap them between our hands! (Leather gloves suggested)

riverdrifter 2 years ago

The bigger males can't sting but the females (smaller) can. Once I lined up two & took'em out with a single shot.

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Yeah I had read that. I tried for a double and even a triple but never got 'em. Maybe next year!

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Tommy likes to get out on the screened deck in nice weather. If I look out the kitchen window and see him moving his head randomly and looking tense I know to grab the racket - - - He's spotted another one!

LHS56 2 years ago

Thanks for the information. I've been fighting them for years. I don't have a badminton racket but do have a tennis racket. Hey...and it is king size! Looking forward to some fun. (In the past I've felt like Bill Murry fighting the grounghogs.)

RETICENT_IRREVERENT 2 years ago

Diesel fuel. Apply liberally. Ignite,

RoeDapple 2 years ago

Good idea Ret! . . But . . wait? Something seems flawed with your suggestion . . .

LadyJ 2 years ago

Well Roe, I see one of you cuzins is selling off one of his prized possessions on craigslist http://lawrence.craigslist.org/for/2373853459.html

RoeDapple 2 years ago

sumpin loooks awfill flamilar bout that boyz ritin just sayin maybe i culd traed him sum wellused glof balls fer it

bad_dog 2 years ago

Wise Rosco pitchered layin on top of thet dawg anywaz? At lease hiz hatz on strate. We neeed Autie'z opinonion.

Solomon 2 years ago

In past years, the critters attacked the underside of my balcony over my deck. Last fall I painted the underside and this year the beasts have flirted with my deck but have not drilled a single hole. Keeping my fingers crossed.

riverdrifter 2 years ago

My old black cat, Lucifer, woud eat every one I shot off my deck. Crunch, crunch, crunch. It was disgusting. Then I'd take another sip of my martini.

geekin_topekan 2 years ago

ChristJesus was a carpenter. 300,000 little crosses might work for a coupla days. Three tops. But, how many arms do bees have?

RoeDapple 2 years ago

On the 12th I got 7. Total now of 68. No sign of any since but of course it has been cooler. If no more appear the next batch should hatch out in August. The racket is ready and so am I

DougCounty 2 years ago

Roe, I sure like your approach! I just got a can of wasp spray for the little boogers, but maybe I'll rustle up a badminton racket instead and put the spray in the pantry for backup, eh? Sounds like somethin my kid would enjoy doing. I've always told anyone visiting that they can't sting, and not to worry, and they never have stung anyone here as far as I know, but they can be kinda unnerving at times.

RoeDapple 2 years ago

DougCounty, For all their darting back and forth, they will stop and hover for about three seconds every so often. Have your racket ready and drop 'em when you recognize the pattern! You'll hear two very satisfying clacks!!, one when you hit it and another when it hits the driveway!

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