Being a new dad can be a perplexing and messy job at times.
The baby is crying: Is he fussy or really sick?
The baby keeps spitting out her food: Is she telling you she doesn't like the taste of peas or just having fun oozing them between her lips?
The baby has acne: Shouldn't that happen when the child's a teen-ager?
Paul Flynn, Lawrence, who will become a father this month, got the answers to those questions when he recently attended a "Dr. Dad's Workshop" organized by Mother to Mother of Douglas County.
During the two-hour class, Dr. Beth Rundquist and Jackie Counts, a program coordinator for Mother to Mother, talked about newborn babies, common childhood illnesses, connecting with the baby and safety issues.
Rundquist said new fathers should be active in the baby's care shortly after birth.
"Babies are more sturdy and flexible than we think," she said. "You need to be hands-on from day one. You've just got to get in there and do it. You've got to trust that you'll make the right decisions and do well."
Using a doll and a baby blanket, Rundquist showed Flynn how to swaddle a baby and then asked him to wrap the doll in the blanket, reminding him to tuck the baby's arms and hands close to its body.
"In the beginning, they like to have some boundaries because they are coming from a small space," she said, explaining that babies like to be wrapped snugly.
Next, she showed Flynn how to hold the baby.
"It's like carrying a football," he said.
"But remember you're not hiking them," the doctor said jokingly.
Babies are exposed to their mother's hormones while in the womb, so after they are born some babies develop acne and cradle cap a severe drying and flaking of the scalp as their bodies adjust to the withdrawal of those hormones.
And then there's that ugly section of umbilical cord that remains attached to the baby's belly button even after mom and baby leave the hospital.
"The cord is like a piece of beef jerky before it's ready to come off," Rundquist said.
Talk of immunizations, breastfeeding and jaundice led to diaper changing. Rundquist asked Flynn if he had nieces and nephews. Yes, he replied. Had he ever changed one of their diapers?
"No, that's what their moms and dads are for," he said with a smile.
Flynn explained that he works in the wastewater field so changing diapers would not be offensive to him.
"Poop is poop," he said.
In addition to diaper rash, bathing, earaches, rectal thermometers, car seats and teething, Rundquist talked about unrealistic expectations new parents often have.
"Tell your wife she's a mom, not a nurse, and she can call for help. If one parent gets frustrated, call the other one in. It's OK to give up quickly," she said. "This will change your life forever and you'll never get the same sleep again. Call in others to look after the baby so you can sleep or have some time together (with your spouse)."
Still, Rundquist reassured Flynn that nothing compares with being a new parent.
"Nothing else will be as hard as this in your life, and nothing will be as rewarding," she said.
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