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Carol the Coach's Dream About Oprah: We Can Help

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Whether they're large, small, black and white, or in color, we all have them - dreams. They're what a large part of our waking and sleeping lives are about. They keep us going in the bleakest of times and give us something to focus and strive towards. Some people simply dream, never taking the smallest of baby steps towards making their dream(s) materialize. Others create through their dreams - allowing and encouraging themselves the ability to let the subconscious slip over them; envelope them, understanding that we can trust ourselves to know what is right for us. Still others deny any dreams.

I met Carol the Coach, as she's referred to in the Indianapolis area, when I began flying to and from Chicago to pursue my dream of becoming a Life Coach. (I wanted to work with people who had lost someone to suicide or homicide by helping them stay connected with their loved one by fulfilling that individual's dream.)

Carol Juergensen Sheets (LCSW PCC CSAT Motivation Speaker) is a mighty name for a woman of such small stature, but it suits her powerful spirit and her ability to dream large. Carol has already accomplished more than most of us hope to dream for. She is a columnist for Indy Metro Woman, The Daily Journal, Indy Sports-The Men's Magazine and Healthy Living with Teresa Tanoose, and she hosted a weekly hour talk show from 2007-2009 "Sex, Love, and Relationships". But Carol has a new 'old' dream. She has been contacting Oprah to no avail for eight years in an attempt to promote, "Group Work for Woman" which is Carol's dream to change the lives of women one step and one woman at a time.

I found out about Carol's dream a few days ago and thought it'd be fun to help her achieve her dream. You can help too! Carol will be coming on throughout the day and evening (between client sessions) to explain more and to answer any questions. Carol says it's been implied that since she is no "Barbie Doll" she doesn't stand a chance. Carol's response, "Dr. Phil is no Ken!" Let's prove 'them' wrong and give Carol our support. Carol has until the end of July 3rd to make her dream come true.

What are your dreams and which ones have come true? What is the most extreme thing you've been willing to do to make them come true?

Comments

Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

My first question to Carol is the obvious one. Carol, what exactly can we do to assist with your dream of getting on Oprah's show?

My next question: Why the need to become a life coach in addition to your other credentials?

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

All you have to do is hit this link that will take you directly to my audition for Oprah. It is a 3 minute video and after watching it ...if you decide that you like the project. you can vote daily . I just submitted the video over the weekend so I am way behind on votes. Votes mean recognition but they aren't the only way to win the contest The producer of Survivor is going to pick 5 finalists. Go to www.oprah.com and then hit the link that says Browse auditions and put in my name Carol Sheets It will pull up my video and then all you have to do is vote. I so appreciate people supporting the project.

.

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

I have always felt that my life purpose was to help others to identify their internal strengths and coaching allows me to assist people in taking their life to the next level. We live in a world whereby we have 60,000 thoughts a day and most of them are negative. My goal is to help people change that internal dialogue and see the positives about themselves and their world.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

60,000 thoughts and mostly negative ones....I would have guessed at least two thirds of them were sexual...no? ;)

That is a heck of a lot of thinking going on, Carol. Where does someone begin to change so much negative thinking? How do they become aware that they even are thinking in a negative manner - they are so used to it!

I remember a dear friend, my attorney and spiritual adviser, telling me one time that I could choose to look out the window of life and see Bambi running around with his mom in the forest, or I could choose to see a heap of trash. That has really stuck with me and although I maybe had heard many times before that it was up to me how I viewed events, it really struck home. How come sometimes a light will come on for an individual, but not other times? Is it timing, the amount of times we hear something, an openness to a new idea, higher power? Any thoughts on that?

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

While I'm waiting for Carol to come on, or for other people to ask questions or make comments, I'd like to publicly thank the World Company (in particular Ralph Gage) for all the ways they have made, and continue to make, my dreams come true. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think how grateful I am to have the opportunity to express myself - I'm talking about our great nation and our freedom of speech as well as the freedom of the press. In particular, the World Company continues to allow me to express myself through blogs, poetry, fiction - they give license to creativity. It's truly been a dream come true and I expect other dreams to continue to become true because of their trust, guidance and assistance.

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Kontum1972 4 years, 2 months ago

to eat at that Hot Dog place in chi-town....and have oprah pay for it....,then we go to buddy guy's place and we all get hammered and play the blues...EC and Scott Holt are invited too....then go to the Blackstone Hotel and steal the towels....duhhhhhhhh!

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Is EC ---Eric Clapton. He is coming to Indy this Friday and I am going!

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Well I'm seeing Bob Dylan in a month or so..... I've never seen Clapton though so I'm jealous. And I didn't get tickets to McCartney! :*(

Have a great time and let us know how the concert is.

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Is EC ---Eric Clapton? He is coming to Indy this Friday and I am going!

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

What are either of you doing towards making your dreams come true? And, yes, I already regret asking that question.

In terms of my own dreams, I have started sending poems around to be published. You can't become published if you don't submit. I believe Carol has written some books and is published.

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Flap Doodle 4 years, 2 months ago

Do you need a whistle & a clipboard to be a life coach?

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

No, just the skills to motivate, inspire, bring each individual's personal best to the forefront. Very good question. Life coaching is similar to sports coaching and it involves all aspects of a person: spirituality, sexuality, health and fitness, family, creativity, work - the list is indefinite.

I've heard it well described when compared to physical therapy versus massage. Getting therapy would be as physical therapy and Life Coaching more intune with massage. Both heal and feel good over time, but the life coach works on moving forward rather than looking back.

Share your dreams, snap!

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

"Lose It" will likely be a hit. Jillian is an inspirational to all of us! And I'm just a tiny bit fearful of her. :)

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workinghard 4 years, 2 months ago

Well this little girl will probably never need a life coach http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHvo2aCG_xc

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

She is actually fairly representational of most children that age who have good self esteem and parents who indulge. I was a bit fearful of her falling off the counter top but I have a height thing I'm working on with my Life Coach.

Don't we all wish we were at the invincible age of three when anything was possible? We all can be again. That fearless child resides inside - unleash and enjoy.

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Flap Doodle 4 years, 2 months ago

I have a clipboard, I dream of getting a whistle some day.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Snap, stop dreaming. Take the first step forward and buy your own whistle. Don't wait, live each day to the fullest. And, honestly, you don't need the clipboard either.

Quashed spirits and entusiasm generally stems from fears of adults in our lives and the you can'ts or I can'ts. Children learn by example and if they're told they can't do something or they have to do things a set way, or what they do is wrong then they often start believing that message.

We call them Gremlins in life coaching. Someone close to us when we're a child tells us we're incapable, dumb, ugly, have a bad voice, are clumsy, stupid, etc., and in time we no longer need that other person to say those things to us - we repeat them to ourselves over and over.

The three year old we saw performing has it going on. We need to tell ourselves every day the things we love, not only about everyone else in our lives, but about ourselves. Switch out the negative and replace with a positive. Leave the I can'ts in the trash. It is truly about attitude.

I've heard word from Carol the Coach and she'll be checking in around eight this evening.

Keep reading, The Little Engine That Could" until then. It isn't, I think I can, it's, I know I can until we don't have to think, we just do

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

There is a time and place for reflection - after you've taken your personal challenge.

Here is a link to learn more about Carol's process and for her to tell you in her own words what she is wanting to do.

http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=19153&promo_id=1

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Thanks Rhonda ...can you add that link to my initial comment cuz for some reason it wasn't working for me. I love working with people and altho I have my own blog on my website www.CaroltheCoach.com I am still learning how to navigate through this?

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Carol, I can't add it to your comment but it is placed directly under it now.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Hi Carol! You sure have a busy schedule and work long hours! I'm aware there is the time lag between Indy and Lawrence though so don't let us keep you up too late. Some of our online people seriously never sleep and there are rumors about vampires among us! :)

I can't add anything once you've posted your comment but since the link is presented, we should be good.

Quick question and then I'll backtrack a bit to ask you a few others.

Give me a quick three items from the tool book you wrote that will benefit women. I was going to include men - as we know, anything that benefits one sex means additional benefits for the other generally speaking. Do you agree?

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Yep...I am a workaholic because I love it so much but I have to tell you I am working on Work-Life Balance because I believe I can accomplish more if I work less....now do vampires have work life balance issues:0)

Tools from the tool book---HMMMM---Actually I talk about this on youtube/carolthecoach. One of the most important skills I teach peopleis that conflict in healthy relationships breeds intimacy...no not sexual intimacy but emotional intimacy and when there is conflict....a person should do 4 things 1. Ask how they contributed to the problem AND most importantly only accept 10% of the problem 2. Tell them self no matter what the issue is...the conflct that someone is feeling is 90% about the other person 3.Tell themself that they should not give anyone the POWER to make him or herself feel angry, inadequate, guilty 4. Have faith in one of 3 things Self, the relationship or a higher power that things will work out.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Carol, talk a little bit about the difference between healthy and unhealthy conflict within relationships. We know even the best relationships include conflict. Is it what the conflict is about that makes it positive or negative or just how the conflict is handled?

When does one truly know a conflict in a relationship can't be resolved.

Also, I'm surprised about the percentage a person within a relationship should honor as their own - ten percent? What happened to 50 - 50?

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Here's another question, Carol once you get the time. You and I have discussed briefly that you don't feel Oprah uses Life Coaching skills, with the exception of recently she's really making the attempt to be non judgemental. Which Life Coaching skills do you feel she could most benefit from using. I'm thinking A and V, but we'll see what your answer is. (btw, did I ever mention it was easy for me to remember those essentials because my children's names begin with A and V?). :)

You seem to identify with Oprah in respect to being childless. Are there additional ways you're similar - obviously Oprah is not a Barbie Doll either.

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Actually...I didn't mean to intimate that O doesn't use life skills because I think she does use them with regularity. She actually set in motion The Law of Attraction and got everyone talking about it. Oprah has a passion for making the lives of others more fulfilled and I am all about that but to be honest Ronda...I stay away from comparing myself to anyone. EVERYONE IS UNIQUE and I think it is time you tell the troops what A and V is?

Hey it is 11:40 my time and I get up and work out at 5am so I have to go but I hope to blog more tomorrow!

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Thanks for coming on, Carol and I appreciate you have a long day. There will be more questions awaiting you when you have a stretch break.

A is acknowledging what someone said so they know they've been heard and understood. If they haven't, it also gives them rhe opportunity to clarify.

V is validating what the person just stated. One may not have to agree with their statement, assessment, opinion, or belief, but stating how you could understand how 'they' would feel the way they do under the circumstances frees them and they're able to move forward.

Nite all

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

You know Ronda...I felt that A and V might have been accepting and valuing the person because as coaches we unconditionally value and accept are clients not only where they are at but also believe that it is exactly where they are supposed to be on the journey. This is such a non judgemental profession and that is so liberating for the client and for the coach.

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Well the contest ends tomorrow so I hope that you all will link to my audition and vote again today and tomorrow. It is so energizing to have a dream and an opportunity to share it with everyone. There are so many things that we all can do to better ourselves and the world. I would love to hear one thing that each one of you would like to try if you moved past the normal fear or negative self talk.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

What is the next stage of this process for you, Carol? When do you find out the results? What will you do should the outcome be something different than your hopes, dreams?

I will vote again today and Saturday!

Personally, my dream/mission for this year is to complete my memoir and have as much poetry published as possible. I have applied for a grant towards the completion of my memoir, but NOT receiving it will not deter me from writing it this year. I have begun submitting poetry to places such as The New Yorker - something I would never have done with that dirty little gremlin speech I used to hear.

I'd say on a personal basis, the actual event of becoming a Life Coach has helped me tell myself I can do anything - and with that belief, I can!

Good luck, Carol! You are such a godsend for so many.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Where were you in class, Carol? ;()

Using the A and V as stated does tell the client you are accepting and valuing them. If you don't hear what they say and acknowledge it, you sure aren't accepting or valuing them. A and V hold together - are married in the 'good' communication that is so essential between the coach and client; or for that matter, communication between anyone. The fastest way to stop a disagreement is to say you appreciate what someone else is saying and that you understand why they think the way they do - even if you don't agree with it.

And having said that, Carol, I can appreciate your belief of how important value and acceptance are to everyone. We all need to feel that about ourselves and in particular, when we are trying to convey matters from our heart.

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

Reminder to vote for Carol today as today, July third is the last day.

Good luck, Carol! Please keep us apprised!

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Ron Holzwarth 4 years, 2 months ago

You asked: "What are your dreams and which ones have come true? What is the most extreme thing you've been willing to do to make them come true?"

Years ago, there was a magazine called 'Radio-Electronics', which had electronic construction projects which you could build at home. Back in 1979, I had a dream to have one of my projects published in it. The idea was to come up with a project, draw the circuit board, have it fabricated, write an article for the magazine, and then sell kits through the mail so that other people could build the project also. And of course, make money in the process.

I had a lot of learning to do before that was possible. But finally, I ditched my career and everything and made the jump,and it actually happened in December of 1990. Later, I had a much better one in 1992. It was literally a dream come true to see my work published in an international publication, and on the cover no less! Orders for the project came in from all over, and hundreds of kits were sold. (However, it was not quite as profitable as I had hoped!)

The complete idea was to have an article published, move back to my home town, purchase a home there, and sell projects through the mail. The plan worked, more or less, but it turned out that it was necessary to come up with a continous flow of new projects, which presented a problem. And another serious problem was the magazine ceased publication a few years later.

So, long term, it didn't work - but I have a few copies of the back issues of the magazines, and sometimes when I'm really down, I take a look at them, and realize - my dream really did come true!

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

I am glad that you were able to see that your dream did indeed occur. Now what are you working on and are you living life out with passion?

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BigPrune 4 years, 2 months ago

Is it true Oprah got arrested at O'Hare? Someone told me they lifted up her dress and found 60 lbs of crack.`

I sure hope it isn't true. That is a lot of crack

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Ronda Miller 4 years, 2 months ago

And that joke really cracked me up. :). I'm glad you brought your sense of humor with you.

Ron, I'm with Carol. Once one dream has been fulfilled, then by all means start towards making another come true. We always should have goals, dreams, ambitions. Something like a dream vacation, getting a poem published, helping another person's dream come true. Dream large, dream, dream, dream on. Work and play it one step, one image at a time.

Carol, any news with your Oprah dream?

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carolthecoach 4 years, 2 months ago

Well Rhonda, Unfortunately I didn't make the cut but I thank everyone that voted for me and for all the powerful energy that occured as a result of this blog, and my blasts . Now it is your turn, I can't wait to interview you on the topic of your choice so that we can get it up on your website. I will be gone until the 26th but let me know what you want to talk about it and know that we will blog about it too. Thanks for all your help Ronda!

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