Advertisement

Archive for Wednesday, June 19, 1996

HEARD IN LAWRENCE

June 19, 1996

Advertisement

A group of Lawrence and Douglas County residents recently got together for some serious discussion about increasing their involvement in the area's future. It stimulated a lot of earnest conversation.

A moderator suggested that the participants split into groups and come up with some whimsical "Top Ten" lists on how to handle various areas of concerns.

Lawrence's traffic was one concern. Some of the funnier solutions:

1. Charge a $25 exit fee at the Lawrence turnpike exits.

2. Give all KU freshmen bachelor's degrees and send them home.

3. Close 23rd Street and make it into a food court.

4. Remove the Massachusetts Street Bridge without telling anyone.

5. Move KU to Pleasant Grove.

How to handle the skateboard problem on Massachusetts Street:

1. Install giant pinball flippers at Ninth and Massachusetts.

2. Charge an impact fee.

3. Implement a dress code for skateboarders that requires them to wear brown polyester suits.

How to tell if there are too many people in Lawrence:

1. George's Tobacco shop opens a branch on 23rd Street.

2. On KU football game days, Alvamar residents are parking cars in their yards for $5 a pop.

3. The Lawrence Board of Realtors can't find a building big enough to meet in.

After the fun, things got serious again.

Commenting has been disabled for this item.