and Mark Victor Hansen
June Cerza Kolf is the author of five books relating to grief. She is a frequent contributor to inspirational magazines and has recently completed a book for suicide survivors.
Feathering the Empty Nest
By June Cerza Kolf
I first heard the term "empty nest" 20 years ago; it sounded pleasant. I imagined waking up in the morning fully rested instead of having my eyes pried open by tiny fingers.
In an empty nest, I could wear clothes without spit-up stains, finish sentences when speaking to my husband and carry a purse without squeaky toys, pacifiers or cookie crumbs.
Oh, I reveled in the thought of dinnertime without spilled milk and of being able to sleep through an entire night. I could push a shopping cart filled with groceries instead of children!
Recently, I reached that sought-after goal. I felt very smug. No "empty nest syndrome" for me. That was mere psychological gibberish. I adjusted the first week with no problems at all.
By the second week, I noticed a subtle stillness had fallen over our house. The telephone had ceased ringing, and laughter no longer echoed from the back of the house.
I tried not to look into the three vacant bedrooms as I walked by. Even though the beds were all neatly made, the rooms lacked character. The one-eyed teddy bear was missing from his favorite spot on the floor. School books and papers had all disappeared. The closets, once stuffed beyond their limits, were bare.
Up close, the empty nest no longer looked quite as attractive. Just when the children became pleasant company, they moved out. Is there no justice?
When I finally crept out of my depression, I noticed my husband, who looked almost the same as he had when I had fallen wildly in love with him. Except for a bit of wear and tear, the years have been good to him. I looked at the gray hairs at his temple, knowing exactly where they had come from. The creases on his face are smile lines, not worry wrinkles, I thought, grinning to myself, yes, we have had fun.
My nest isn't empty after all, I said to myself. It still held the one special person God had given me to share my life with. In the quiet of the empty nest it would be easier for us to find each other. Maybe, just maybe, we could rekindle the sparks we had originally ignited. As if to answer my unspoken question, he looked at me and winked.
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© 1999 by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen. Distributed by King Features Syndicate.
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