Geneva Overholser is a columnist syndicated by the Washington Post Writers Group. I've read her work from time to time, but I don't know the lady couldn't pick her out of a police lineup if world peace depended on it.
So perhaps you can understand my confusion at receiving her mail. Her e-mail, to be exact, part of a testy exchange between her and a reader named Bob. In the snippet I received, she asks to be taken off Bob's mailing list, to which he responds: "No. Have the guts to be an American citizen. Or stop printing your column. You are a disgrace to the profession."
Now, I have no idea what Bob's beef is with Overholser and I really don't care. What I want to know is why on Earth he thought I needed to be privy to it. Not that I'm the only one. Bob also shared this particular missive with Hillary Clinton, George Bush, John Ashcroft and the Capital Gang television program, among many others.
I'm sure I speak for them all when I assure him that his note received the attention it deserved.
Folks like Bob are part of the reason I've come to believe that the three most terrifying words in the English language are: "You've got mail." And if you don't follow, then join me, please, for a stroll through my e-mail box.
Over here, I've got a "Scripture of the Day," received everyday like clockwork from some church I've never heard of. Right there, those are solicitations for services I'd never use and products I'd never buy. And this here is the latest letter from some guy on the Left Coast who's fighting the media conspiracy against white men, the existence of which, I must admit, I was unaware.
There's more. Press releases from organizations I know nothing about on subjects in which I have no interest. Get-rich-quick schemes from folks who'd have to come up some to be called "fly by night." Hoaxes, rumors, and, of course, jokes that make you groan like acute gastrointestinal distress.
Mind you, I get all this while using a device that's supposed to filter junk mail. I tremble to think what I'd receive if I turned that off.
While Congress natters on about trivialities like the energy crisis and campaign finance reform, it occurs to me that what they should be working on is a Bob law. Mass mail, go to jail.
You're thinking they'd never go for it? Obviously, you haven't heard about the study released this week by the Congressional Management Foundation and George Washington University. It found that the U.S. Congress itself is drowning in electronic mail. Senators receive as many as 55,000 e-mails a month while members of the House get up to 8,000. The volume is said to be increasing at the rate of a million a month.
And here I was feeling sorry for myself for having to deal with a paltry 100 or 200 a day.
The fact is, whether you're governing the country, writing a column poking fun at those who govern the country or just selling widgets in Wahoo, e-mail is consuming a growing chunk of your day. And it's only going to get worse as computers become cheaper and more ubiquitous.
I find it hard enough already just trying to keep up with correspondence from my sister in L.A., my cousin in Dallas, my readers all over the place. Put a few guys like Bob into the mix and e-mail, a once-useful tool, becomes a piece of life-clutter. Like we need another one of those.
There was a time people could not so easily make themselves heard beyond the borders of their own lives. The Net has changed that. More people are reachable by more people than at any other time in human history. I sift through the junk that daily washes up in my computer and I keep asking myself, 'Do these people really have this much time on their hands? Is there really that much to say?'
Mass mail, go to jail, that's my new slogan.
If you disagree fine. E-mail me your objections.
Better yet, e-mail Geneva Overholser. She owes me one.
Leonard Pitts Jr. is a columnist for the Miami Herald.
No comments
Commenting is turned off for this story.