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LJWorld.com weblogs Dakotah Drives

Dakotah - Anticipation

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http://worldonline.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com/img/blogs/entry_img/2009/Feb/09/Talking_Horses.jpgHow many times have we heard, “A watched pot never boils”? It has also been said that what separates the human species from lower forms of life is that humans have the power of reason and anticipation.To that end, I was anticipating a day of observing Dakotah visit a few of his new Modesto friends, in addition to reconnecting with his sisters (after a nine-year period of time), daughter, and grandchildren; of whom, this would be the first meeting of his grandchildren. One of the ironic points of comparison between Dakotah and me is that we share an estrangement between ourselves and our daughters. My youngest daughter (age twenty-four and a mother of a son) has not been part of my life for almost six years. Although I can not point to a ‘single’ incident that caused the estrangement, suffice it to say I fell off the pedestal on top which a little girl places her daddy, and have been unable to find common ground for co-existence.In many ways, (and I have to be painfully honest here) I was hoping to learn how reconciliation played out in hope of creating the same scenario for myself; but it was not to be. When I called Dakotah to let him know we were only an hour away from arriving to his Modesto camp, he told me his daughter called and cancelled their visit.I asked Dakotah how he felt about his daughter not making it Sunday and he stated “…I’m okay with it. I’m going to be heading toward Redding on Wednesday anyway; so we’ll have another chance to visit the next time she drives her route up that way. It might be better if it was just her and I anyway; might give us some privacy not having other company”Dakotah’s camp sets just beyond where Modesto suburban sprawl meets rural America. A young family adopted Dakotah, and his horses these last two weeks, by opening their small walnut farm to him. As we pulled up, his horses were running around the grove like children chasing each other on a park playground.Dakotah quipped, “…I have to keep moving the fence (his portable electric horse-fence) further out. They have been eating the grass in the grove right down to the nubs. I’ll bet they (the grove owners) are seeing ground they haven’t seen in years. My horses are better at mowing grass than a weed-eater” Rain finally came to the area the previous day, but the sun was out just enough for two of Dakotah’s sisters, his brother-in-law, and a few friends to come by and share their stories.http://worldonline.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com/img/blogs/entry_img/2009/Feb/09/Dakotah_and_Sister.jpgNine years is a long time not to see someone, and changes to our appearance seem to come more quickly as we age. As a van pulled up and stopped, in Dakotah’s opinion, too close to the road to be safe (this two-lane country road could at times be mistaken for a drag strip), he approached a woman as she opened her car door and said, “Ma’am, you really shouldn’t park there; people around here drive too fast and might hit your van…” To which the woman responded, “…Ron? It’s Junyelle, your sister!” Dakotah turned several shades of red and began laugh as he reached over and gave his sister a hug.The scene that followed was a cross between Christmas morning and the unloading of a naval supply ship. A cadre of clothing, blankets, and pantry items were packed and zippered neatly into clear-packing containers; in such a quantity one might think Dakotah was planning to open a concession stand.http://worldonline.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com/img/blogs/entry_img/2009/Feb/09/Dakotah_-Christmas_in_Februrary.jpgOf all the items brought by his sister, two appeared to be an instant favorite. One was a red cowboy shirt with pearl buttons and an artistic barbwire design embroidered across both sides of the two chest-pockets. And when I say red, I mean bright red; the likes of which road flares burn in the dark of night.http://worldonline.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com/img/blogs/entry_img/2009/Feb/09/Red_Shirt_Dakotah.jpgThe other item was a cookie confection made with two Ritz™ crackers with a peanut butter center, covered in dark chocolate. Dakotah offered me a cookie, and before I could decline (I had just eaten lunch moments before she arrived), Dakotah looked at me and said, “…now I wouldn’t ordinarily mind if someone didn’t take me up on my offer of food, but these cookies were hand-made by my sister, and they are world famous”. And so I did, and am glad I had.http://worldonline.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com/img/blogs/entry_img/2009/Feb/09/Dakotah-_Sisters_and_BNL.jpgInasmuch as Dakotah hadn’t recognized his sister, I asked her if Dakotah had changed much. She said, “…no; you have to realize, we’re (the family) used to Ron. You guys are the only ones that think he’s special…it’s just Ron”. The same might be said of Dakotah’s other home in Arco, Idaho; the town in which Dakotah’s brother lives.Dakotah asked that I contact the editor of local newspaper, the Arco Advertiser and send him some of the stories from the road so that his brother and other friends might enjoy reading them. When I told Dakotah that my phone call and email letter had gone unreturned, in typical Dakotah style, he looked up at me and grinned and said, “…a prophet has no honor in his hometown.” So it seems.Sunday, Dakotah added a new member to his horse team, a six-year old Quarter Horse gelding, named J.R. This horse is a loving gift from two local men, Derrick and Don Wilson, and for which Dakotah is most thankful.J.R. is a beautiful horse that will soon join the other four on the road to somewhere else; leaving behind memories of a man we have come to know and miss as we wait for the next time destiny calls us to a common point.Drive on DakotahOther stories about Dakotah can be found here:http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakot... http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2008/dec/07/dakotah-drives-part-2/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2008/dec/14/the-heart-of-dakotah/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2008/dec/21/inside-dakotah/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2008/dec/23/a-dakotah-christmas/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2008/dec/31/dakotah-a-place-in-time/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/01/willits-redux/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/05/dakotah-the-drive-ends/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/10/dakotah-the-winters-end/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/13/dakotah-remarkably-unremarkable/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/19/dakotah-a-yin-and-yang/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/23/dakotah-powered-by-light/http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/dakotah-drives/2009/jan/27/dakotah-agent-of-change/

Comments

Alia Ahmed 5 years, 10 months ago

Charles,Great story. I hope for you and Dakotah that both of you can rekindle the special relationship between a father and his daughter. Drive on Dakotah and write on Charles.

tangential_reasoners_anonymous 5 years, 10 months ago

Anticipation is makin' me late ( keepin' me waitin' ) .another daybathed in south wind sun... gotta run

Charles Edwards 5 years, 10 months ago

OMG, MD, you just made me laugh so hard I almost spit coffee out of my nose.Tang; Thanks for the Carly reference; we have run in some of the same spheres of influence.Alia; My estrangement between my daughter and I is one reason this story was so long in coming. It is so hard to separate myself from my subject on this topic.I have found the only way to deal with it most times is not to think about it; but I am mindful that the days click by quickly, and I ain't getting any younger.I hope to write about how this relationship turns out someday too.Peace to you all, and thank you for your comments. MD, you are too funny! :-)

Ronda Miller 5 years, 10 months ago

Mr, Chuck,Great shots your wife took of Dakotah..love that red shirt...it is one I would certainly wear. Don't give up the hope that your relationship with your daughter will change for the better...keep putting out the leads, be honest about your short comings (or at least open to hearing from her what they were), and you might be pleasantly surprised one day...and then work at maintaining that relationship for the next twenty, thirty years. I was in my early twenties when I tracked my Father down...no regrets except that it was the first,(in fifteen years), last, only time I saw him before he died a couple of years later. Our life experiences help us accept and understand other peoples shortcomings as we ourselves parent and grow.Don't put off the things, such as this relationship, that are important in both of your(and your grandson too) lives. But you already know this..don't give up......

Charles Edwards 5 years, 10 months ago

Thanks, MD...that was too funny. I am going to put it on is MySpace.Ronda;Thanks for sharing your story. I hope she will give me a chance someday. Right now, she has made it ABUNDANTLY clear "...I just don't have time to have a relationship with you right now. My life is too busy"I get it, but it still hurts beyond my ability to say accurately; and for "Mr. Words" that says a lot.

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