There is nothing seriously wrong with my life. I’ve been a widow for more than 10 years and have pretty much gotten used to living with that loss. I have moved into a beautiful retirement complex with other people my age that offers all kinds of activities. My two children check in on me regularly, and I see my grown grandchildren occasionally. But I feel terribly lonely. Days go by that I just stay in my apartment, watch TV and feel sorry for myself. Am I normal? How do I get myself over this?

Loneliness is one of the most formidable obstacles to health and quality of life for nearly 35 million Americans 65 and older. Loneliness results from a lack of involvement in life as a whole. It’s how you live that makes you lonely not the circumstances of your life.

You are the only one who can do something about your loneliness. I’d suggest that you start by seeing your doctor and talk with him or her about this problem and your health, medications, etc. Depression is a malady separate from loneliness that can often be treated. It is difficult to form normal relationships with others when you’re genuinely depressed.

Once you know you’re OK physically and emotionally, here are ways to defeat loneliness offered by a group called LaurusHealth, an information organization sponsored by VHA, a nationwide network of community-owned health care systems. You can find more information at www.laurushealth.com.

Get advice. Go to a senior center or an AARP group where peer groups of seniors are looking out for one another and are already involved in the community.

Get connected. Rebuild a broken social network or create a new one if old friends aren’t readily available. Seek out social groups of activities for seniors at your place of worship, local recreation department, community or retirement center. Don’t wait for others to reach out to you get to them first.

Get involved. Draw on your years of experience or your wealth of free time to help someone else. Teach a class, mentor in the public schools, volunteer at a hospital or nursing home give of yourself.

Get physical. Take a walk, ride a bike, study tai chi or join a ballroom dancing group. The activity doesn’t matter as long as you get up and move. Research shows a correlation between regular exercise and a better quality of life.

Get educated. Go back to school. Communities, colleges and organizations offer all kinds of educational opportunities for seniors in everything from agriculture to zoology.

Get online. Reap the benefits of the information revolution. A computer class can connect you with the latest technology. The Internet is a wonderful means to socialize, communicate and interact.

If you have a question or comment for “Sense for Seniors,” write to Betty Gibb, Kansas Senior Press Service, 11875 S. Sunset, Suite 200, Olathe 66061. Or you can call (913) 477-8103 or e-mail elizabeth.gibb@jocoks.com.